don’t cry. But they do bellow. Did he bellow? Please tell me at the very least he bellowed. If he didn’t, I’ll have to worry about him.”
“You’re ridiculous,” Felicity said.
Truly, she was. Ridiculously good at getting Felicity to spill her guts. Because suddenly, she was brimming over with the need to tell Maia everything.
“He said he didn’t want me to go.” Felicity bit her bottom lip. Maia looked at her expectantly. “Actually, he said, ‘How am I supposed to get by without you?’”
“Oooh, giiirl.” Maia whistled.
And that was how Maia did it. It was that subtle, almost like sleight of hand. One minute, Felicity would be steadfast in her resolution to bury a secret deep in her heart, in a place only she knew. Then somehow Maia had diverted her attention and extracted the secret from her.
“Get by without you,” Felicity repeated. “Not live without you. There’s a world of difference in getting by and living.”
Maia shook her head. “Same thing, baby girl. That’s simply Beast-speak. He loves you. You need to tell him how you feel.”
This time Felicity was the one shaking her head.
“Then you’re telling me you’re perfectly happy getting by rather than living?” The woman was relentless. “But he let you off work early.” Maia glanced at her watch. “Relatively speaking. It’s 6:45. I guess that’s almost normal business hours.”
“He’s having dinner with his parents tonight,” Felicity said. “After that, he’s catching a flight to Atlanta for a meeting tomorrow. I was at a good stopping point. I figured it wouldn’t hurt to call it a day at a reasonable hour for a change.”
“I’m surprised he didn’t insist that you go to Atlanta with him. Seems like he has a hard time functioning without you there to keep everything in order.”
Felicity would’ve loved to go to Atlanta with him. Arriving at the hotel, which would allow her to indulge in the brief illusion that they were checking in together. One room. A king-size bed. Both of them naked, spending one glorious night making love—
Felicity tried to shake the image of hot, sweaty, naked Austin. It wasn’t the first time she’d thought about what he’d look like naked. She just knew that underneath his custom-fit Tom Ford suits, Austin’s body would be long and lean and sexy. His shoulders—oh, those shoulders, they were so perfect they made her want to weep—those broad shoulders would give way to strong, muscled arms—not too muscled, but just right so that his biceps would bulge when he pulled her into his arms and against his perfectly defined chest. Lean hips would showcase a washboard-flat stomach just above the part of his body that would rock her world.
She drew in a sharp breath. She couldn’t help it. That’s what he did to her. It wasn’t considered objectifying a man if you were in love with him, right? She didn’t think of anyone else like this. She didn’t want to just sleep with him—okay, she did want to sleep with him and she’d fully imagined that experience, too. She wanted so much more than lust or a one-night stand. She wanted to love Austin and she wanted him to love her, too. But he didn’t. Clearly, he didn’t.
Her sexy daydreams were the consolation prize for the fact that beyond the office, Austin didn’t even realize she existed.
“That’s not true,” Felicity said, answering her friend’s comment about how Austin couldn’t function without her.
Maia pinned her with a dubious look.
“Okay, maybe it’s partially true,” Felicity conceded. “It’s called job security. I make myself indispensable and I keep getting paid.”
“I think you’re long past needing to worry about job security. How long has it been now?”
“Almost five years.”
“Do you think he will remember your anniversary?” There was a gleam in Maia’s eye that Felicity tried to ignore. “I think it’s an occasion that calls for flowers and jewelry.”
“Stop. He’s my boss. There will be no jewelry involved. Because I’ll be at my new job by then.”
“But you wouldn’t mind jewelry. Maybe a ring?”
“Maia, stop. Even if I was still working there, I doubt it would even cross his mind to get me a card. I’m sure in his mind my paycheck is proof of his appreciation.”
Austin did pay her well. She couldn’t dispute that. Once, when she’d been offered an entry-level position as an account executive with a local advertising agency, she’d given him two weeks’ notice. He’d doubled her salary without blinking an eye.
He’d told her she was worth it.
For a bright and shiny moment, she’d read something deeper into his words. Something that bordered on personal. Then she’d blinked and the next thing she knew, he’d launched into what a hassle it would be to find and train someone new and what an imposition it would be to suffer through a new assistant’s initial learning curve.
The explanation had dulled the luster in a hurry.
Still, the money was nice. The raise had allowed her to save up a substantial down payment for a house. A year later she’d been in position to buy one of the units in the cute little green house in New Orleans’s Irish Channel neighborhood. Technically, it was half a house, but it was hers and she loved it so much she wouldn’t have traded it for one of the stately mansions in the neighboring Garden District. Well, in theory, anyway.
In the years she’d worked for Austin, nothing had changed. Felicity was still single, and Austin was none the wiser to her feelings for him. Every day was the same. Except, the days had morphed into weeks and weeks into months. Now, here she was looking back at nearly half a decade that had gone by in a heartbeat and she felt like a hamster on a wheel, bored and mostly unfulfilled by the sameness of it all, but safe and comfortable hiding behind her fat bank account and feelings for him she could never reveal.
Emotionally, she couldn’t afford to go on like this much longer. She’d go insane. That’s why she had promised herself she would quit and get a real job after she graduated with her MBA at the end of the month.
“I don’t understand why you don’t just level with him and tell him how you feel,” Maia said. “You might just be surprised. I mean, you’re leaving soon anyway. Nothing ventured, nothing gained.”
Just the thought made Felicity want to turn and run. She had no idea where she wanted to run to other than somewhere far away from the idea of confessing her secret to Austin. In fact, right now she was sorry she’d confided in Maia. It wasn’t the first time her friend had suggested such nonsense. She’d been bringing it up more frequently since Felicity had told her of her plans to leave after she graduated.
“Austin said tonight at dinner he would talk to his father about creating an advertising position for me. That’s all the more reason why I need to keep my feelings to myself.”
“I don’t know,” Maia mused. “Most likely, you won’t be reporting to him anymore if they do make a position for you. Might be a good time to come clean with your feelings.”
“Stop.” Felicity held up her hand like a traffic cop. “Please listen to me. If they create a job for me—and that’s a big if—I would be one of the few non-Fortunes in a position that wasn’t support staff. If I start publicly mooning over Austin, it could be career suicide or at the very least I would embarrass myself.”
Maia shrugged. “You look pretty cozy over there in your comfort zone.”
“Leaving the comfort of a well-paying job is hardly staying in my comfort zone.”
“You know what I’m talking about,” Maia said. “I’m talking about the love part. I’m talking about you not wanting to