Red Shoes and A Diary. Mia Zachary

your way.”

      Didn’t he always? Alex held onto his patience with effort. “Braga contacted me, though we haven’t hooked up. Em has solid information that Ramos is on his way here, if he’s not here already.”

      “It’s a decent start but you have to move on this. You’ve got the rest of the week to get squared away. After that, the Ramos case is turned over to someone else.”

      “The hell it is!” Alex sat up so quickly the pillow fell to the floor. He struggled to hold onto his temper, which had been dangerously short of late. “We’ve been building the case against Ramos for two years, Brent. You’re not taking us off it. Not when we’re so close—”

      “You’d better play this one by the book, Alex. Do you hear me? Any action you take will be called into question until Internal Affairs clears you on the shooting.”

      He scowled. Like he needed the reminder. Both he and Emelio had been on admin probation until this latest break in the case. “IAD can kiss my ass. I did what I had to to get the job done.”

      “You know, you’ve got a real attitude problem lately.”

      “Yeah, well, you can tell me all about it when you quit riding a desk. I haven’t lost my edge,” he said it as much to convince himself as his boss.

      “Hell, if anything, your edges are too jagged,” Brent muttered. “Bring me up to speed.”

      “‘Nick Alexander’ is definitely going to be brought into play. Since Manny Ortega got busted, Ramos needs another underground banker for the Miami operation. I’ll use Braga to get to him and get the info we need.”

      “The Attorney General is demanding enough evidence to present to a federal grand jury. She wants it yesterday. Don’t screw up on this one.”

      The line went dead before Alex could say another word. He hung up the phone, then looked around for his cigarettes. He felt the past stalking him like a dark shadow. Maybe he had lost his edge, those sharp instincts that too often meant the difference between making or breaking a case. Overtown had been a major screw-up. His.

      He should have seen it coming. Somehow, he should have seen it. Emelio got too close to their informant but Alex backed him up in front of the brass, despite his misgivings. As a result, two people died and the bad guys got in the wind.

      The underlying guilt made him think about Greg. Not long after he joined the DEA, his younger brother overdosed. All Greg’s life, Alex did his best to protect him. It was a hard truth to face that his best hadn’t been good enough.

      Had it ever been enough? How long was it since he felt like he made any kind of difference? For eight years, he’d waded through the cesspool of the drug underworld. He’d kept friends and family at a distance in order to immerse himself in The Life. And still his sacrifices came down to bureaucratic bullshit and overturned convictions.

      He was really starting to hate this damned job.

      Wandering over to the French doors, he stepped out onto the balcony. He tapped the cigarette pack until one slid out, then pinched off the end. The stress he’d been under lately made it hard to quit. Smoking half a cigarette didn’t seem as bad.

      He felt as if he was moving through life instead of living it. There was an emptiness inside him and he wasn’t sure who the hell he was anymore. Two months ago he was Andy Ruiz. Today he was Nick Alexander. And next week? Next month?

      Emelio came out to stand beside him, resting his elbows on the railing. “I take it the brass is stepping up the pressure?”

      He sucked in nicotine and stared into the distance. “I learned something when I was under deep cover in the Southwest a few years back, hombre.”

      Emelio turned his head to look at him.

      “I roughed up informants, watched criminals kill each other without losing any sleep. I even went so far as sampling the product to secure my identity. If you can name it, I probably did it.”

      “I know, man. Your rep preceded you. What’s your point?”

      “Supervisors usually look the other way when you cross the line, just as long as you get results and make them look good. Not this time. This time it’s all on the line.”

      “Closing the Ramos case will go a long way to restoring our badges.” Emelio gave him a smile that didn’t reach his eyes. “But maybe we should look into that investigation firm we’ve talked about.”

      Alex shook his head and blew a stream of smoke into the night air. “We’ve got a mission and nothing’s going to keep me from seeing it through. This job means everything to me, Em. It’s all I’ve got.”