“Soon.”
“Did I just say no? I’m sure I heard myself say no.”
Jesse, a pretty blonde whom Rina had known since they were both zygotes, raised her eyebrows.
Rina glanced around to make sure they were alone. Even so, she lowered her voice. “I can’t.”
“You have to. It’s been a year, Rina. This is insane. It’s the holidays.”
“I’m not sure what the time of year has to do with anything.”
Jesse sighed. “It’s when you want to be with the people you love. You love Cameron. Tell him.”
Rina winced. “Don’t say that,” she whispered as forcefully as she could. “Not here. Someone might hear you.”
“It’s Friday afternoon. Everyone is gone but us. Cameron’s out at the Castle Ranch, checking on one of the goats there.” Her friend moved closer and, Carina noticed thankfully, lowered her voice. “You’re my best friend and I totally support whatever you decide, but I also know it’s time to tell you that you’re acting like an idiot.”
“You’ve told me that every day for six months. It’s hardly a news flash.”
“Then do something. If not now, when? Are you going to waste another year being in love with a man who has no idea how you feel?”
Rina opened her mouth, then closed it. She wanted nothing more than to confess her feelings to the man she loved.
She could still remember the first time she’d seen Cameron McKenzie, DVM. He’d bought the practice from the retiring veterinarian with a promise that all the staff would stay. That included her, the practice’s resident groomer. He’d requested everyone meet with him on a Saturday afternoon. She’d walked into the building, not sure what to expect. He’d turned, smiled, and she’d been lost.
Seriously, there’d practically been a swell of music and cartoon animals putting ribbons and flowers in her hair.
She wasn’t sure what it was about Cameron that got to her. The wavy dark hair and deep green eyes were only the beginnings of his good looks. Still, her feelings weren’t all about how handsome he was. It was the way he cared about his work and how he treated his staff. But if she had to guess, she would say her fate had truly been sealed the moment she’d met Kaitlyn.
She adored the little girl and they had become instant friends. Kaitlyn was smart and funny and just as caring as her dad. The only part of their family that didn’t make sense was the absence of a mother. Cameron didn’t say much about his ex, so all of Rina’s information had come from his daughter. Kaitlyn was fairly matter-of-fact about her past, stating her mommy had left shortly after Kaitlyn had been born. Rina could still remember her steady gaze as she’d said, “Babies are a lot of work and my mommy wasn’t ready.”
Cameron had shared few details, but those he mentioned were in line with what Kaitlyn had said; his wife had walked away from her newborn and husband and had never returned.
Since then, from what she could tell, he’d devoted himself to being a single father and working hard at his practice. He never dated, hadn’t once been caught flirting and showed no interest in one woman over another. In a town with a man shortage, he was practically an irresistible force.
Rina had told herself she would get over her crush, that it was just that Cameron was new and shiny. But as time had passed, her feelings had only grown. Now everything was more complicated because of the fact that she took care of Kaitlyn.
Every school day, Rina arrived at the McKenzie household early, made sure Kaitlyn was up and dressed, then fixed her breakfast and walked her to the bus. After school the girl rode the bus to the veterinary practice where she hung out with Rina until it was time to go home.
Back at the McKenzie house, Rina helped her with her homework and started dinner. In the past few months, she’d begun staying to eat with them. Unfortunately, she couldn’t remember exactly how that had started. She wanted to say that Cameron had asked, but she suspected the invitation had come from his daughter.
Cameron paid her as a groomer and as the person taking care of his daughter. And, even though he was friendly and considerate, she couldn’t be completely sure he’d ever thought of her as more than a friend. Which meant admitting her feelings put a lot on the line. What if he wasn’t interested? What if telling the truth meant losing her friendship with Kaitlyn and her job?
“I’d rather have what I have now than not have anything at all,” Rina admitted to her friend.
Jesse shook her head. “You’re living half a life, Rina, and that’s not you. Your parents were crazy about each other until the day they died. Your grandparents are still in love. Don’t you want what they have?”
“I’m scared.”
“Love is supposed to be scary. If it was easy, everyone would do it.”
Rina knew she was right. The thought of having it all, of being able to admit her feelings to Cameron and having him feel the same way, made her ache with longing. She’d known he was the one from the first second they’d met and her feelings had never wavered. But...
“What if he doesn’t love me back?”
“Then you hurt and heal and find someone else.”
“I don’t want anyone else.”
“So you’d rather have half of nothing than take the chance? That’s not like you.”
“I wouldn’t just be losing him. I’d lose Kaitlyn, too.”
“You wouldn’t have to. You could still be friends with her.”
Rina was less sure that was possible. Losing one would be hard enough, but losing them both would be more than she could handle.
CHAPTER TWO
“TINSEL AND GOATS don’t mix,” Cameron said, looping his stethoscope around his neck. “Not that she’ll listen.”
Heidi Simpson nodded as she knelt next to her goat. “I swear, Athena has supernatural powers. She’s forever getting out of her pen and doing things she shouldn’t. I’ve been so careful with the holiday decorations.”
Cameron believed her. Unfortunately a single box of tinsel had fallen out of her shopping bag and Athena had found it. Like most goats, she was willing to eat nearly everything. The tinsel had tangled in her digestive system, but had finally worked its way through.
“She’ll be fine now,” he said. “Give her a couple of days for her stomach to calm down.” He patted the goat resting in the small goat barn, then rose to his feet.
“You’ve been great,” Heidi told him as she stood as well. “You’ve been here every day. I really appreciate it.”
“Part of the job.”
“Still. I know Athena is grateful, too, even if she’s having trouble articulating her feelings.”
Heidi smiled as she spoke.
Cameron collected his medical bag then followed Heidi to his truck. It was late afternoon on the first Friday in December. The skies were dark and threatening, but the temperature wasn’t cold enough for snow in town. Further up the mountain, they could get a good dump in the next couple of days.
Holiday decorations brightened the old house that stood on the ranch. The exterior was a little shabby, but the twinkling lights added a welcoming glow. Heidi was friendly enough. Pretty, he thought absently. Single. He should have been interested, maybe ask her to coffee or out for a drink. Only he wasn’t the least bit interested.
He’d dated plenty when he’d been younger and had learned he was the kind of man who wanted to settle down. The problem was with whom.
After his daughter had