of old) are blown up on a sudden; and as Actaeon was by his hounds, devoured by their kinsmen, friends, and multitude of followers. [698]It is a wonder that Paulus Jovius relates of our northern countries, what an infinite deal of meat we consume on our tables; that I may truly say, 'tis not bounty, not hospitality, as it is often abused, but riot and excess, gluttony and prodigality; a mere vice; it brings in debt, want, and beggary, hereditary diseases, consumes their fortunes, and overthrows the good temperature of their bodies. To this I might here well add their inordinate expense in building, those fantastical houses, turrets, walks, parks, &c. gaming, excess of pleasure, and that prodigious riot in apparel, by which means they are compelled to break up house, and creep into holes. Sesellius in his commonwealth of [699]France, gives three reasons why the French nobility were so frequently bankrupts: "First, because they had so many lawsuits and contentions one upon another, which were tedious and costly; by which means it came to pass, that commonly lawyers bought them out of their possessions. A second cause was their riot, they lived beyond their means, and were therefore swallowed up by merchants." (La Nove, a French writer, yields five reasons of his countrymen's poverty, to the same effect almost, and thinks verily if the gentry of France were divided into ten parts, eight of them would be found much impaired, by sales, mortgages, and debts, or wholly sunk in their estates.) "The last was immoderate excess in apparel, which consumed their revenues." How this concerns and agrees with our present state, look you. But of this elsewhere. As it is in a man's body, if either head, heart, stomach, liver, spleen, or any one part be misaffected, all the rest suffer with it: so is it with this economical body. If the head be naught, a spendthrift, a drunkard, a whoremaster, a gamester, how shall the family live at ease? [700]Ipsa si cupiat solus servare, prorsus, non potest hanc familiam, as Demea said in the comedy, Safety herself cannot save it. A good, honest, painful man many times hath a shrew to his wife, a sickly, dishonest, slothful, foolish, careless woman to his mate, a proud, peevish flirt, a liquorish, prodigal quean, and by that means all goes to ruin: or if they differ in nature, he is thrifty, she spends all, he wise, she sottish and soft; what agreement can there be? what friendship? Like that of the thrush and swallow in Aesop, instead of mutual love, kind compellations, whore and thief is heard, they fling stools at one another's heads. [701]Quae intemperies vexat hanc familiam? All enforced marriages commonly produce such effects, or if on their behalves it be well, as to live and agree lovingly together, they may have disobedient and unruly children, that take ill courses to disquiet them, [702]"their son is a thief, a spendthrift, their daughter a whore;" a step [703]mother, or a daughter-in-law distempers all; [704]or else for want of means, many torturers arise, debts, dues, fees, dowries, jointures, legacies to be paid, annuities issuing out, by means of which, they have not wherewithal to maintain themselves in that pomp as their predecessors have done, bring up or bestow their children to their callings, to their birth and quality, [705]and will not descend to their present fortunes. Oftentimes, too, to aggravate the rest, concur many other inconveniences, unthankful friends, decayed friends, bad neighbours, negligent servants [706]servi furaces, Versipelles, callidi, occlusa sibi mille clavibus reserant, furtimque; raptant, consumunt, liguriunt; casualties, taxes, mulcts, chargeable offices, vain expenses, entertainments, loss of stock, enmities, emulations, frequent invitations, losses, suretyship, sickness, death of friends, and that which is the gulf of all, improvidence, ill husbandry, disorder and confusion, by which means they are drenched on a sudden in their estates, and at unawares precipitated insensibly into an inextricable labyrinth of debts, cares, woes, want, grief, discontent and melancholy itself.
I have done with families, and will now briefly run over some few sorts and conditions of men. The most secure, happy, jovial, and merry in the world's esteem are princes and great men, free from melancholy: but for their cares, miseries, suspicions, jealousies, discontents, folly and madness, I refer you to Xenophon's Tyrannus, where king Hieron discourseth at large with Simonides the poet, of this subject. Of all others they are most troubled with perpetual fears, anxieties, insomuch, that as he said in [707]Valerius, if thou knewest with what cares and miseries this robe were stuffed, thou wouldst not stoop to take it up. Or put case they be secure and free from fears and discontents, yet they are void [708]of reason too oft, and precipitate in their actions, read all our histories, quos de stultis prodidere stulti, Iliades, Aeneides, Annales, and what is the subject?
