work out what your foundations are, or what they could be?
I like to use the metaphor of a table — a long table where you sit surrounded by your 12 most important attributes, beliefs and strengths. Chapter by chapter, we will explore each of these 12 seats or attributes. You can consider how they may fit into your life and how each might help you become an influencer who will be effective now and over the long term.
I grew up in country Tasmania as one of 11 children. With our parents we were a large family and at mealtimes we'd cram in around the kitchen table, all 13 of us at a table that was barely long enough to sit 12, but we all squashed in. Looking around at dinnertime, I'd see the people who meant so much to me. All these family members had their different personalities and characteristics. That image is one of the ways I visualise the idea of the 12 characteristics that has become so important in my life.
Looking around your table, you're not seeing big corporations, brands or political parties; you're seeing the faces of real people who matter to you. Think about individuals you know personally who you admire, leaders and influencers in your community or organisation who have inspired you. What makes them stand out as people worth following?
Let me introduce you to the 12 attributes sitting at my table and why I've chosen them above other possible alternatives.
Character before charisma
A lot of the time we follow people who have great charisma and engaging personalities, but I suggest we need to delve deeper to uncover what they believe in and stand for. We need to look at their character.
One time, early in my speaking career, I met someone who had amazing charisma; he was mesmerising and instantly won my full attention. Soon he had become my right-hand man and I was pushing him up on stage constantly as a speaker, and he was really good. I also spent a lot of time training and coaching him, and I was even considering handing over the reins to him to run the business for me. Unwisely, I hadn't looked beyond his impressive presentation to delve deeper into his character and what he actually stood for.
After about a year, I discovered my error the hard way when he set up his own company and tried to steal some of my clients. So right there I got burned. But looking back on that experience, I'm glad it happened. Because it taught me to screen the people I work with more closely. Charisma is a great trait that can take you a long way, but the first seat at my table always goes to Character.
Integrity before brand
Like charisma, brands can be appealing and capture our attention. If you want to succeed in business today, it's practically essential to build your own brand. However, brands are replaceable. They can quickly become outdated, then people lose interest and start looking for the next new thing. Integrity is a quality that lasts. Your own sense of integrity will be your guide in how to live, lead and influence authentically. Before building your brand, ask yourself what you stand for. What will you do to help others and why should others follow you? These days people look to leaders and influencers with integrity before they look to brands, even those that are traditionally trusted. Integrity, not a sparkling brand, has a seat at my table.
Vision before mission
We each need to define our big bold vision so we know where we're heading. Our vision is the thing that's waiting for us at the end of our journey. If it's very ambitious we may never reach it. Our mission gives us a guide to follow day by day, to ensure that every decision we make as leaders will be congruent with our values and vision. Both vision and mission are essential leadership tools, but Vision should always come first; mission follows.
Conscious before decision
We make thousands of decisions every day. Sometimes, whether in our personal life or in our business, we are faced with making a decision that could have huge outcomes. At that level especially, the decision-making process needs to start with being conscious of our values, our goals, the ways we want to convey the significance of what we can offer. Once we are conscious of all the implications, then we can examine the practicalities and finally make our choices. Conscious has an important seat at my table.
Completeness before purpose
Once you are sure of your values and are in alignment with your purpose, that positive feeling will stimulate and motivate you, making you a strong, appealing and compelling person to follow. You can't hope to achieve your purpose if you come to it feeling you're not good enough, or feeling frustrated or even angry. First find your sense of completeness, feel grateful for it and push on to fulfil your purpose. Give Completeness a seat at your table and you might find it life changing.
Trust before influence
Trust, or rather the lack of it, is a significant problem for big businesses, organisations and political parties these days. The major challenge for companies is to win the hearts and minds not only of their consumers but also of their employees. The most effective way to do this is for individuals to demonstrate through everything they do that they are trustworthy. Only then will they be able to influence others effectively. That is why Trust has a seat at my table.
Values before action
Actions are essential. Your days are filled with the actions you take based on the decisions you make — in the workplace and at home. But what happens when your actions lead you to the wrong place in your life, or when you're faced with a major decision and are not sure which way to go? What guides you as a leader and influencer that people want to follow? The answer is your values. It's your values that inform your actions. For that reason, Values occupies one of the 12 seats at my table.
Loyalty before opportunity
Everyone starting out in business needs to be open to new opportunities, some of which can lead to great things. As an entrepreneur myself, I love it when opportunities arise and I get to assess whether to seize them with both hands or to pass. But Opportunity doesn't have a seat at my table. I've given that seat to Loyalty. So often in life and your career you'll see how important it is to stay loyal to your vision, to your expertise, to your staff and mentors, and not to pass over them in order to chase the next new thing. There will be many times when you will benefit from staying loyal rather than running towards that shiny new opportunity.
Significance before success
Success is great. We celebrate successful people, look up to them and follow them. But success can crash overnight. Significance lasts. If we have made a positive impact on people's lives, we will always be significant to them, even after we're gone. I wish for your success, but my respect will be based on your significance. So Significance belongs at my table.
Small before big
In an era when the environment is crying out for our care, when millions of people have too little while a few have far too much, there are so many reasons why we should choose small before big. One is really practical: when we do the small things well, giving them our full attention, we often find they grow into something much bigger, something that has a major impact on our life or business. I celebrate Small and welcome it to my table.
Why before how
Whatever task we take on, we need to start by finding out why we need to do it. Only then can we work out how to do it. Our teams will come on board only once they