to trade places with him? And then how am I supposed to convince Tina that I’m The Bandit? We’ve been together before.”
“Just as long as the alcohol keeps flowing, she won’t be as sharp as usual. As for the costume, just offer bandit boy a couple of hundred dollars for the leather straps and mask. He’ll probably jump at the opportunity to make a fast buck. If you’re wearing that mask, she’ll never see who she’s really with. This is the moment when all the extra time you’ve put in at the gym trying to forget her pays off.”
Tyler grabbed the iron railing in a hard grip. While he usually trusted Nelson’s judgment, this was outrageous. “This is nuts.” Tyler ran his fingers through his hair. “It’s playing with her life, real life, and she’ll probably hate me in the morning.”
Assuming I can pull off being a stripper.
Nelson fiddled with his watch. “I don’t think it’s a huge risk. Tina likes a little spice in her life. She might be intrigued enough to give you another shot, or she might be aroused enough to keep you busy for the rest of the weekend. Or…”
“Or?”
“Or she might give you a black eye.”
“She might do more than give me a black eye. She’s certainly the toughest woman I’ve ever met.” Tyler rubbed his face as if he could already feel the bruises. “Yeah, can’t figure why you’ve got it so badly for her, other than the body, I mean. She’s earned her reputation.”
“You mean The Shark thing? She’s an enigma, that’s for sure—a woman who looks like a debutante and swears like a soldier,” Tyler mused. “I remember when she actually stared down a client’s abusive husband who confronted her with a gun outside of the courtroom. Next day, she waltzed with the governor at a fund-raiser, and got her picture in the paper. She’s amazing.”
“So she’s tough, and she cleans up nicely. My assistant claims she spends a fortune to get her hair done. She’s catty.”
“Which one?” Tyler asked.
Nelson chortled. “Both of them. Beth’s overfed and grumpy. And Tina, she’s like a sleek little Egyptian cat. But her claws are lethal.”
Tyler shrugged. “What’s interesting about being sweet and nice?”
“She’s as hard as they come. No softer emotions. I just don’t find that especially attractive in a woman.”
Tyler barely paid attention to Nelson’s observations. Everyone said the same thing: Tina was a fantastic lawyer, and a hell of a lay, for those lucky enough to have been singled out, but not sympathetic, and certainly not relationship material. But people were his specialty, and he saw something in her that she tried hard to hide. Call it vulnerability. Call it bravado. The woman had serious depth.
“There’s more to her than meets the eye. Some of her clients are real charity cases, which means she isn’t representing everyone just for the money. There’s another motivation. One I don’t understand yet.”
“So she takes on pro bono. Everyone decent does. But you never see her clients turn to her and give her a hug.”
“No, she definitely doesn’t invite hugs.” Tyler grinned. He didn’t know why he found it amusing, the way Tina intimidated everyone. He had a feeling she worked at it. “She’s fascinating, full of contradictions. She’s the most amazing puzzle. Where does she come from? And why is she so scary?”
“Hey, I’m not knocking her. She’s a fantastic lawyer.” Nelson ran his hand over his thinning hair. “And I have an ulterior motive. I’m confident that when you get to see her as much as you want, you’ll eventually get tired of her. Just like all the other women you’ve dated. Then maybe you’ll stop moping. I was the one who encouraged you to go on that cruise, so I feel obligated to help you out now.”
“I do not mope.”
“Could have fooled me.”
“I’m just confused. I’ve never been tied in knots by a woman, didn’t even know what it meant.”
“You don’t have to stay confused. Do some research, run a background check. That ought to solve the mystery that is Tina Henderson so you can get on with your life. And I can get on with mine.” Nelson tipped his head toward the doors.
“That wouldn’t be sporting. The kind of research I want to do is up close and personal. I want her to tell me everything with her hair spread out on my pillow.”
“That sounds like the old you—I guess there’s hope for you yet. Maybe you should follow her around. Find out what she’s doing. James Bond stuff.”
Tyler turned and his eyes met Tina’s cool, assessing gaze as if there weren’t a room, a crowd, and a piece of glass between them. Then she dismissed him to look back at the stripper.
He knew he would never get to Tina by normal means: flowers, candy or romance, the things that all the other women in his life had wanted.
Not Tina. He’d tried everything from roses to orchids. He’d sent tickets for opera performances and basketball games. She’d even sent back the little lawyer bear he’d had made especially for her. For once in his life, something hadn’t fallen into place. She hadn’t gone out with him since the night she’d let him stay over at her place.
He couldn’t stop thinking about her. She was the one challenge he hadn’t mastered. She’d barely given him a chance. So what did he have to lose? Just his reputation and his pride. “It’s a crazy idea, me impersonating a stripper. Can you imagine what would happen if anyone ever found out?”
“You can’t be disbarred for fulfilling a sexual fantasy in the privacy of a hotel room.”
“She’ll laugh at me.”
“I don’t think she has your sense of humor. Either she’ll be intrigued, or angry.” Nelson put his hand on Tyler’s arm. “Look, she can’t afford to make it public that she intended to take a stripper to bed, any more than you can afford to be caught impersonating a stripper. She might kick you in the balls, but that won’t damage your career as a lawyer, though maybe your career as a stripper.” He chuckled.
Maybe Nelson was right, maybe it would take something wild and crazy to get her attention. And Tyler definitely wanted her attention—which was a new situation for him.
Tyler looked back into the room where another one of the women gave out a gasping scream as The Bandit grabbed and fondled her breast through her dress.
“Technically, he’s not supposed to touch them.”
“He’s definitely gonna touch her if you don’t do something about it. She has that predatory look.”
Tyler turned to Nelson. “Can you catch this guy when he goes to the bathroom? Offer him a thousand dollars for the getup.”
“A thousand? Man, are you crazy?”
Tyler just looked at him.
“Yeah, I guess you are, and at least you’re good for it.” Nelson put a hand on Tyler’s shoulder. “In the meantime, keep both Sheila and Peggy warm for me.”
Tyler grimaced. “I only agreed to come along with Sheila so I could get close to Tina. Guess that makes me a louse.”
Nelson smiled. “Makes you human, man, but it’s my guess Tina intends to take the stripper to her room tonight, and the only reason she’s sticking around is to flaunt what she’s got lined up for the evening. If you’re flaunting, too, it’s going to get very interesting.”
Tyler tightened his hand on the balcony rail, which felt very solid beneath his fingers, an anchor of sorts. “You know this is crazy, don’t you? I’ve never done anything this crazy, even in college.”
“You only live once, so a little crazy isn’t a bad thing.”
Tyler