A. A. Milne

Once a Week


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it, do you suppose, for the sunset effects at eleven o'clock in the morning, or is it that you may look after the rope properly?"

      "I'm awfully sorry, Miss Cardew," said Simpson, feeling that somebody ought to apologize for something and knowing that Gaspard wouldn't, "but I expect it will be all right now."

      We settled down again. Once more Gaspard cursed his horses, and once more they started off bravely. And this time we went with them.

      "The idea all along," I explained to Miss Cardew.

      "I rather suspected it," she said. Apparently she has a suspicious mind.

      After the little descent at the start, we went uphill slowly for a couple of miles, and then more rapidly over the level. We had driven over the same road in a sleigh, coming from the station, and had been bitterly cold and extremely bored. Why our present position should be so much more enjoyable I didn't quite see.

      "It's the expectation of an accident," said Archie. "At any moment somebody may fall off. Good."

      "My dear old chap," said Simpson, turning round to take part in the conversation, "why anybody should fall off——"

      We went suddenly round a corner, and quietly and without any fuss whatever Simpson left his luge and rolled on to the track. Luckily any possibility of a further accident was at once avoided. There was no panic at all. Archie kicked the body temporarily out of the way; after which Dahlia leant over and pushed it thoughtfully to the side of the road. Myra warded it off with a leg as she neared it; with both hands I helped it into the deep snow from which it had shown a tendency to emerge; Miss Cardew put a foot out at it for safety; and Thomas patted it gently on the head as the end of the "tail" went past. …

      As soon as we had recovered our powers of speech—all except Miss Cardew, who was in hysterics—we called upon Gaspard to stop. He indicated with the back of his neck that it would be dangerous to stop just then; and it was not until we were at the bottom of the hill, nearly a mile from the place where Simpson left us, that the procession halted, and gave itself up again to laughter.

      "I hope he is not hurt," said Dahlia, wiping the tears from her eyes.

      "He wouldn't spoil a good joke like that by getting hurt," said Myra confidently. "He's much too much of a sportsman."

      "Why did he do it?" said Thomas.

      "He suddenly remembered he hadn't packed his safety-razor. He's half-way back to the hotel by now."

      Miss Cardew remained in hysterics.

      Ten minutes later a brilliant sunset was observed approaching from the north. A little later it was seen to be a large dish of apricots and cream.

      "He draws near," said Archie. "Now then, let's be stern with him."

      At twenty yards' range Simpson began to talk. His trot had heated him slightly.

      "I say," he said excitedly. "You——"

      Myra shook her head at him.

      "Not done, Samuel," she said reproachfully.

      "Not what, Myra? What not——"

      "You oughtn't to leave us like that without telling us."

      "After all," said Archie, "we are all one party, and we are supposed to keep together. If you prefer to go about by yourself, that's all right; but if we go to the trouble of arranging something for the whole party——"

      "You might have caused a very nasty accident," I pointed out. "If you were in a hurry, you had only to say a word to Gaspard and he would have stopped for you to alight. Now I begin to understand why you kept cutting the rope at the start."

      "You have sent Miss Cardew into hysterics by your conduct," said Dahlia.

      Miss Cardew gave another peal. Simpson looked at her in dismay.

      "I say, Miss Cardew, I'm most awfully sorry. I really didn't—— I say, Dahlia," he went on confidentially, "oughtn't we to do something about this? Rub her feet with snow or—I mean, I know there's something you do when people have hysterics. It's rather serious if they go on. Don't you burn feathers under their nose?" He began to feel in his pockets. "I wonder if Gaspard's got a feather?"

      With a great effort Miss Cardew pulled herself together. "It's all right, thank you," she said in a stifled voice.

      "Then let's get on," said Archie.

      We resumed our seats once more. Archie took Dahlia's feet on his lap. Myra took mine. Miss Cardew took Thomas's. Simpson clung tight to his luge with both hands.

      "Right!" cried Archie.

      Gaspard swore at his horses. They pulled bravely. The rope snapped—and they trotted gaily up the hill with Gaspard.

      We hurried after them with the luges. …

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      "For our last night they might at least have had a dance," said Myra, "even if there was no public presentation."

      "As we had hoped," I admitted.

      "What is a gymkhana, anyway?" asked Thomas.

      "A few little competitions," said Archie. "One must cater for the chaperons sometimes. You are all entered for the Hat-making and the Feather-blowing—Dahlia thought it would amuse you."

      "At Cambridge," I said reminiscently, "I once blew the feather 119 feet 7 inches. Unfortunately I stepped outside the circle. My official record is 2 feet."

      "Did you ever trim a hat at Cambridge?" asked Myra. "Because you've got to do one for me to-night."

      I had not expected this. My view of the competition had been that I should have to provide the face and that she would have to invent some suitable frame for it.

      "I'm full of ideas," I lied.

      Nine o'clock found a small row of us prepared to blow the feather. The presidential instructions were that we had to race our feather across a chalk-line at the end of the room, anybody touching his feather to be disqualified.

      "In the air or on the floor?" asked Simpson earnestly.

      "Just as you like," said the President kindly, and came round with the bag.

      I selected Percy with care—a dear little feather about half an inch long and of a delicate whity-brown colour. I should have known him again anywhere.

      "Go!" said the President. I was rather excited, with the result that my first blow was much too powerful for Percy. He shot up to the ceiling and, in spite of all I could do, seemed inclined to stay there. Anxiously I waited below with my mouth open; he came slowly down at last; and in my eagerness I played my second just a shade too soon. It missed him. My third (when I was ready for it) went harmlessly over his head. A frantic fourth and fifth helped him downwards … and in another moment my beautiful Percy was on the floor. I dropped on my knees and played my sixth vigorously. He swirled to the left; I was after him like a shot … and crashed into Thomas. We rolled over in a heap.

      "Sorry!" we apologized as we got back on to our hands and knees.

      Thomas went on blowing.

      "Where's my feather?" I said.

      Thomas was now two yards ahead, blowing like anything. A terrible suspicion darted through my mind.

      "Thomas," I said, "you've got my feather."

      He made no answer. I scrambled after him.

      "That's Percy," I said. "I should know him anywhere. You're blowing Percy. It's very bad form to blow another man's feather. If it got about, you would be cut by the county. Give me back my feather, Thomas."

      "How