Alex drawled.
“Cal and I had been friends for a long time. He said love wasn’t just a matter of passion. It was a matter of choice. I thought he was right. He wasn’t. But—” she met his mockery defiantly “—I love Cal.”
“You thought you loved me.”
“I did,” Daisy agreed. “But that was before I found out you didn’t give a damn.”
Alex stiffened as if she’d slapped him, then surged to his feet and loomed over her. “So you fell out of love with me and in love with What’s His Face in, what? Six weeks? Less?”
“It wasn’t like that.”
“No? So, what was it like?”
She knew he didn’t really want to hear the answer. He was angry and he just wanted to put her on the defensive, pick a fight.
But Daisy wasn’t buying into that. “Sit down,” she said, and pointed at the sofa when he didn’t move. “Sit down and I’ll tell you what it was like,” she repeated sharply.
His gaze narrowed on her, but when she kept pointing, he dropped onto the sofa, still staring at her unblinkingly.
When he had settled again, Daisy tucked her feet under her and tried to find words that would make him understand.
“I was hurt when you didn’t feel what I did that weekend,” she began.
Alex started to interrupt, but she held up a hand to stop him. “I know you think I shouldn’t have been. You think I presumed too much, And—” she took a steadying breath “—you were right. I presumed far too much. But I was young and foolish, and nothing like that had ever happened to me before.”
Alex’s mouth was a thin line, but he was listening at least.
Daisy twisted the tie of her bathrobe between her fingers, staring at it before lifting her gaze again. She shrugged and told him helplessly, “I fell in love with you. It was a mistake, I admit that.” She laced her fingers in her lap and dropped her gaze to stare at them. If she looked at him, she’d realize that she was actually saying these things—and she didn’t want to be saying any of them.
She wanted her life back—the way it had been before she had gone to the dinner with him tonight, the way it had been before everything she’d worked so hard to build and hold together for the past five years had all come apart at the seams.
“When you walked out, I was humiliated,” she said. “I felt like an idiot. Sick.”
Alex’s jaw bunched. She knew he wanted to argue. He shifted uncomfortably. Daisy didn’t care. She was uncomfortable, too. They could suffer through this together.
“Weeks went by,” she continued. “Two, three, four—and instead of being able to put it behind me, I just felt sicker. And sicker. I started throwing up every morning. And that,” she said, lifting her eyes to look at him squarely now, “was when I realized that it wasn’t the memory of my idiocy that was making me sick. It was being pregnant.”
He flinched, then let out a slow breath.
“I didn’t even think about trying to find you,” she said levelly. “You’d made it quite clear you weren’t interested in any sort of involvement at all.”
“You could’ve —”
“No,” she said flatly. “I couldn’t.” She hesitated, then just told him the truth. “I was afraid you might want me to get an abortion.”
He stared at her, shocked. “How could you think—?”
“Why wouldn’t I?” she demanded. “You didn’t want to care! I was afraid you’d say, ‘Get rid of it before anyone cares.’ Well, I cared. Even then I cared!” She could feel tears stinging the back of her eyes.
“Jesus,” he muttered.
“Exactly,” Daisy said, understanding the desperation that made him say it. “I did a lot of praying. You can believe that. I was scared. I didn’t know how I was going to cope. I could keep working for Finn while I was pregnant, but after the baby came, I thought I might have to go back to Colorado and stay with my mother till I could work something out. And then—” she breathed deeply “—Cal proposed.”
“Your savior. He was just standing around, waiting in the wings, for exactly that moment?” Alex demanded bitterly. “Ready to take some other man’s woman?” Alex ground out. “His pregnant woman?”
“I was not your woman! And he was my friend. He is my friend.”
“And yet you couldn’t stay married to him,” Alex said derisively.
Her jaw tightened. “It didn’t work out.” She folded her hands in her lap.
“Why not?”
“That’s not your business.”
Alex scowled blackly. “He married you, then dumped you? It doesn’t make sense. None of it makes sense.”
“He didn’t dump me! And it made sense,” Daisy insisted. “We hoped it would work. We wanted it to work. Cal’s a good man,” she said, looking over at the photo on the mantel. She stared at it for a long moment, then turned her gaze and met Alex’s, smiling a little sadly. “He’s been a good father.”
“But not Charlie’s only father!” Alex insisted.
“He knows he has a biological father. Well, as much as any four-year-old understands that. He knows he has two fathers. I figured I could explain you more to him as he got older.”
“I’ll explain myself to him now.”
“No,” Daisy said. “Not until I know how you feel.”
“You know damn well how I feel. I want my son!”
Their gazes locked, dueled. And in the silence of battle, the stairs creaked.
“Mommy?”
Daisy’s head jerked up to see Charlie peering over the bannister halfway down them. Alex stared up at him, too. Dear God, had he heard?
Daisy hurried up the stairs and scooped him up into her arms. “What is it, sweetie?”
“My arm hurts,” he whimpered, and tucked his head between her jaw and her shoulder. He clung to her, but his gaze was fixed on Alex who was slowly coming to his feet.
Daisy shifted so that her body blocked his view. “I know.” She kissed his hair and cuddled him close. “I wish it didn’t. I’ll take you back upstairs and sing to you. Okay?”
Charlie nodded. “Can Alex come, too?”
“Alex was just leaving.” But she turned and carried Charlie down the stairs. “We’ll just say good-night and see him out the front door.” She smiled into Alex’s suddenly narrowed gaze. “That will be nice, won’t it?” she said to her son.
Solemnly Charlie nodded. He looked at Alex.
Alex looked back with an intensity that made Daisy quiver.
Then Charlie lifted his head off her shoulder. “Night, Alex.”
Daisy held her breath as, slowly, Alex shrugged into his suit jacket and crossed the room, stopping mere inches from them. He didn’t look at her. He had eyes only for Charlie. To Daisy he looked dark, forbidding and positively scary.
But then he lifted a hand to touch Charlie’s cheek and his expression softened, a smile touched the corner of his mouth. “Good night, son.”
IT was like waiting for the other shoe