good. I’m not letting it affect me. I’m totally over it,” Alex said. Which probably wasn’t the best thing to say. It implied that she had, in recent memory, not been over it.
“I don’t like what I’m hearing…or not hearing, Alex.” Molly’s voice quivered. “Men can be such trouble.”
“Men can wreck your life if you let them,” Jayne said.
“But I’m strong. I know Wyatt isn’t available, and I won’t let anyone wreck my life.” Including me, Alex thought.
“But Wyatt kissed you…” Molly prompted.
“Yes, but only in a lustful way, not a romantic way. It was—” the most intimate, expert kiss she’d ever had “—it was nice, but I’m safe. I’m not getting involved.”
“You’re repeating yourself, Alex. And somehow I don’t feel better after this conversation,” Jayne said.
“I do. I miss you guys. For your sakes as much as mine, I’ll do a lot of counting to ten,” Alex promised.
Her friends smiled. “If you need us, we’ve got your back.”
“Thanks, you two. I’ll get in touch with Serena.”
Alex hung up the phone. Talking to her friends was a bit like talking to a mom these days. She loved them, she missed them, and she didn’t dare tell them everything. If she did…
“They would worry themselves sick,” she muttered. Just the way she was worrying about them.
Alex was particularly worried about Serena, so when her friend called and suggested that they meet at Hennesey’s, an Irish pub, Alex jumped.
“I can’t believe you’re back here in Las Vegas,” Alex said. “It’s wonderful.”
“It’s so good seeing you,” Serena agreed, which wasn’t exactly the same thing. How was she feeling about being married? “Come on, let’s move outdoors. The music’s great, but I want to be able to hear what’s happened to you.”
“What’s happened to me?” Alex launched into a description of some of the projects she’d started at the hotel.
“Jayne and Molly said that you and your boss kissed.Alex…”
“Serena…” Alex said, duplicating her friend’s tone. “Or should I call you Mrs. Benjamin?”
Serena blinked. Then she laughed. “Okay, we’re even—and aren’t we a pair? How did life ever get this complicated?”
“I guess we came to Las Vegas and started a few things we hadn’t anticipated starting.” Alex took a sip of her drink as the lilting strains of music floated out on the breeze. “Do you love him, Serena? Does he love you?”
Serena hesitated. “It’s…I’m not sure how this is all going to play out. How about you? How do you feel about Wyatt kissing you? I’m always interested to hear more about the virile one.”
Alex laughed. “Let’s just say that Wyatt could make a living giving kissing lessons if this hotel gig doesn’t pan out. Still, it shouldn’t have happened, and we’ve gotten beyond it.”
Later, after Serena had opened up and talked about her husband, Jonas, just enough so that Alex was really worried about her friend’s chances of ever having a happily-ever-after, Alex drove back to McKendrick’s.
Had she really said that she’d gotten beyond the kiss with Wyatt? When did I become such a liar? she thought. And why was she lying to her friends?
Wyatt needed to get away. For the past two weeks he’d been measuring his every action, his motivations, his words. He should never have kissed Alex, because each time he got near her now, his entire body reacted. He envisioned her in his arms and in his bed, and it was time to put a stop to that. He needed to remember what he was all about…and what he was not about. He had to go somewhere away from the hotel and the world as he knew it. A place where there was no chance of glancing over to see what was going on with Alex. Because she wouldn’t be there.
He was dressed casually, unusual for him, and as he walked toward the entrance, several women smiled and said hello.
As always he was polite, but no more. He dated only casually, and he kept the hotel and his personal life separate. Maybe because the hotel meant more to him than anyone he’d ever dated had. His success in business didn’t carry over to the rest of his life. After walking away from numerous women, he had realized that he didn’t have the basic emotional tools to fall in love and maintain a relationship. That part of him had died long ago. Or maybe it had never existed.
Growing up, solitude, hiding, had saved him from beatings and abuse. He’d always been alone, because when he was young it had been the only way. And now?
It was still the only way. He’d never been able to make the leap to love, could never let anyone inside his walls, and he always ended up hurting some innocent woman. That made him loathe himself for being such a cold beast, so solitude was the life for him. Forever.
Normally he was fine with that, and today, as usual, he was on his own. He drove to the one place in Las Vegas where he didn’t have to maintain his image. The Haven was an old motel with cottages and a small chapel, a rundown bit of property he’d bought a few years ago with the idea of fixing it up. But for some reason he never had. It was a place that drew him. Usually he could relax and lose himself in solitude there…except today he couldn’t.
Lounging in a chair inside the one cottage where he’d made minimal improvements, he tried to read. And put down his book. Once. Twice. Three times.
“It’s her,” he said aloud, glancing at the red rocks in the distance, but seeing pretty blue eyes. Wyatt groaned. “I have to stop thinking of her,” he muttered.
Because nothing had changed. He didn’t want a relationship, and she’d been hurt in her relationships. She wanted a home. He didn’t even live in a home. He had no knowledge of a real home. But what was she doing right now?
Most likely she was at her desk, very efficiently managing his guests. Issues with some of those visitors might be arising. And, even though it wasn’t her job to handle customer disputes, some of his employees had been going to Alex lately if he wasn’t available. Her ability to make people feel good, the way she smoothed things over easily, had people bending the rules. When he was at hand no one did that, but when he wasn’t…
Wyatt slammed the book closed. Maybe he should have brought Alex with him. He wondered what she would think of the Haven.
She’d probably think it was a decrepit pile of rock and wood that needed to be torn down. She’d think less of him then. And that would effectively kill his fascination with her.
Next time, he promised himself. Next time he’d bring Alex. But for now…
“Rest time’s over, McKendrick.”
She should be feeling better about how her day was going, Alex conceded. She’d come up with two new activities to make McKendrick’s stand out from the crowd. And, despite the fact that there’d been an article in the local paper yesterday about Champagne sponsoring some sort of exclusive event this weekend, the crowds at McKendrick’s were just as big as ever. People looked relaxed and happy. She’d had nothing but good vibes from those approaching her desk this morning.
She’d hardly even noticed that Wyatt had left two hours ago, taking some rare time off, she told herself. Despite the fact that the hotel seemed emptier without him around, she was okay with that…wasn’t she? It was normal to feel a little different when there was a change in one’s routine.
Of course she had noticed that a few women gave him hopeful waves as he left. She’d even wondered if there might be another woman sharing his day off, and felt a stabbing pain near her heart, but she’d forced herself to try to ignore it.
She was