out onto the balcony. He could see her hands gripping the railing as she fought not to confront her father. Despite Paulo insisting he wasn’t confused, he seemed to live between the long-ago past—when Rosa had been alive—and then the present, as if he had simply erased the damage that had been caused in between.
‘Scusi,’ Luka said to Paulo, and walked out to join her.
‘He gets confused,’ Luka said patiently.
‘He gets confused when it suits him.’
‘No,’ Luka said. ‘I don’t think he can reconcile what he has done. He needs to go home. I can see that now.’
‘No one will be talking to him, though,’ Sophie said. ‘Have you asked Matteo to be your groomsman?’
‘I have.’
‘And what did he say?’
‘That he’ll move things around so that he can be there.’
‘I want Bella there too.’
‘I’m not sure if that’s wise,’ Luka said. ‘Matteo will be with Shandy. You know a bit of what went down between him and Bella.’
‘I believe that it was Bella who went down,’ Sophie said. ‘And your friend paid for the pleasure.’
‘You don’t let a single thing go.’
‘You refused my offer of a clean slate,’ Sophie pointed out. ‘So tell your friend that, however uncomfortable Bella’s presence might make him, she’ll be there.’ She rubbed her temples and dragged in air. ‘I need to sort out some accommodation for us.’
‘That’s all sorted,’ Luka said.
‘How?’
‘Come on.’ Luka led her back inside then he addressed her father. ‘Paulo,’ he said in a very practical voice, ‘you will be tired after the ceremony. Perhaps we could have a few people back to your home...’
He gave a pale smile as Sophie let herself back in but then Paulo spoke. ‘I don’t have a home there any more.’
‘Yes, Paulo,’ Luka said, ‘you do. Since his death my lawyers have been sorting out the properties that my father acquired. You have your home to return to. It is all there, nothing has been changed. Angela has been taking care of it.’
For this gift to her father Sophie could almost forgive Luka for not loving her enough to remain in her life.
‘I have a home,’ Paulo sobbed. ‘Your mother’s dress will be there, Sophie. You can wear it for the wedding.’
‘No!’ It was Sophie who interrupted Paulo. ‘I’m not wearing my mother’s dress. I’m not my mother...’
‘Sophie, please,’ her father begged, but on this she stood firm.
‘I don’t want a replica of your marriage, Pa.’ She was caught between the truth and a lie. ‘I want our marriage to be different.’
She was torn, completely, as she walked out of the lounge and into the bedroom.
‘What was all that about?’ Luka asked, having followed her in. ‘I thought you were trying to give him the wedding of his dreams before he dies.’
‘Remember that you said if this was real, if we were in love...?’ Sophie turned the tables on him. ‘Then my father would know I would not be simply agreeing to everything. My father sees those times through rose-coloured glasses. If we really were marrying...’
‘Go on.’
‘What’s the point in going on?’ Sophie demanded. ‘Why should I tell you the wife and woman I want to be when you’re not even prepared to be there to find out? Why should I trust you with my dreams again when you won’t let me into your heart? You can have sex with me. Luka, you can be kind to me, you can argue with me if you must, but don’t ask for my private thoughts when we both know that you’re planning to walk away from me.’ She couldn’t continue speaking. ‘I’m going to Bella’s.’
‘We need to get organised for tomorrow.’
‘I am organised,’ Sophie said. ‘We have the church booked, we have your plane to take us. I’ll call Teresa and then I’m going out.’
It was amongst the hardest of calls she had ever made. Teresa was as cold and as hesitant as before, but, Sophie guessed, work was work for her and perhaps it was because of the mention of the Cavaliere name that Teresa agreed to cater back at the house for the wedding.
‘Grazie,’ Sophie said, and hung up.
She collected her bag from the bedroom and gave her father a kiss on the cheek.
‘How long will you be?’ Paulo asked.
‘You’ll be in bed by the time I’m back.’ Sophie smiled. ‘I’ll see you in the morning. Just think, Pa, this time tomorrow you’ll be back in Bordo Del Cielo. You can sleep well tonight, dreaming of that. I love you so much.’
It was getting harder and harder to say goodnight, never knowing if this would be the last time.
She went over and gave Luka the necessary kiss. ‘Soon,’ Sophie said, as she lowered her head and kissed his mouth then whispered into his ear, ‘we’ll be living apart...’
‘What time will you be back?’ Luka asked.
‘You’re not my husband yet.’ Sophie smiled with her lips but not with her eyes and then she moved her mouth to his ear. ‘Dawn,’ she whispered, ‘so, as said, you can sleep well.’
She could not stand another night spent next to a man she could never have so she headed to the door, but Luka followed her out.
‘The plane leaves at seven.’
‘I’ll be back well before then.’
‘Tonight might be our last chance to talk...’
‘What’s the point?’ Sophie said. ‘There’s nothing left to say. We both know what you’re going to do to me. You’re wrong, Luka, I’m not fourteen, you don’t have to prise me from you knee. I’ll be at the church, and if you’re not...’ Sophie shrugged. ‘I’ll survive. I’ve had an awful lot of practice.’
She held it together until she made it to the apartment and only there, with Bella, did she finally let her guard down.
‘He says he wishes he’d never loved me.’
‘At least you have known love... Better to have—’
‘Don’t,’ Sophie warned. ‘If you start quoting Tennyson, I’ll scream!
‘Who’s Tennyson?’
‘I don’t really know,’ Sophie said, ‘but I don’t think he understood the heart...’
But maybe he did, because the thought of never having known Luka’s love filled her with dread.
‘He’s going to jilt me.’
‘More fool him,’ Bella said.
‘And I had a bit of an argument with my father. He wants me to wear my mother’s wedding dress and I said no. I don’t want a marriage like theirs.’
‘I’m already making your dress,’ Bella said. ‘I guessed that this might happen when Luka agreed to get engaged so I’ve already started it. I kept some money back from our savings and I bought some chiffon from the market. I will work on it through the night.
‘I’m going to be there with you, Sophie.’
‘No.’ Sophie shook her head because despite her brave words to Luka she could not put her friend through that. ‘You have to work, and anyway...’
‘Anyway?’
‘Matteo