any guy I picked up at a party.’ Like Todd.
‘Are you sleeping with him?’
She jerked upright. Forget calm, forget irritated, now she was angry. ‘Is that any of your business?’
‘My God, you are. It’s been what. days?’
‘Careful, Jared. Glass houses.’ She fought for composure; she didn’t want to argue long-distance.
There was a long pause. ‘He’s not going to hang around for long, honey. He’s buying himself a boat. Are you prepared for that?’
She knew. And she’d never be prepared. The heartache would come and the knowledge stabbed at her. She wished she’d thought to bring a drink with her to wash away the dry taste in her mouth. ‘I know all that. I’m not a kid.’
‘A man like Blake is not the settling-in-one-place kind of guy. He—’
‘Oh, for heaven’s sakes, didn’t you ever have a fling in your life? One wild, crazy no-strings affair with no unrealistic expectations?’ Then she frowned, remembering he’d been too busy being a parent to her, and said quietly, ‘No, I guess you didn’t.’
‘Is that what this is?’
She blinked back a sudden moisture, already storing memories of Blake in her heart. ‘What else would it be?’ What else could it be? She gave a light laugh for Jared’s benefit, but it came out loud, brittle and over-bright. ‘You know me. Always busy. Too busy for anything more and that’s not going to change any time soon.’ The world’s worst fibber. ‘Don’t worry, he’ll be gone and it’ll be over before you know it.’
‘What about the business?’ he said. ‘I hope you—’
‘Of course. Priority number one, but, as I used to tell you often enough, all work and no play.’
‘Just. look after yourself.’
‘Always.’
‘We love you.’ Gruff and stern. Not happy. Not happy at all.
‘Love you too.’ She did. She really did. But she forced a sunny-as-you-go smile into her voice. ‘Bye for now.’
She disconnected, leaned back and closed her eyes, moisture clinging to her lashes. Let him get used to the idea. No surprises when he came home from overseas.
Blake might already be gone by then.
Relax. Breathe. Don’t let Blake see you like this.
So while she got her emotions under control she reminded herself of the conversation and why she needed to listen to her head and not her heart. She didn’t need Jared to tell her Blake wasn’t the right man for her. Not long term.
She’d want too much from him—already wanted too much—and an ongoing relationship with a man who lived a million miles away on a boat just wouldn’t work. It was vital for her own well-being that she accepted their liaison for what it was and lived the next few weeks accordingly.
A short-term affair.
Blake leaned a shoulder against the open doorway and watched Lissa through narrowed eyes. He couldn’t see her face from this angle but she’d disconnected and stretched out as if she didn’t have a care in the world.
He’d been about to step outside when he’d heard her spill the status of their relationship to her brother.
He’ll be gone and it’ll be over before you know it. He’d seen the flip of her hand as she said it. Chuckled it even.
Amused and casual about it all, was she? She’d been anything but amused and casual last night, he remembered darkly.
She’d told it how it was—fun and games for as long as it lasted. A wild, crazy no-strings affair, he’d heard her tell Jared.
That was what Blake wanted too, he told himself. And what better way to de-stress than a fling with a gorgeous, fun-loving woman who knew where they stood? It had always worked before.
So why did he feel as if he’d been trussed with barbed wire and tossed overboard into a storm-ravaged sea?
He was a navy man, he reminded himself. He knew how to swim. Tension coiling through every muscle in his body, he pushed off the door frame. ‘Food’s cooked,’ he said. ‘You about ready to eat?’
She jumped at his voice and scrambled upright. ‘Sure am.’ Facing away from him, deliberately, he guessed, she rose, all loose-limbed grace, and stared at the tangerine-smeared sky.
‘I never tire of this view.’
‘Me neither,’ he agreed, willing to stand there for however long it took and watch her with the balmy breeze carrying her scent to his nose and the languid sound of a clarinet drifting from a house across the river.
Then she turned and she was smiling and the force of it hit him smack in the chest. He rubbed a hand over the tender spot, then said, ‘I’ll miss it when I go.’
Her smile remained but something in her eyes changed. His words had hit their intended target and he wished he’d kept his mouth shut. He wished he knew what she was feeling.
He wished to hell he knew if he was the only one suffering the same gut-rending, devastating force that held him motionless.
Rubbing her upper arms, she glanced away over her shoulder, as if a chill were stalking her. ‘It’s gorgeous outside. Why don’t we eat by the pool?’
They shared a bottle of white wine with their meal as the violet dusk settled into night and the insects chittered. He lit the tea candles he’d brought out with them so he could enjoy the way the light glinted on the gold highlights in her auburn hair.
He didn’t pay much attention to their conversation. He was too distracted by the sound of her voice and the way her hands moved as she talked and his own thoughts racing inside his head.
Until she said, ‘Gilda was telling me how you saved her life. She had other good things to say about you too.’
Thanks a lot, Gil. What he didn’t need right now was to have his life dissected, however well intentioned. The less Lissa knew, the less involved she’d be when he left. ‘I just did what anyone would have done.’
She spread her hands on the table. ‘I guess you’ve saved a lot of lives over your time in the navy.’
He shifted, uncomfortable with the conversation, and poured himself another glass of wine, drank half of it straight down. ‘It goes with the job.’
‘And do you—did you—like your job?’
‘It has its moments.’ He’d been thinking a lot about that over the past couple of weeks. He’d reached his personal horizon as far as the navy was concerned. It had been time to leave and plot a new course for his life.
‘So why did you join the navy?’
‘I always loved the sea. Its vastness. The solitude.’
‘Solitude? In a navy vessel?’ She grinned.
‘Yeah, okay, you got me there.’
‘I still remember when you left. Here one day, gone the next.’
He shook his head. ‘Not quite but it might have seemed that way.’
‘Heartbreaker,’ she murmured. ‘I cried for a week.’
He stared at her, remembering the young teenager and felt. odd. He was still uncomfortable by the whole idea that she’d more than likely projected her sexual fantasies onto him, a guy nine years her senior. ‘You did not.’
She lifted a shoulder. ‘Okay, maybe it was only a couple of days, but I might have if I… Not after. Never mind,’ she finished quietly. ‘It’s not important.’
And