gets filled—one way or another. The question is: with what?
This void puts us at a vulnerable point in history—we can choose to step into it and become a positive influence, or we can allow more and more apathy and darkness to fill it. There is currently a trend of celebrity influencers; while some of them are indeed creating positive change, those are not typically the ones that the masses are paying attention to over the long term. Huge numbers of people are following those who are loud, large, and spiritually bankrupt. They are voting them into public office. The consequences of doing so are now coming to light, but the masses feel they have nowhere else to turn.
Yet, if enough of us turn inwards to our own capacity to create change—real, lasting, evolutionary change on the planet—we can fill the void, and create a new world rooted in love. The Tao Te Ching’s principles and philosophies support influential thinking and actions that are based in love. This book aims to help you ground the wisdom of the Tao into your everyday reality through practical, daily steps.
As we begin our journey, it’s useful to look at the current situation of old-world influencers: the clear majority of whom came from educational, political, and religious environments consisting of traditional schools, churches, and government-led organizations. The majority of these influencers went on to work in those same establishments, where they generated a great deal of good, and upheld strong values. Yet, now we find these institutions crumbling at our feet, the Millennials and Generation Z having no wish to follow in their footsteps. The reason? The type of influence they stood for is not lasting. Young people are saying ”no” to patterns of behavior that, although they have become the accepted norm over a long period of time, rarely foster real and powerful change within ourselves and in our world.
Three Stages of Influence
Because most of us have witnessed both the positive and negative results of people’s influence over others, let’s first examine the development of influence, and how it shows up in our lives. In my research, I’ve learned that most people go through three stages of influence, and you may notice this progression in yourself. The first stage is self-centered, aligned with the old paradigm of influence, and all about attempting to get something we want. For example, we may have good intentions, such as providing for our young children, qualifying for a first mortgage, or getting that dream job, but the focus is entirely on “me,” and what I need and want for my life. Sometimes, manipulation, greed, control, or another fear-based behavior shows up. Consequently, results are minimal, and often don’t last beyond the individual’s goal.
The second stage of influence happens when the influencer understands that the goal is a “win-win.” They want everyone involved in the decision or action to benefit. Influencers at this stage care deeply enough to ensure that everyone feels that their own desire and goal has been met.
The third stage of influence is when the influencer is working toward a powerful outcome for all—for the planet, the community, and the evolution of humanity. This is the Tao at work—selfless contribution, where the leader’s invisible strength ignites great change. The Tao Te Ching reminds us that the sage “does not claim greatness over anything. He’s not even aware of his own greatness.” Influencers in this third stage are not concerned about getting something for themselves or about being seen or noticed. They no longer require that their personal needs get met; they’re focused on working toward change on the planet. As Satyen Raja, one of my spiritual mentors, shared with me, “The heart of influence is devotion to people’s evolution. That’s the source of it being the purest, and most powerful.”
The Three Stages of Influence
• Self-centeredness
• Win-win Mentality
• Selflessness
The most powerful influencers don’t try to be influencers for egoic reasons. They are not struck by the praise or recognition of having an impact. Raw food advocate and superfoods expert David Wolfe, says, “I don’t like to be after influence for influence’s sake. Influence has to do with our ability to alter the direction that our world is heading. To me, that’s a spiritual directive.” David says he wants to see the world different than it is now, and as an activist, promotes far less use of chemicals, a vast decrease in artificial synthetic materials going into the environment or being disposed of in the environment, and huge changes in methods of farming and interacting with the earth. David’s message and action over the last two decades has transformed many people’s choices, and he continues to influence people worldwide to wake up to their personal and collective choices for themselves, and for the earth. He demonstrates the heart of influence: acting for the good of all, and for our planet.
The Four Pillars
While training people over the past decade to share their messages on stage and reach for their full potential, I came to identify four pillars of influence that determine whether lasting, sustainable change occurs. These pillars are: Power, Presence, Purpose, and Potential. Understanding these four pillars from a spiritual and personal perspective and integrating them into our lives allows the principles of the Tao to naturally become part of everyday life. Real and lasting positive change begins to happen. Movements ignite. People awaken. Miracles become the norm. That’s why I wrote this book.
Life itself is all about navigating personal power, so the first pillar, Power, delves into your relationship with it. In every choice, in every thought, in every action you make, you either accentuate or diminish your power. And each time you do so, you impact not just yourself, but everyone and everything around you. In this book, we will look at all the places where power has been distorted and bring it back to light. By doing so, you’ll see the Butterfly Effect at work: the smallest of choices can set in motion a myriad of consequences. Walking in the Way of the Tao, you’ll learn to choose, so that your personal power has the greatest impact. You’ll learn to understand and activate the power of your words, your thoughts, and your commitment to that which you wish to change.
The second pillar is Presence, and we will explore your relationship to it. Presence is the ability to exist in the moment with no thought of past or future. All great spiritual teachers have noted that the key to fulfillment and joy is to learn to be in the now. It is also critical to developing influence, since people who are present and in the fullness of life as it exists here and now are the same people who are fully trusted, counted on for their wisdom, and able to move mountains with their words. Gandhi, Jesus, and Mother Theresa were all examples of people who shifted the course of history and taught great things with their presence and power. As Gandhi said, “Be the change you wish to see in the world.” And by being that change, we influence others to do the same.
Presence, like power, has always existed within us. In fact, presence is who we are when we strip away all that we are not. When our doubts and fears and illusions of fear-based beliefs are dissolved for good, then presence can be with us always. Presence enables us to experience leadership without experiencing the push and pull of agendas and motivations, and so is foundational to the wisdom teachings of the Tao. In Verse 4 of the Tao Te Ching, Lao Tzu says, “Tao is empty, yet it fills every vessel with endless supply. Tao is hidden, yet it shines in every corner of the universe.”
The third pillar of influence is Purpose, of which there are two types. The first type is our soul’s purpose, that is, what we have come here to do and the potential we’ve come to this world to fully express. When we focus on fulfilling the mission of our purpose, we will either naturally influence others to take up our mission or we will inspire them to pursue and fulfill their own mission. In many cases, our journey will provide clarity to people who feel lost and without purpose themselves. The second type of purpose consists of the reason that we came to this earth—the bigger Divine Purpose we all share—which is to love. Period. No other purpose, but to love.
The final pillar of influence is Potential. What is possible for us, for others, and for our evolution as a species? How open are we to create a new reality? Albert Einstein once said, “I have no special talents. I am only passionately curious.” Developing an openness to potential is a core component of being a change-maker. Please note that I did not say, “disrupter.” In the Way of the Tao, leaders do not push, pull or destroy; they work in flow and harmony to