if he was really telling the truth, but then remembered how he’d referred to Marybeth by name. He hadn’t said maybe JT should let him talk to Mom, he’d said maybe JT should let him talk to Marybeth. The difference eased the tension in her chest.
“Sounds like you have your hands full,” she murmured. She wondered where JT’s mother was. Had Gabe gotten a divorce too? Did they share custody?
“Yeah, a bit.” He shrugged, although his expression was still troubled. “I’d ask you out for dinner, but I can’t leave JT home alone and his babysitter takes night classes.”
Dinner? As much as she was tempted, she knew seeing Gabe outside work was just asking for trouble. The last thing she needed was to be seen with one of her colleagues outside work. Still, it sounded as if he might need some help. And she was more curious than she had a right to be about JT’s mother. “It’s okay, but if you need help with JT, let me know.”
He flashed a lopsided smile. “Thanks. But I think I have everything under control.”
Of course he did. Gabe was always strong, and extremely competent. The way he’d taken control with Mark proved that. “See you later, then.”
“Take care, Holly.”
She turned away, heading back to her office where she’d left the list of patients she was scheduled to see.
The list was long, but that was all right. Better to keep busy than to wallow in the mistakes of the past.
Or to wish for something she could never have.
After he found someone to cover over his lunch-break, Gabe rushed home, knowing he didn’t have a lot of time. “Hey, JT, how are you?”
“Uncle Gabe!” The five-year-old threw himself into Gabe’s arms. “I missed you,” he mumbled against his shoulder.
Gabe closed his eyes, holding the little boy close. The poor kid had been through so much, yet he couldn’t keep leaving work every day either. “I missed you too, sport.” He hugged JT tight, then eased back to look into the boy’s eyes. “You had the bad dream again?”
JT nodded. “Wild animals came out of the woods and tried to bite me.”
Gabe didn’t understand this sudden fear of wild animals that JT seemed to have. But he suspected the real underlying factor was losing his mother. And worrying if he was going to lose Gabe too. “Last night, before you went to bed, I explained how I had to work today. Remember?”
JT’s lower lip trembled, his blue eyes wide. “I know, but when I had the nightmare, I forgot.”
“It’s okay.” He couldn’t be mad at the poor kid, after everything he’d been through. When his sister, Claire, had been killed in a car crash, he’d taken custody of JT. His mother, who’d recently moved to Florida and remarried, had offered to move back to help out in raising her grandson, but he’d declined her generous offer. After all these years, his mother deserved to be happy.
So he’d taken JT because there wasn’t anyone else. And he’d even gone as far as to apply for formal adoption. He’d managed to get things moving the week after Claire’s death but now they were waiting on DNA tests from the two men who, according to his sister’s diary, may be JT’s biological father. Despite the security he’d tried to give his nephew, JT had a deep fear of losing Gabe in the same abrupt way JT had lost his mom.
He’d hoped the boy’s nightmares would fade over time, but so far no luck. Of course, it had only been four weeks since the funeral.
“Everything all right?” he asked Marybeth, JT’s babysitter. The girl was a young college student who watched JT during the day and took a graduate class two evenings a week, on Mondays and Wednesdays. He was lucky to have her, especially when she’d established a great rapport with his nephew.
“Fine,” she reassured him. “JT is always better once he talks to you.”
Crisis averted, at least for the moment. “Do you think he’s okay to attend his pre-school this afternoon?”
“Sure. I think he’ll have fun.”
“Okay, then. I’ll pick him up on my way home.”
“Let me know if you run into trouble, I don’t start class until six o’clock.”
“I will.” The few times he’d had to work late Marybeth had been more than willing to pick JT up after pre-school. He turned back toward JT. “I’m going back to work now, but I’ll pick you up at four. You know how to tell the time, don’t you?”
JT nodded with enthusiasm. “Yep. When the big hand is on the twelve and the little hand is on the four.” He hopped from one foot to the other, his earlier fears seemingly forgotten. “Me and Jeremy are going to play swords this afternoon.”
“Be careful.” Why did boys always want to play with weapons? Gabe figured he must have done the same thing at JT’s age, but it was amazing how almost anything he gave the boy to play with ended up as a sword, a knife or a gun, no matter how hard he tried to discourage it. Maybe JT could use the sword to kill the wild animals in his dreams. He pressed a kiss on the top of JT’s head. “All right, then. I’ll see you later, buddy.”
“Bye, Uncle Gabe.” JT’s face was relaxed and smiling, making him feel better about going back to work. As he strode to his car, he noticed he’d barely have time to wolf down a quick sandwich before seeing patients. But the potential indigestion from eating too fast was worth taking the time to calm JT’s fears.
Too bad he hadn’t been able to ask Holly out for dinner, but leaving JT wasn’t an option. The boy’s emotional status was still too fragile. Would probably be too fragile for a long time to come.
Yet after meeting Holly again that morning, he couldn’t get her out of his mind. Interesting how she’d assumed he’d left because of the moment he’d sensed she’d been about to kiss him when in reality it had been his own response he’d run from. She couldn’t know how close he’d come to crossing the line that night, too. Stepping back from her had been one of the hardest things he’d ever had to do.
Tom had been right during their argument on his wedding day. He had wanted Holly for himself. But that was then, and things had changed. He wasn’t just a single guy anymore, he had JT to think about now. The boy needed a home, stability. Besides, he wasn’t still hung up on Holly.
He’d moved on with his life, had been engaged to marry Jennifer before Claire had died. Their engagement had been broken off when he’d discovered that she hadn’t been at all willing to take JT in as their adopted son. She’d kept arguing that they needed to find JT’s real father, something he was trying to do. His plan all along, even once they found JT’s biological father, was to fight for sole custody of JT.
Forced to make a choice between Jennifer and JT, his young nephew had won hands down. And if the reality of living with a young boy day in and day out was overwhelming, he’d have to learn to deal with it.
He caught a glimpse of Holly leaving the ED and his pulse kicked up in awareness. He took a deep breath, trying to ignore his body’s reaction, telling himself it was only physical because he hadn’t been with a woman since Jennifer had walked out on him.
There were more important things to worry about than the last time he’d gone out with a woman. Right now, JT had to come first.
With everything that had happened in the past, he knew better than anyone that he and Holly could never be more than friends.
Holly spent the rest of the afternoon trying to keep her mind off Gabe and figuring out how to balance the stat calls with the scheduled patients she needed to see. At three-thirty, her mother called to let her know she was finished with dialysis. Holly had just finished seeing her last patient, so she readily agreed to drive her mother home.
The outpatient dialysis unit wasn’t far from Children’s Medical Center, so it didn’t