baby should have remained in her nursery, safe and warm; surely she could sense the distress and sorrow in the chapel. But no one had advised Mrs. Murdock. After all, there was no housekeeper, and Grenville had only returned moments before the service had started.
How could he be so negligent?
The infant hiccupped and looked at her. Then she smiled.
Amelia cried out, delighted. “She is smiling! Oh, how pretty she is!”
“Do you have any of your own?” Mrs. Murdock asked.
Amelia felt some of her pleasure vanish. She was too old to marry, and she would never have a child of her own. The knowledge caused some sadness, but she wasn’t about to indulge in self-pity. “No, I do not.” She looked up and saw Lucas and her mother approaching.
Lucas’s mouth softened. “I wondered how long it would take you to put the babe in your arms.” He spoke with affection.
“Oh, what a beautiful child,” Momma said. “Is she your first?”
Amelia sighed. Momma didn’t recognize her, but that was hardly unusual. She introduced her brother and mother to the governess, then turned to Lucas. “Could you take Momma home and then send the carriage back? I am going to stay for a bit. I want to settle the baby and the boys.”
His gaze narrowed. “I know you are merely being kind, but is that wise?”
She did not have a clue as to what he might mean.
He took her arm and steered her a short distance away from the boys. “Grenville seemed rather unhinged.” There was warning in his tone.
“What on earth does that mean? Of course he is grief-stricken. But I am not attending St. Just.” She kept her voice to a whisper. “He is so distraught he left his sons by themselves. Let me get everyone settled, Lucas. I simply must help out.”
He shook his head, but he smiled. “Then you can expect Garrett back in two hours.” His smile faded. “I hope you do not regret this, Amelia.”
Her heart lurched. “Why would I regret helping those small boys? Or this beautiful child?”
He kissed her cheek and they returned to the group. Momma was babbling on about a debut, and Amelia winced as Lucas gently led her away. Mrs. Murdock gave her a wide-eyed look as they started toward the house. “Momma is addled,” Amelia said softly. “It is rare, indeed, when she is coherent and cognizant of her surroundings.”
“I am so sorry,” Mrs. Murdock said.
The huge rosewood door was ahead, set back within the temple entrance of the house. Amelia felt herself tense. It had been ten years since she had set foot within the house.
And suddenly she recalled darting into the library, with Simon in pursuit. She had been laughing, and they had wound up on the sofa in a passionate embrace.
She hesitated inside the high-ceilinged entry hall, a circular room with marble floors, gilded furniture and crystal chandeliers. Did she genuinely wish to go inside?
“Will you really come upstairs?” William asked, jerking her back into the present.
Her heart leaped oddly. It almost felt dangerous, being in Grenville’s house. But she smiled, rocking the infant gently. The children needed her; she had no doubt. “Do you want me to come upstairs?”
“I am happy to show you our suite of rooms,” William said gravely, sounding like an adult.
“I have a soldier,” John announced with pride. “He’s a Prussian infant.”
Amelia smiled as William said, taking John’s hand, “He’s a Prussian infantryman. You can show Miss Greystone all of your soldiers, if she so wishes.” He looked at Amelia, and she saw the eagerness in his eyes.
“I cannot wait,” she said, smiling. And for the first time since she met him, William smiled back.
* * *
THE BABY HAD finally fallen asleep after nursing hungrily, while still in Amelia’s arms. Amelia had no wish to let her go, but she could hardly linger with Elizabeth’s child now. Smiling but saddened, Amelia stood and laid the sleeping infant in her crib, a beautiful affair furnished with white eyelet coverlets. As she covered her tiny body with a white patchwork quilt, she said softly, “She needs a name.”
“You are so good with children!” Mrs. Murdock exclaimed. “I have never seen her nurse as greedily, and the boys adore you when you have only just met!”
Amelia smiled. The boys were playing with the toy soldiers in their rooms. John had shown her every single solider that he had. “She was hungry.”
“No, she loves you already!” The governess sobered. “There has been too much turmoil in this household. I so wish you were not leaving us.”
Amelia started. “I have my own family to attend,” she said, but she wondered if Mrs. Murdock was right. Had the grief and upheaval in the house affected the infant? How could it not? But at least the blue-and-white nursery was a quiet sanctuary for the child. Clearly, Elizabeth had been hoping for another boy.
Mrs. Murdock sat down in a large blue-striped chair. “I am surprised that you do not have children of your own, Miss Greystone.”
Amelia felt herself tense. Of course there was dismay, after taking care of that beautiful baby. “I am not married, Mrs. Murdock, and as you have seen, I have my mother to take care of.”
“You could certainly take care of her and a husband,” Mrs. Murdock said. She seemed far too curious for comfort. “You are so pretty, if you do not mind my saying so. How could you be unwed?”
An image of Grenville, so dark and handsome, his stare impossibly direct, came immediately to mind.
Why had he looked at her that way?
And what could she say? That she had fallen foolishly in love with St. Just a decade ago, only to have her heart broken? There had been a few offers afterward, but none had interested her. Very carefully, she said, “There was someone once, long ago. He was not serious, and I was too young to realize it.”
“The cad!” Mrs. Murdock cried.
“Let us leave the subject for now. What’s done is done, after all.” She smiled firmly. “I am glad the boys are playing. I am glad they ate—and I am glad the baby nursed and quieted down. I imagine she will sleep for some time.”
“Thank you so much for your help,” Mrs. Murdock said, standing. But she seemed anxious. “Are you leaving?”
“I have to go.”
She grimaced. “What should I do if he comes here?”
It took Amelia a moment to understand. “Do you mean, if Grenville comes to see his child?”
She wrung her hands. “Maybe he won’t come. He doesn’t seem to like this child.”
“He will love this child, as he does his sons!” Amelia exclaimed, entirely distressed by such an unfounded accusation.
“He frightens me!”
Amelia started, “Mrs. Murdock, he is your employer and the Earl of St. Just. I suppose he is somewhat intimidating—”
The governess cut her off. “He frightens all of us. He frightened her ladyship!”
Amelia stiffened with displeasure. “Mrs. Murdock, I must object to such a discussion. I am sure that Lady Grenville held his lordship in the highest regard, and it was a mutual matter!”
“She changed whenever he was home. She was a happy woman—except when he was in residence. She worried about his returning. She told me how much she worried—she told me that she always seemed to displease him!”
Amelia sat abruptly down. Could this be possible? Could their marriage have been so strained? “I cannot abide gossip,”