Zac left, Kent tidied up the place, gathered his thermos and shut off the lights while thinking about Zac’s words. Kent felt he couldn’t accept God’s love because he wasn’t worthy of it. Lisa would still be alive if not for him. So what if they’d lost the ranch? He’d persisted because he wanted to make his dad’s dream for the place come alive when he should have let it go and started again.
Shoulda, woulda, coulda.
The awful truth was that he’d chosen his father’s dream over his wife.
Kent wouldn’t make that mistake again. Somehow he’d get this building ready for Jaclyn, no matter what it cost him. It couldn’t bring Lisa back or erase his guilt over her death, but maybe it would ease Jaclyn’s grief.
He had to remember only one thing.
No matter how beautiful or how interesting Jaclyn was, no matter how many times he felt that zing of attraction when she smiled at him, there could be nothing between them.
Kent’s love had failed the one woman he’d pledged to cherish. That would not happen again because as far as he was concerned, he had nothing to offer a woman but failure.
Jaclyn was a friend, but that’s all she could ever be.
Chapter Three
“I’m begging, Pete. I know you’re full-time at the mine, but I just need a couple of hours of your time. That’s all.”
Jaclyn paused in the doorway, struck by Kent’s tone. Were plumbers so hard to get? She hadn’t considered that. She’d figured Kent would pick up the phone, hire someone to do the renovation and she’d move in. But he sounded almost desperate.
“I didn’t realize you had an exclusivity clause. Maybe if you asked them to waive it, they’d let you help with the clinic. It’s for a good purpose, for our town’s benefit. That’s what their people promised when they begged us to let the mine in.” He paused for effect. “This would be a good opportunity to keep that promise.” There was silence as he listened. “I really appreciate it, Pete. Thanks.”
Not wanting to be caught eavesdropping, Jaclyn waited a few moments before she let the front door bang behind her. “Hello?”
“Hi.” Kent blinked at her. He was covered in a chalky dust that turned his dark hair gray. He’d been putting on goggles but now pulled them away, his blue eyes meeting hers. “Are you slumming?”
“Pretty fancy slum you’ve got here,” she teased.
“Not yet, but it will be if I can get it done.” He frowned. “Did you need something?”
“No. But I thought you might. I came to see if there was something I could help you with this evening.” Jaclyn made a face. “Emergency was busy today—an issue with the mine. I need to work off the stress. I figured if you were into demolition, I’d channel my energy into that. Have you eaten dinner?” She glanced around amazed by the mess he’d created.
“I haven’t had time for dinner.” Kent gave her pristine clothes a dark look. “You can’t work here dressed like that. Leave this to me, Jaclyn.”
“Nonsense. I make a perfectly good gofer assistant and I can clean with the best of them. Besides, I’ve got the clothes issue covered. But first we eat. Deal?” She waited for his nod before setting down the two bags she’d carried in. She removed containers of Chinese food from one. “Come on. Let’s sample this while it’s hot.”
At first it seemed as if Kent would refuse. Maybe he was used to working alone, or maybe he thought she’d get in his way. Either way Jaclyn wasn’t going to let it dissuade her from pitching in.
“Thank you,” he said when she handed him a loaded plate of stir fried vegetables.
“Welcome.” She separated her chopsticks then speared a piece of pineapple. “Yum.”
“It is good. Thanks,” he said again, looking directly at her, his blue eyes bright.
“I don’t know if Chinese is rancher’s food but nobody in town has takeout steaks.” She giggled at his droll look. “I’m guessing by that kitchen of yours that Lisa was a gourmet cook.”
Kent’s hand froze halfway to his mouth, his face pale at the mention of his wife.
“I’m so sorry,” she said, feeling a fool. “I didn’t mean to bring back painful memories.”
“No, it’s okay.” He inhaled slowly then let out his pent-up breath before he spoke. “Lisa liked to cook if it was for entertaining—invite people over and she would go all out.”
“I remember some parties Lisa invited me to in high school. She was a fantastic hostess back then, and an amazing cook.” She watched the sadness of his face ease. “I suppose entertaining does provide an incentive to create. Not that I’d know. I can do basic cooking, which means I can open soup cans.” Jaclyn took a bite, waiting to see if Kent would continue talking about Lisa or if he would change the subject.
“What happened at the mine?” he asked. “Anything serious?”
Note to self, she thought: stop bringing up Lisa.
“A chemical explosion left burns on a number of miners. Emergency was swamped. This isn’t the day for the traveling doctors so the hospital asked me to help. There were no critical injuries, so that’s a blessing.” She shuddered. “I loathe treating burns.”
“Why?” Kent studied her with a puzzled look.
“Because of the pain. Kids or adults, it doesn’t matter. Burns are the worst for continued pain. After initial treatment there’s always the task of debrading the scar tissue to allow new tissue to grow—very time-consuming and more pain for the patient.” She blinked. “As a firefighter, you probably know that.”
“Since I’ve been on the job we’ve never had anyone badly burned, thank heaven.” Kent said.
“That’s lucky. Now—” Jaclyn lifted out a surprise “—I scored this from the bakery. Are you interested?”
“Who wouldn’t be interested in key lime pie?” Kent raised an eyebrow when she cut a slice.
“What?” She studied the piece then chuckled. “Too small? Well, okay then.” Jaclyn whacked out a much larger hunk of pie with her plastic knife. “Better?”
“Much better. Thank you.” He dug in with relish.
“I’ll have to jog for hours after this.” She tasted her pie and sighed.
“You can join Zac. He’s always jogging.” Kent told her about their other school friend, Nick, and she shared the latest on her best friends Shay and Brianna.
“I remember Shay was offered some kind of contract just after her dad lost his job,” Kent said.
“Modeling, yes. She felt she couldn’t decline it because they needed the money so badly. Her father was broke. But he’s gone now and she’s finishing her physiotherapy degree. And Brianna is a practicing psychologist now in Chicago.”
Kent finished his pie and added the plate and plastic fork to his garbage load.
“Both Shay and Brianna have gone through tough times.” Jaclyn gnawed on her lower lip. “It’s difficult to understand why things happen. Sometimes it seems to me that God expects too much of us humans.”
“I’ll second that.” The words spilled out of Kent in a rush of bitterness.
“I’m sure you miss Lisa,” she said before she could stop herself. So much for not bringing her up.
He nodded, accepted the cup of coffee she offered and they drank in silence for a while.
“I’m on call tonight so I might have to take off at any moment. We’d better get to work.” She cleaned up the remains