"Stultorum regum, et populorum continet aestus."
"The giddy tumults and the foolish rage
Of kings and people."
How mad they are, how furious, and upon small occasions, rash and inconsiderate in their proceedings, how they dote, every page almost will witness,
———"delirant reges, plectuntur Achivi."
"When doting monarchs urge
Unsound resolves, their subjects feel the scourge."
Next in place, next in miseries and discontents, in all manner of hair-brain actions, are great men, procul a Jove, procul a fulmine, the nearer the worse. If they live in court, they are up and down, ebb and flow with their princes' favours, Ingenium vultu statque caditque suo, now aloft, tomorrow down, as [709]Polybius describes them, "like so many casting counters, now of gold, tomorrow of silver, that vary in worth as the computant will; now they stand for units, tomorrow for thousands; now before all, and anon behind." Beside, they torment one another with mutual factions, emulations: one is ambitious, another enamoured, a third in debt, a prodigal, overruns his fortunes, a fourth solicitous with cares, gets nothing, &c. But for these men's discontents, anxieties, I refer you to Lucian's Tract, de mercede conductis, [710]Aeneas Sylvius (libidinis et stultitiae servos, he calls them), Agrippa, and many others.
Of philosophers and scholars priscae sapientiae dictatores, I have already spoken in general terms, those superintendents of wit and learning, men above men, those refined men, minions of the muses,
[711]———"mentemque habere queis bonam Et esse [712]corculis datum est."———
[713]These acute and subtle sophisters, so much honoured, have as much need of hellebore as others.—[714]O medici mediam pertundite venam. Read Lucian's Piscator, and tell how he esteemed them; Agrippa's Tract of the vanity of Sciences; nay read their own works, their absurd tenets, prodigious paradoxes, et risum teneatis amici? You shall find that of Aristotle true, nullum magnum ingenium sine mixtura dementiae, they have a worm as well as others; you shall find a fantastical strain, a fustian, a bombast, a vainglorious humour, an affected style, &c., like a prominent thread in an uneven woven cloth, run parallel throughout their works. And they that teach wisdom, patience, meekness, are the veriest dizzards, harebrains, and most discontent. [715]"In the multitude of wisdom is grief, and he that increaseth wisdom, increaseth sorrow." I need not quote mine author; they that laugh and contemn others, condemn the world of folly, deserve to be mocked, are as giddy-headed, and lie as open as any other. [716]Democritus, that common flouter of folly, was ridiculous himself, barking Menippus, scoffing Lucian, satirical Lucilius, Petronius, Varro, Persius, &c., may be censured with the rest, Loripedem rectus derideat, Aethiopem albus. Bale, Erasmus, Hospinian, Vives, Kemnisius, explode as a vast ocean of obs and sols, school divinity. [717]A labyrinth of intricable questions, unprofitable contentions, incredibilem delirationem, one calls it. If school divinity be so censured, subtilis [718]Scotus lima veritatis, Occam irrefragabilis, cujus ingenium vetera omnia ingenia subvertit, &c. Baconthrope, Dr. Resolutus, and Corculum Theolgiae, Thomas himself, Doctor [719]Seraphicus, cui dictavit Angelus, &c. What shall become of humanity? Ars stulta, what can she plead? what can her followers say for themselves? Much learning, [720] cere-diminuit-brum, hath cracked their sconce, and taken such root, that tribus Anticyris caput insanabile, hellebore itself can do no good, nor that renowned [721]lantern of Epictetus, by which if any man studied, he should be as wise as he was. But all will not serve; rhetoricians, in ostentationem loquacitatis multa agitant, out of their volubility of tongue, will talk much to no purpose, orators can persuade other men what they will, quo volunt, unde volunt, move, pacify, &c., but cannot settle their own brains, what saith Tully? Malo indisertam prudentiam, quam loquacem, stultitiam; and as [722]Seneca seconds him, a wise man's oration should not be polite or solicitous. [723]Fabius esteems no better of most of them, either in speech, action, gesture, than as men beside