Charles Reade Reade

The Cloister and the Hearth: A Tale of the Middle Ages


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in a sweet room, but went for nothing here. Gerard asked her if he could have something to eat.

      She opened her eyes with astonishment. "Supper is over this hour and more."

      "But I had none of it, good dame."

      "Is that my fault? You are welcome to your share for me."

      "But I was benighted, and a stranger, and belated sore against my will."

      "What have I to do with that? All the world knows 'the Star of the Forest' sups from six till eight. Come before six, ye sup well; come before eight, ye sup as pleases Heaven; come after eight, ye get a clean bed, and a stirrup cup, or a horn of kine's milk at the dawning."

      Gerard looked blank. "May I go to bed then, dame?" said he sulkily, "for it is ill sitting up wet and fasting, and the byword saith 'he sups who sleeps.'"

      "The beds are not come yet," replied the landlady: "you will sleep when the rest do. Inns are not built for one."

      It was Gerard's turn to be astonished. "The beds were not come: what in Heaven's name did she mean?" But he was afraid to ask, for every word he had spoken hitherto had amazed the assembly; and zoological eyes were upon him—he felt them. He leaned against the wall and sighed audibly.

      At this fresh zoological trait a titter went round the watchful company.

      "So this is Germany," thought Gerard, "and Germany is a great country by Holland. Small nations for me."

      He consoled himself by reflecting it was to be his last, as well as his first, night in the land. His reverie was interrupted by an elbow driven into his ribs. He turned sharp on his assailant; who pointed across the room. Gerard looked, and a woman in the corner was beckoning him. He went towards her gingerly, being surprised and irresolute, so that to a spectator her beckoning finger seemed to be pulling him across the floor with a gut line. When he had got up to her, "hold the child," said she in a fine hearty voice and in a moment she plumped the bairn into Gerard's arms.

      He stood transfixed, jelly of lead in his hands, and sudden horror in his elongated countenance.

      At this ruefully expressive face the lynx-eyed conclave laughed loud and long.

      "Never heed them," said the woman cheerfully: "they know no better; how should they, bred an' born in a wood?" She was rummaging among her clothes with the two penetrating hands, one of which Gerard had set free. Presently she fished out a small tin plate and a dried pudding, and resuming her child with one arm, held them forth to Gerard with the other, keeping a thumb on the pudding to prevent it from slipping off.

      "Put it in the stove," said she, "you are too young to lie down fasting."

      Gerard thanked her warmly: but on his way to the stove his eye fell on the landlady. "May I dame?" said he beseechingly.

      "Why not?" said she.

      The question was evidently another surprise, though less startling than its predecessors.

      Coming to the stove, Gerard found the oven door obstructed by "the rammish clowns." They did not budge. He hesitated a moment: the landlady saw, calmly put down her work, and coming up pulled a hircine man or two hither, and pushed a hircine man or two thither, with the impassive countenance of a housewife moving her furniture. "Turn about is fair play," she said. "Ye have been dry this ten minutes and better."

      Her experienced eye was not deceived; Gorgonii had done stewing, and begun baking. Debarred the stove they trundled home all but one, who stood like a table where the landlady had moved him to like a table, and Gerard baked his pudding, and, getting to the stove, burst into steam.

      The door opened, and in flew a bundle of straw.

      It was hurled by a hind with a pitchfork; another and another came flying after it till the room was like a clean farm yard. These were then dispersed round the stove in layers like the seats in an arena, and in a moment the company was all on its back.

      The beds had come.

      Gerard took out his pudding and found it delicious. While he was relishing it, the woman who had given it him, and who was now abed, beckoned him again. He went to her bundle side. "She is waiting for you," whispered the woman. Gerard returned to the stove, and gobbled the rest of his sausage, casting uneasy glances at the landlady seated silent as fate amid the prostrate multitude. The food bolted, he went to her and said, "Thank you kindly, dame, for waiting for me."

      "You are welcome," said she calmly, making neither much nor little of the favour; and with that began to gather up the feathers; but Gerard stopped her. "Nay, that is my task;" and he went down on his knees and collected them with ardour. She watched him demurely.

      "I wot not whence ye come," said she with a relic of distrust; adding more cordially, "but ye have been well brought up; y' have had a good mother, I'll go bail."

      At the door she committed the whole company to Heaven in a formula, and disappeared. Gerard to his straw in the very corner, for the guests lay round the sacred stove by seniority, i.e. priority of arrival.

      This punishment was a boon to Gerard, for thus he lay on the shore of odour and stifling heat, instead of in mid ocean.

      He was just dropping off, when he was awaked by a noise, and lo! there was the hind remorselessly shaking and waking guest after guest to ask him whether it was he who had picked up the mistress's feathers.

      "It was I," cried Gerard.

      "Oh, it was you was it?" said the other, and came striding rapidly over the intermediate sleepers. "She bade me say, 'One good turn deserves another,' and so here's your night-cap," and he thrust a great oaken mug under Gerard's nose.

      "I thank her and bless her, here goes—ugh!" and his gratitude ended in a wry face, for the beer was muddy, and had a strange medicinal twang new to the Hollander.

      "Trinke aus!" shouted the hind reproachfully.

      "Enow is as good as a feast," said the youth, Jesuitically.

      The hind cast a look of pity on this stranger who left liquor in his mug. "Ich brings euch," said he and drained it to the bottom.

      And now Gerard turned his face to the wall and pulled up two handfuls of the nice clean straw, and bored in them with his finger, and so made a scabbard, and sheathed his nose in it. And soon they were all asleep: men, maids, wives, and children, all lying higgledy-piggledy, and snoring in a dozen keys like an orchestra slowly tuning; and Gerard's body lay on straw in Germany, and his spirit was away to Sevenbergen.

      When he woke in the morning he found nearly all his fellow-passengers gone. One or two were waiting for dinner, nine o'clock: it was now six. He paid the landlady her demand, two pfenning, or about an English halfpenny and he of the pitchfork demanded trinkgeld, and getting a trifle more than usual, and seeing Gerard eye a foaming milk-pail he had just brought from the cow, hoisted it up bodily to his lips. "Drink your fill, man," said he, and on Gerard offering to pay for the delicious draught, told him in broad patois, that a man might swallow a skinful of milk, or a breakfast of air, without putting hand to pouch. At the door Gerard found his benefactress of last night, and a huge-chested artisan, her husband.

      Gerard thanked her, and in the spirit of the age offered her a creutzer for her pudding.

      But she repulsed his hand quietly. "For what do you take me?" said she, colouring faintly; "we are travellers and strangers the same as you, and bound to feel for those in like plight."

      Then Gerard blushed in his turn and stammered excuses.

      The hulking husband grinned superior to them both.

      "Give the vixen a kiss for her pudding, and cry quits," said he with an air impartial, judge-like and Jove-like.

      Gerard obeyed the loftly behest, and kissed the wife's cheek. "A blessing go with you both, good people," said he.

      "And God speed you, young man!" replied the honest couple: and with that they parted; and never met again in this world.