who invented it, the point is that it's women who worship it. A woman's got a sort of mystical feeling towards money. Good and evil in a woman's mind mean simply money and no money. Look at you and me. You won't sleep with me, simply and solely because I've got no money. Yes, that is the reason. (He squeezed her arm to silence her.) You admitted it only a minute ago. And if I had a decent income you'd go to bed with me tomorrow. It's not because you're mercenary. You don't want me to pay you for sleeping with me. It's not so crude as that. But you've got that deep-down mystical feeling that somehow a man without money isn't worthy of you. He's a weakling, a sort of half-man—that's how you feel. Hercules, god of strength and god of money—you'll find that in Lemprière. It's women who keep all mythologies going. Women!'
'Women!' echoed Rosemary on a different note. 'I hate the way men are always talking about women. "Women do this," and "Women do that"—as though all women were exactly the same!'
'Of course all women are the same! What does any woman want except a safe income and two babies and a semi-detached villa in Putney with an aspidistra in the window?'
'Oh, you and your aspidistras!'
'On the contrary, your aspidistras. You're the sex that cultivates them.'
She squeezed his arm and burst out laughing. She was really extraordinarily good-natured. Besides, what he was saying was such palpable nonsense that it did not even exasperate her. Gordon's diatribes against women were in reality a kind of perverse joke; indeed, the whole sex-war is at bottom only a joke. For some reason it is great fun to pose as a feminist or an anti-feminist according to your sex. As they walked on they began a violent argument upon the eternal and idiotic question of Man versus Woman. The moves in this argument—for they had it as often as they met—were always very much the same. Men are brutes and women are soulless, and women have always been kept in subjection and they jolly well ought to be kept in subjection, and look at Patient Griselda and look at Lady Astor, and what about polygamy and Hindu widows, and what about Mother Pankhurst's piping days when every decent woman wore mousetraps on her garters and couldn't look at a man without feeling her right hand itch for a castrating knife? Gordon and Rosemary never grew tired of this kind of thing. Each laughed with delight at the other's absurdities. There was a merry war between them. Even as they disputed, arm in arm, they pressed their bodies delightedly together. They were very happy. Indeed, they adored one another. Each was to the other a standing joke and an object infinitely precious. Presently a red and blue haze of Neon lights appeared in the distance. They had reached the beginning of the Tottenham Court Road. Gordon put his arm round her waist and turned her to the right, down a darkish side-street. They were so happy together that they had got to kiss. They stood clasped together under the lamp-post, still laughing, two enemies breast to breast. She rubbed her cheek against his.
'Gordon, you are such a dear old ass! I can't help loving you, scrubby jaw and all.'
'Do you really?'
'Really and truly.'
Her arms still round him, she leaned a little backwards, pressing her belly against his with a sort of innocent voluptuousness.
'Life is worth living, isn't it, Gordon?'
'Sometimes.'
'If only we could meet a bit oftener! Sometimes I don't see you for weeks together.'
'I know. It's bloody. If you knew how I hate my evenings alone!'
'One never seems to have time for anything. I don't even leave that beastly office till nearly seven. What do you do with yourself on Sundays, Gordon?'
'Oh, God! Moon about and look miserable, like everyone else.'
'Why not let's go out for a walk in the country sometimes. Then we could have all day together. Next Sunday, for instance?'
The words chilled him. They brought back the thought of money, which he had succeeded in putting out of his mind for half an hour past. A trip into the country would cost money, far more than he could possibly afford. He said in a non-committal tone that transferred the whole thing to the realm of abstraction:
'Of course, it's not too bad in Richmond Park on Sundays. Or even on Hampstead Heath. Especially if you go in the mornings before the crowds get there.'
'Oh, but let's go right out into the country! Somewhere in Surrey, for instance, or to Burnham Beeches. It's so lovely at this time of year, with all the dead leaves on the ground, and you can walk all day and hardly meet a soul. We'll walk for miles and miles and have dinner at a pub. It would be such fun. Do let's!'
Blast! The money-business was coming back. A trip even as far as Burnham Beeches would cost all of ten bob. He did some hurried mental arithmetic. Five bob he might manage, and Julia would 'lend' him five; give him five, that was. At the same moment he remembered his oath, constantly renewed and always broken, not to 'borrow' money off Julia. He said in the same casual tone as before:
'It would be rather fun. I should think we might manage it. I'll let you know later in the week, anyway.'
They came out of the side-street, still arm in arm. There was a pub on the corner. Rosemary stood on tiptoe, and, clinging to Gordon's arm to support herself, managed to look over the frosted lower half of the window.
'Look, Gordon, there's a clock in there. It's nearly half past nine. Aren't you getting frightfully hungry?'
'No,' he said, instantly and untruthfully.
'I am. I'm simply starving. Let's go and have something to eat somewhere.'
Money again! One moment more, and he must confess that he had only four and fourpence in the world—four and fourpence to last till Friday.
'I couldn't eat anything,' he said. 'I might manage a drink, I dare say. Let's go and have some coffee or something. I expect we'll find a Lyons open.'
'Oh, don't let's go to a Lyons! I know such a nice little Italian restaurant, only just down the road. We'll have Spaghetti Napolitaine and a bottle of red wine. I adore spaghetti. Do let's!'
His heart sank. It was no good. He would have to own up. Supper at the Italian restaurant could not possibly cost less than five bob for the two of them. He said almost sullenly:
'It's about time I was getting home, as a matter of fact.'
'Oh, Gordon! Already? Why?'
'Oh, well! If you must know, I've only got four and fourpence in the world. And it's got to last till Friday.'
Rosemary stopped short. She was so angry that she pinched his arm with all her strength, meaning to hurt him and punish him.
'Gordon, you are an ass! You're a perfect idiot! You're the most unspeakable idiot I've ever seen!'
'Why am I an idiot?'
'Because what does it matter whether you've got any money? I'm asking you to have supper with me.'
He freed his arm from hers and stood away from her. He did not want to look her in the face.
'What! Do you think I'd go to a restaurant and let you pay for my food?'
'But why not?'
'Because one can't do that sort of thing. It isn't done.'
'It "isn't done"! You'll be saying it's "not cricket" in another moment. What "isn't done"?'
'Letting you pay for my meals. A man pays for a woman, a woman doesn't pay for a man.'
'Oh, Gordon! Are we living in the reign of Queen Victoria?'
'Yes, we are, as far as that kind of thing's concerned. Ideas don't change so quickly.'
'But my ideas have changed.'
'No, they haven't. You think they have, but they haven't. You've been brought up as a woman, and you can't help behaving like a woman, however much you don't want to.'
'But what do you mean by behaving like a woman, anyway?'
'I tell you every woman's the same when it comes to a thing like this. A woman despises a man