William Harrison Ainsworth

The Essential Works of William Harrison Ainsworth


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undoubtedly,” replied Palmer, in the same grave tone, which might have passed for banter, had Jack ever bantered. “I’ll maintain and prove it. I don’t see how he can be otherwise. It is as necessary for a man to be a gentleman before he can turn highwayman, as it is for a doctor to have his diploma, or an attorney his certificate. Some of the finest gentlemen of their day, as Captain Lovelace, Hind, Hannum, and Dudley, were eminent on the road, and they set the fashion. Ever since their day a real highwayman would consider himself disgraced, if he did not conduct himself in every way like a gentleman. Of course, there are pretenders in this line, as in everything else. But these are only exceptions, and prove the rule. What are the distinguishing characteristics of a fine gentleman? — perfect knowledge of the world — perfect independence of character — notoriety — command of cash — and inordinate success with the women. You grant all these premises? First, then, it is part of a highwayman’s business to be thoroughly acquainted with the world. He is the easiest and pleasantest fellow going. There is Tom King, for example: he is the handsomest man about town, and the best-bred fellow on the road. Then whose inclinations are so uncontrolled as the highwayman’s, so long as the mopuses last? who produces so great an effect by so few words? —’Stand and deliver!‘ is sure to arrest attention. Every one is captivated by an address so taking. As to money, he wins a purse of a hundred guineas as easily as you would the same sum from the faro table. And wherein lies the difference? only in the name of the game. Who so little need of a banker as he? all he has to apprehend is a check — all he has to draw is a trigger. As to the women, they dote upon him: not even your red-coat is so successful. Look at a highwayman mounted on his flying steed, with his pistols in his holsters, and his mask upon his face. What can be a more gallant sight? The clatter of his horse’s heels is like music to his ear — he is in full quest — he shouts to the fugitive horseman to stay — the other flies all the faster — what chase can be half so exciting as that? Suppose he overtakes his prey, which ten to one he will, how readily his summons to deliver is obeyed! how satisfactory is the appropriation of a lusty purse or corpulent pocket-book! — getting the brush is nothing to it. How tranquilly he departs, takes off his hat to his accommodating acquaintance, wishes him a pleasant journey, and disappears across the heath! England, sir, has reason to be proud of her highwaymen. They are peculiar to her clime, and are as much before the brigand of Italy, the contrabandist of Spain, or the cut-purse of France — as her sailors are before all the rest of the world. The day will never come, I hope, when we shall degenerate into the footpad, and lose our Night Errantry. Even the French borrow from us — they have only one highwayman of eminence, and he learnt and practised his art in England.”

      “And who was he, may I ask?” said Coates.

      “Claude Du-Val,” replied Jack; “and though a Frenchman, he was a deuced fine fellow in his day — quite a tip-top macaroni — he could skip and twirl like a figurant, warble like an opera-singer, and play the flageolet better than any man of his day — he always carried a lute in his pocket, along with his snappers. And then his dress — it was quite beautiful to see how smartly he was rigg’d out, all velvet and lace; and even with his vizard on his face, the ladies used to cry out to see him. Then he took a purse with the air and grace of a receiver-general. All the women adored him — and that, bless their pretty faces! was the best proof of his gentility. I wish he’d not been a Mounseer. The women never mistake. They can always discover the true gentlemen, and they were all, of every degree, from the countess to the kitchen-maid, over head and ears in love with him.”

      “But he was taken, I suppose?” asked Coates.

      “Ay,” responded Jack, “the women were his undoing, as they’ve been many a brave fellow’s before, and will be again.” Touched by which reflection, Jack became for once in his life sentimental, and sighed. “Poor Du-Val! he was seized at the Hole-in-the-Wall in Chandos-street by the bailiff of Westminster, when dead drunk, his liquor having been drugged by his dells — and was shortly afterwards hanged at Tyburn.”

      “It was thousand pities,” said Mr. Coates, with a sneer, “that so fine a gentleman should come to so ignominious an end!”

      “Quite the contrary,” returned Jack. “As his biographer, Doctor Pope, properly remarks, ‘Who is there worthy of the name of man, that would not prefer such a death before a mean, solitary, inglorious life?’ By-the-by, Titus, as we’re upon the subject, if you like I’ll sing you a song about highwaymen.”

      “I should like it of all things,” replied Titus, who entertained a very favorable opinion of Jack’s vocal powers, and was by no means an indifferent performer; “only let it be in a minor key.”

      Jack required no further encouragement, but disregarding the hints and looks of Coates, sang with much unction the following ballad to a good old tune, then very popular — the merit of which “nobody can deny.”

      A CHAPTER OF HIGHWAYMEN

      Of every rascal of every kind,

       The most notorious to my mind,

      But the pleasantest coxcomb among them all

       For lute, coranto, and madrigal,

      And Tobygloak never a coach could rob,

       Could lighten a pocket, or empty a fob,

      Nor did housebreaker ever deal harder knocks

       On the stubborn lid of a good strong box,

      A blither fellow on broad highway,

       Did never with oath bid traveller stay,

      And in roguery naught could exceed the tricks

       Of Gettings and Grey, and the five or six

      Nor could any so handily break a lock

       As Sheppard, who stood on the Newgate dock,

      Nor did highwaymen ever before possess

       For ease, for security, danger, distress,

       Such a mare as Dick Turpin’s Black Bess! Black Bess!

       Which nobody can deny.

      “Pshaw!” exclaimed Jack, in disgust, “the gentlemen I speak of never maltreated any one, except in self-defence.”

      “Maybe not,” replied Titus; “I’ll not dispute the point — but these Rapparees were true brothers of the blade, and gentlemen every inch. I’ll just sing you a song I made