Except Madison had no interest in changing her ways at this late date. She did what she could to get through the last month of the year, closed her eyes as she passed the festive trees and lights, and then breathed a sigh of relief once the calendar rolled over into a new year.
Fingering the thick file folder on her desk, she flipped it open to the first page, where Ivy’s vital statistics were listed in bold clinical letters. The child was far wiser than her five years. And she saw things Theo probably didn’t even know she was aware of. Or maybe his daughter had already shared her longing with him. Madison didn’t think so, though.
She knew he was widowed, from the hospital grapevine. And his ring finger no longer held a wedding ring, so he’d gotten over the loss. Or had he? Some people never really got over that kind of life change.
Another thing Madison could relate to. Although her loss had nothing to do with a husband, or even a boyfriend.
Shaking herself free of her funk, she pulled the notebook from her pocket and dropped it onto her desk. She’d have to figure out a way to get a few of the things on Ivy’s list without making her dad suspicious. Or angry. He had to know how fortunate he was to have a daughter who was worried as much about him as he worried about her. She was small and so very ill, and yet her determination to do all she could to get better—for her dad’s sake—was one of the most touching things Madison had seen in a long time.
She flipped the first page open and perused the list, forcing her glance to leap over that first item. The rest of the things ranged from sweet to hilarious.
A new stethoscope—in purple, if Santa has one, because that is Ivy’s favorite color.
A book about horses so he’ll fall in love with them like she has.
An adult coloring book. One of Ivy’s nurses talked about how every grown-up should have one.
Somehow, Madison couldn’t picture those big hands clutching a crayon—although he was very much a paint-by-numbers type of person. No coloring outside the lines for him.
Macaroni and cheese. Evidently Theo’s favorite food. Santa must carry casseroles around in his toy sack.
A puppy. Ha! Wouldn’t Theo love coming home to find a puppy under the tree.
That was all they had so far on the list. Except for that very first thing. Her eyes tracked up to it against their will.
Make Daddy love Christmas.
God, even the real Santa would have a tough time granting that wish. The rest was doable. Well, maybe not the puppy. But everything else could be gotten for a relatively inexpensive price, wrapped and listed as being from Santa.
Why did she even care? She wasn’t here to buy anyone gifts. Or to make a little girl happy.
She was here to help solve difficult diagnoses. That was it. And to fulfill a lifelong dream of visiting the UK. She should be on cloud nine. Instead, she felt itchy and slightly uncomfortable, like wearing a new wool sweater without anything else beneath it.
You need to get out and see more of England. Staying around this hospital day in and day out isn’t healthy.
But there was something about Ivy...
She’d found herself spending more and more time with the little girl, almost succeeding in convincing herself it was to help figure out the child’s condition. Except she knew it was a lie. She was here for Ivy, even if being around her dad made her squirm in discomfort.
She wasn’t exactly sure why that was, but she’d better figure it out before she did something stupid. Really stupid. Like wish Ivy were hers, maybe?
She stood in a rush and clasped her hands behind her back, lifting them away from her body while bending forward at the waist, hoping the resultant stretch would help clear her head of its current thoughts. Higher and harder she stretched, vaguely aware of her door opening with a couple of light taps.
“Dr. Archer?”
Madison froze in place. Oh, Lordy. But at least the voice was female and not the man who’d jerked away from her a couple of hours earlier. How humiliating had that been? She’d just been trying to help.
Letting her arms drop back to her sides, she stood and saw Naomi Collins, one of the physical therapists at the hospital. Her romance with pediatric surgeon Finn Morgan was the stuff dreams were made of.
“Hi. Sorry about that. I had a kink in my neck and was trying to work it out.” More like a kink in her head, but it was pretty much the same thing.
Naomi chuckled. “It’s fine. You should see the things I do when I’m alone.” Another laugh. “Forget I said that. I didn’t mean that quite the way it sounded.”
“I didn’t think it sounded odd at all.” She smiled to reassure her. After all, if Naomi could have gotten a good look at what was rattling around in her head, she might be a little more than shocked. “Can I help you with something?”
“I just wanted to talk with you about Ivy. What you wanted me to work on with her tomorrow.”
With her clear complexion and deep gorgeous skin tones, Naomi was beautiful. And she was a huge hit with all her young charges, including Ivy.
“I’m not her only doctor, you know.”
Naomi entered the office and closed the door behind her. “Maybe not, but right now everyone—if they’re smart—is deferring to you and hoping you’ll solve whatever is going on with her.”
“And if I can’t?” The words that she hadn’t dared say aloud in the hallway with Theo came tumbling out before she could stop them. She dropped into one of the metal chairs that flanked her desk.
The physical therapist came over and sat in the other one. “It’s a bit of pressure, yes?”
“Yes. And I want to figure it out. But I’m at a dead end at the moment.” She didn’t know why she was suddenly voicing her fears, but there was something in the other woman’s eyes that said she’d known fear—intimately—and had come out on the other side.
“Sometimes we just have to give ourselves a bit of space to regroup. And that’s when it normally comes to us. That realization that’s been in front of us all along.”
Were they still talking about Ivy? Or about something else?
“I hope you’re right.”
“I am. You’ll see.” Naomi leaned forward and captured her hands. “Just give yourself permission to take a step or two back and look at the problem with a wide-angle lens.”
Something about those words caught at an area of her brain, which set to work in the background. “Thank you. I think I needed to hear that.” She squeezed the other woman’s fingers before letting go. Gently. Not the way Theo had done in the hallway. “How are things with you and Finn, if I may ask?”
Naomi’s smile caused her nose to crinkle in a way that was both adorable and mischievous. “You can. And it’s great. Better than I have a right to expect.”
“It’s exactly what you should expect. And what you deserve.” From what Madison had heard, Naomi had had a hard time of it, losing loved ones in a terrible conflict in her home country. But she’d overcome it and had learned to live her life in the present.
Maybe Naomi should write a how-to book on how to do that. Madison would be one of her first customers if that ever happened.
“Thank you. Finn’s a good man.” Naomi sucked down a deep breath and squared her shoulders. “Now, about Ivy...”
Madison went over what she would like to see happen with Ivy’s therapy tomorrow. Although she couldn’t walk or even hold herself up on the parallel bars they used to help people learn to walk again, they could still try