Flight of a Starling. Lisa Heathfield

laughs.

      ‘You’re not,’ I tell him. He’s a fool, tapping into the wrong side of danger.

      It’s a van, on the opposite side of the road to us, but with no space to go past Will.

      ‘Get up,’ Dean says loudly.

      The van must see the figure lying down, but it doesn’t slow. Instead its horn is pressed and blares towards us. It seems to speed up as it comes and Will lies flat. None of us move. We watch the van swerve, missing Will by just inches. It crashes its wheels up across the pavement, fumes filling the air. The driver screams at us from behind the glass, before the van thuds back on to the road, all noise and lights and anger until it disappears and leaves us all staring at this boy in the road.

      He jumps up in one movement and hollers like some sort of wolf.

      ‘Burn baby burn,’ he shouts, walking back towards us.

      ‘You’re an idiot,’ Dean says, turning away from him and looking straight at Lo. ‘Sorry about him.’

      ‘We’re going,’ I say, pulling on Lo’s arm. But even now she’s hesitating and I know she wants to split herself in two so she can come with me away from Will, but also stay talking to her fountain boy in the rain.

      ‘Can I see you again?’ Dean asks and Will smirks and thumps him light on his arm.

      Lo looks up at Dean, shielding her eyes from the streaks falling from the wet sky.

      ‘You will,’ she says. And I know I have to get her away from here, before her heart gets too entangled with his.

      ‘We’re going,’ I say and I pull her with me, giving her no choice. I make her run from him, heading towards our circle of vans sitting tight against the rain.

      The light in Mada is on, so we go up the steps, push open the door and stamp our wet feet on the mat.

      ‘You’re not coming in like that,’ Ma says, getting up.

      Ernest and Spider are sitting with Da at the table, each holding a fan of cards.

      ‘We’re fine, Ma,’ Lo says, but we wait as she gets a towel and makes us rub through our hair and wipe dry our hands.

      ‘Where did you go?’ Spider asks, as Lo and I take off our shoes and put them neatly in the small shoe rack. ‘Ash and I were looking for you.’

      ‘We just went for a walk,’ I say, saving Lo from a lie she won’t want to tell.

      ‘Where’s Grands?’ Lo asks, squeezing in beside Spider.

      ‘In bed already trying to sleep, so no party noise from you,’ Da tells her. He puts his arm round Ma as she sits back next to him.

      ‘I’m tired in any case,’ Lo says.

      ‘Not tired enough to disrupt a card game I see,’ Ma smiles at her.

      ‘Did you meet anyone?’ Ernest asks.

      ‘No one interesting,’ I say. I glance quickly at Lo so she doesn’t say more. ‘Why’s Rob not playing?’

      ‘He chose an early night,’ Da says, his fingers flicking quick through his cards. ‘It’s your turn.’ He nods at Ernest.

      ‘I’d get rid of that ace of clubs when it’s your go, Spider,’ Lo says laughing. Spider opens his mouth like a goldfish and holds his cards away from her.

      ‘Don’t spoil it, Lo,’ Ma tells her.

      ‘I’m here to help,’ she says.

      ‘You’re here to be a pest,’ Da says, but his frown is lined with a smile.

      ‘Do you want one of these?’ Ma asks, passing the plate of bread twists to me. The stringy dough we plaited together this afternoon is solid and cracked brown where we painted it with egg yolk.

      ‘Needs cheese, I’m thinking,’ Spider says, grabbing another when he’s barely finished chewing his own.

      ‘You can keep your thinkings,’ Lo says, even though she didn’t help us make them.

      ‘I’m out,’ Da says, laying his fan of cards flat on the table. ‘Three sixes and a run of hearts.’ He’s so proud, just for winning, his Da smile wide.

      ‘That’s not fair,’ Ernest says. ‘I was so close.’

      ‘It’s all fair,’ Da chuckles. Fair is a word that was invented for him. The cards look small in his hands as he sweeps them all up, packs them neat and shuffles them. ‘Who’s in?’

      ‘I’m going to bed,’ Lo says, yawning and putting her arms up high as though she needs to prove it to us.

      ‘I could do with an early night too,’ I say.

      ‘Bed already?’ Ma asks.

      ‘I reckon so,’ Lo says and we get up together, like twins from the womb. I lean over to kiss Da. My ma sweeps her fingers over her forehead before touching my own, passing her good dreams to me.

      ‘Sweet dreams,’ she says as she does the same to Lo.

      My shoes feel cold as I put them on, Lo holding my arm to stop herself from toppling.

      ‘Night all,’ she says, before we close the door on them.

      I’d forgotten about the rain. It’s not too strong, but it’s reminding us it’s there. Lo runs to Terini, jumps up the steps and unlocks our door. She holds it open to me, with one arm behind her.

      ‘I won’t be long,’ I say. I know she’s confused. ‘I just need to see someone.’ I’m walking away, so that she can’t ask too many questions and I won’t have to lie.

      ‘Ash?’ she asks.

      I wave my hand at her. ‘Don’t worry,’ I say. ‘I’ll be back soon.’ And I run quickly round the edge of the big top so that she can no longer see me.