focused on his mother’s face. Would she understand? How could she? Thomas wasn’t sure he understood what he was doing himself. “I feel like I need to marry her. I’ve asked the Lord to have His way and He hasn’t given me any signs or feelings to make me change my mind.” Thomas pushed his plate back.
In a soft voice Rebecca asked, “Do you love her?”
Thomas wanted to laugh but didn’t. “Love her? No, I haven’t known her long enough to love her.”
“I see.” The frown on her face indicated that she didn’t approve.
He shook his head. “Josephine doesn’t love me, either, Ma. It is to be a marriage in name only. She needs an escape, and since Philip sent for her, I feel obligated to marry her.”
Rebecca pushed out of her chair. She walked to her teapot and poured herself a cup of tea. “Mark my words, one of these days, Thomas, your soft heart is going to get the best of you. I just hope this isn’t that time.” She paused, then continued, “Why doesn’t Philip marry her?”
Thomas shook his head. “Josephine doesn’t trust him and who can blame her. And Philip says he’s not the marrying kind.”
He carried his plate and bowl to the washtub, then poured himself a cup of coffee. Thomas sighed. “I know it isn’t normal to marry like this, but when I look at her and see how afraid she is, I feel that I have to help her.”
Rebecca cradled her cup in her hands. Her eyes betrayed the worry she felt. “What happens after her uncle finds out she’s married? Once he realizes he can’t force her to marry, will you stay married?”
“I’m not sure, but until I do know, I’d like to keep this between you and me.” Thomas drained his coffee. “And Philip, of course.”
“You don’t want the family to know you are getting married?” Rebecca shook her head. “I don’t know, son.”
“Please, Ma. I just don’t want them to know until Josephine and I have had time to decide how we are going to handle her uncle. Then we’ll get married and tell everyone.” He searched her face.
Rebecca returned his gaze. “All right. I feel the family should know that you are getting married and be able to attend.”
He put the cup in the washtub with the other dirty dishes. Then Thomas walked to her and enfolded her in his arms. “I understand your feelings, Ma.” Another yawn escaped him and he laughed. “I really need to get a couple of hours’ sleep and then head home.”
Joy ran into the room. She stopped just inside the door. “Now, Ma? Please. Now can I talk to Thomas? I’ve missed him so much.”
Thomas knew he’d not get any sleep for a while. Fay and Emma followed Joy into the room. He would enjoy his family and worry about sleeping later.
He released Rebecca and nodded his consent to stay and visit with Joy, Fay and Emma. Rebecca’s eyes expressed the worry she felt for him. Would Seth and his brothers feel the same way as Rebecca? Or would they understand his odd feelings of protectiveness toward the young woman?
* * *
Josephine slipped out the kitchen door into the backyard. The water well stood several feet away and she walked slowly to it. So far Hazel hadn’t noticed that she’d left the house. After spending three days indoors, Josephine relished the fresh air, even if it was icy cold.
Her fingers were sore from sewing the quilt blocks she and Hazel had begun piecing together. Working on the fabric had helped to keep her busy, but still she’d longed to be outdoors.
She loved the way the log cabin quilt was shaping up. Hazel had said that the red fabric came from one of her late husband’s shirts. It was fitting that the red was the center of each block, since Hazel said her husband had been the center of her world for as long as she could remember.
Josephine hadn’t asked Hazel for more details than that. The older woman’s eyes had teared up, so Josephine had changed the subject. It was obvious that Hazel had loved her husband very much. What did a person do to have a love like that? Was there some formula? Could it be a family secret passed down through the generations? Aggravation twisted her gut. A girl should have a mama to instruct her in things of this nature.
She leaned against the cold stone of the well and sighed. Thoughts of her future husband filled her mind. Would she ever be able to trust him enough to have that type of love? Josephine shook her head. Probably not. Her distrust of men ran too deep, and Josephine knew that her heart couldn’t take it if Thomas decided this marriage wasn’t for him.
Her eyes searched the road. Darkness kept her from seeing past the barn. Thomas should have been back this morning, but as the day had worn on and the evening shadows lengthened, Josephine realized he wasn’t coming. She sighed again.
“That bad, huh?”
Josephine jumped at the sound of Thomas’s voice and gave a small squeal. Her hand covered her heart. “You pert nigh scared the life outta me.” She protested a little louder than she’d intended.
He rested his arms along the rim of the well. “You were so deep in thought, your uncle could have walked right up to you.”
The accusing tone of his voice set her teeth on edge. She wasn’t a child and she didn’t need him reminding her of the danger she’d put herself into coming out for fresh air. “Thankfully, you aren’t him.” Josephine looked out into the darkness, lightened only by the white of the snow.
Thomas laughed softly. “You have spunk, Josephine Dooly. I’ve never heard of a woman riding the Pony Express. And now here I find you outside when you know it could be dangerous.”
Josephine turned her gaze back on him. Had she misheard him a few moments ago? The warmth in his laugh drew her like a kitten to fresh milk. Was she so used to her uncle treating her like a child that she expected Thomas to treat her the same way? She searched his face. “You aren’t angry with me.”
“No, I’m not. I am concerned that you take risks, but I am not your keeper. You can come and go as you wish.” He pushed away from the well. “I came by to tell you that tomorrow we’ll go into town and get married, if you still wish to do so.”
Josephine exhaled. “I do, but what about my uncle?”
“I’ve been thinking on that. I don’t think there is anything he can do after we’re married. And as your new husband, I will keep you safe.”
Relief filled her. “Thank you.” She swallowed.
He nodded. “Can I walk you back inside?”
A longing to stay out in the fresh air battled with wanting to please him and go inside. The cold air nipped at her cheeks, helping her to make the decision. Josephine nodded and led the short distance back to the house.
His boots crunched through the snow as he followed her to the kitchen door. She stepped up on the porch but then turned to face him. He deserved an apology and she didn’t want to offer it in front of Hazel. As it stood right now, she would have to apologize to the older woman, too. “I’m sorry. I should have done as you asked and stayed inside.”
He reached up and brushed a wayward curl from her face. “I understand your need to come outside. I’m not sure I could stay inside for three whole days, either.”
The light touch of his fingers against her cheek surprised Josephine. Her gaze met his. Dark circles surrounded his eyes. Had he rested or come straight to her after his run? She felt the urge to lean her face into his warm palm. He smiled and pulled his hand away. Thomas yawned. “I best be heading back to the house. I’ll see you tomorrow.”
As he turned to leave, Josephine called out, “Thomas.”
He stopped and searched her face.
“I’m glad you are home.” She smiled as her mind went blank. She could think of no more words to retain him.