Various

The Universal Reciter


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I won't let you go so aisy as all that, as cunnin' as you think yourself;' and with that he made a dart out o' bed, and run over to the door, and got betune it and the fox, 'And now,' says he, 'your bread's baked, my buck, and maybe my lord won't have a fine run out o' you, and the dogs at your brish every yard, you morodin' thief, and the divil mind you,' says he, 'for your impidence—for sure, if you hadn't the impidence of a highwayman's horse it's not into my very house, undher my nose, you'd daar for to come:' and with that he began to whistle for the dogs; and the fox, that stood eyein' him all the time while he was spakin', began to think it was time to be joggin' whin he heard the whistle—and says the fox to himself, 'Troth, indeed, you think yourself a mighty great ranger now,' says he, 'and you think you're very cute, but upon my tail, and that's a big oath, I'd be long sorry to let such a mallet-headed bog-throtter as yourself take a dirty advantage o' me, and I'll engage,' says the fox, 'I'll make you lave the door soon and suddint,'—and with that he turned to where the ranger's brogues was lyin' hard by beside the fire, and, what would you think, but the fox tuk one o' the brogues, and wint over to the fire, and threw it into it.

      "'I think that'll make you start,' says the fox.

      "'Divil resave the start,' says the ranger—'that won't do, my buck,' says he, 'the brogue may burn to cindhers,' says he, 'but out o' this I won't stir;' and thin, puttin' his fingers into his mouth, he gev a blast of a whistle you'd hear a mile off, and shouted for the dogs.

      "'So that won't do,' says the fox—'well, I must thry another offer,' says he, and with that he tuk up the other brogue, and threw it into the fire too.

      "'There, now,' says he, 'you may keep the other company,' says he; 'and there's a pair o' you now, as the divil said to his knee-buckles.'

      "'Oh, you thievin' varment,' says the ranger, 'you won't lave me a tack to my feet; but no matter,' says he, 'your head's worth more nor a pair o' brogues to me any day, and by the Piper of Blessintown, you're money in my pocket this minit,' says he: and with that, the fingers was in his mouth agin, and he was goin' to whistle, whin, what would you think, but up sets the fox on his hunkers, and puts his two fore-paws into his mouth, makin' game o' the ranger—(bad luck to the lie I tell you.)

      "'Well, the ranger, and no wondher, although in a rage as he was, couldn't help laughin' at the thought o' the fox mockin' him, and, by dad, he tuk sitch a fit o' laughin' that he couldn't whistle—and that was the 'cuteness o' the fox to gain time; but whin his first laugh was over, the ranger recovered himself, and gev another whistle; and so says the fox, 'By my soul,' says he, 'I think it wouldn't be good for my health to stay here much longer, and I mustn't be triflin' with that blackguard ranger any more,' says he, 'and I must make him sensible that it is time to let me go, and though he hasn't understandin' to be sorry for his brogues, I'll go bail I'll make him lave that,' says he, 'before he'd say sparables'—and with that what do you think the fox done? By all that's good—and the ranger himself told me out iv his own mouth, and said he would never have b'lieved it, ownly he seen it—the fox tuk a lighted piece iv a log out o' the blazin' fire, and run over wid it to the ranger's bed, and was goin' to throw it into the sthraw, and burn him out of house and home; so when the ranger seen that he gev a shout out iv him—

      "But before he wint, the ranger gev me his oath that the fox turned round and gev him the most contemptible look he ever got in his life, and showed every tooth in his head with laughin', and at last he put out his tongue at him, as much as to say—'You've missed me like your mammy's blessin',' and off wid him, like a flash o' lightnin'."

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      FORRESTER.

      [It is hardly necessary to say that too much tenderness cannot be imparted to the voice while reading these beautiful lines. The heart that recalls a departed mother's memory will be the best monitor.]

      G

      IVE me my old seat, mother,

      With my head upon thy knee;

      I've passed through many a changing scene,

      Since thus I sat by thee.

      Oh! let me look into thine eyes;

      Their meek, soft, loving light

      Falls like a gleam of holiness,

      Upon my heart, to-night.

      I've not been long away, mother;

      Few suns have risen and set,

      Since last the tear-drop on thy cheek,

      My lips in kisses met.

      'Tis but a little time, I know,

      But very long it seems;

      Though every night I came to thee,

      Dear mother, in my dreams.

      The world has kindly dealt, mother,

      By the child thou lov'st so well;

      The prayers have circled round her path;

      And 'twas their holy spell

      Which made that path so dearly bright;

      Which strewed the roses there;

      Which gave the light, and cast the balm

      On every breath of air.

      I bear a happy heart, mother;

      A happier never beat;

      And, even now, new buds of hope

      Are bursting at my feet.

      Oh! mother! life may be a dream;

      But if such dreams are given,

      While at the portals thus we stand,

      What are the truths of Heaven?

      I bear a happy heart, mother!

      Yet, when fond eyes I see,

      And hear soft tones and winning words,

      I ever think of thee.

      And then, the tears my spirit weeps

      Unbidden fill my eye;

      And, like a houseless dove, I long

      Unto thy breast to fly.

      Then I am very sad, mother,

      I'm very sad and lone:

      O! there's no heart whose inmost fold

      Opes to me like thine own!

      Though sunny smiles wreath blooming lips,

      While love-tones meet my ear;

      My mother, one fond glance of thine

      Were thousand times more dear.

      Then with a closer clasp, mother,

      Now hold me to thy heart:

      I'll feel it beating 'gainst my own,

      Once more before we part.

      And mother, to this love-lit spot,

      When I am far away,

      Come oft—too oft thou canst not come!

      And for thy darling pray.