and when she lifted the bottle from the floor, its bottom, along with its contents, remained there, leaving Fallon holding a bottomless, empty bottle.
“Tyler,” James said, his voice so quiet and controlled it was brittle.
“I’m sure it was an accident,” she said, not sure what else to say, or do.
“I’m sure it was not,” James responded.
“Maybe we should ask Tyler,” Fallon said, quite surprised that he seemed totally unaffected by the whole matter. Most children his age would be scared, on the verge of tears. But Tyler had his shoulders squared, his jaw set, his arms folded belligerently across his chest. Getting ready to do battle was what Fallon immediately thought of. This child was getting ready to square off with someone. “Was it an accident, Tyler?” she asked, suddenly feeling protective of the boy.
He didn’t answer. Instead, he stared straight ahead at the hall, barely blinking.
“Tyler?” she asked again.
Again, no response. She glanced up at James, who seemed in agony. Then she glanced back at Tyler, and saw just a flash of that same agony, and the need to come to his defense in some way, to make the situation a little better for him, overtook her. “Look, Tyler, I’m not going to punish you for breaking my shelf. But here’s what we’re going to do. I’m going to go find some rags so you can clean up the lotions and everything else that spilled on the floor. And while I’m doing that, stand back so we can get the glass picked up. We don’t want you cutting yourself while you’re cleaning.”
“We’ve been having a rough time,” James admitted, not so much in defense of what Tyler had done as in explanation.
“I guess you have. And it looks to me like Tyler…” Before she could finish, James’s cellphone rang, and he seemed almost grateful for the interruption. Too grateful, she decided as James walked away, leaving her there to make sure Tyler didn’t do something to hurt himself. Half a minute later, James returned, red-faced.
“Look, I know I don’t have a right to ask this, but…I have an emergency up on Pine Ridge, a child with a broken leg, and I really can’t take Tyler with me. He’s…” He glanced down at the boy. “He’s having a rough time right now, as you’ve already seen, and I don’t have anyplace else for him to stay yet. He’s been through three babysitters in as many days, and I haven’t had time to find someone else to look after him while I’m at work. I wouldn’t normally impose on you, but it may be a compound fracture, and I need to get the child stabilized before transport…”
“Just go,” she said, not sure why. “Take care of your patient, and I’ll look after Tyler.” She glanced down at Tyler, who was eyeing another hanging shelf and trying to inch his way in its direction without being noticed. “But only for a little while.”
“You don’t know how much I appreciate that,” James said, the expression on his face turning into genuine relief. “We’ll talk when I get back, OK? I have so much I need to tell you.”
Fallon reached out and took hold of Tyler’s arm to keep him from moving any closer to his next target. “When you know how long this is going to take, call me, will you?”
Instinctively, James bent to kiss Fallon’s cheek, but she jerked away from him. So he simply nodded then bent to Tyler who jerked away, too. “You be good, and don’t break anything else, you hear me?”
Tyler stared him in the eye, not defiantly, though. And didn’t answer. After several seconds James straightened up. “Like I said, we’ll talk,” he said, then turned and left, leaving Fallon alone with what she knew was going to turn the rest of her day into a royal disaster.
“So, Tyler,” she said, pulling him out into the hall, “tell me why you broke my shelf, and why, right this very minute, you’re thinking about breaking my other shelf.”
The boy’s eyes opened a bit wider, as if surprised that she could anticipate what he was thinking.
Fallon laughed. “You do want to pull down the other shelf, don’t you? Are you surprised that I know what you want to do?”
Naturally, he didn’t respond. But that didn’t surprise her. The answer was in his eyes. Big, beautiful eyes, like his father’s. So beautiful she ached with longing for what she’d lost. “So I don’t suppose I can trust you to stand here and not go back into the bathroom while I go find a broom to clean up the broken glass, can I?” Silly asking the question when she already knew the answer. “Which means you get to go with me.” She pointed in the direction of the utility room, but Tyler kept his eyes glued to the wall across from him. What kind of trauma had done that to him? What kind of upset had caused such a young child to be so removed? James hadn’t told her much. Mostly, she’d heard just the anger from him over being left out of Tyler’s life, over the things he missed. Anger that sank to the heart of what she’d done to him herself, how she’d left him out, too.
And seeing Tyler, even with his problems, reminded her of how selfish she’d been. She’d made a choice that couldn’t be undone. Fought hard then lost. And never included James. It was the hardest thing she’d ever done because she’d loved that baby, wanted that baby. Should have been strong enough to carry that baby to term. But she hadn’t been, and the day her doctor had come to her and told her it was over…
Now she ached that their baby wasn’t in her arms. “Well, Tyler,” she said, trying to shake off the glum mood settling over her, “I don’t know if you’re hungry, but I am. And I think ice cream is a good afternoon snack. Care to have some with me?” she asked.
Naturally, Tyler didn’t answer. So Fallon decided to ignore him and hope that once she got the ice cream out of the freezer, he’d come to the kitchen. Bad reasoning, though. She’d been in the kitchen less than a minute when she heard a crash. A loud crash coming from the bathroom, followed by another…“Oh, my God!” she gasped, recognizing the sound of breaking glass.
Dropping the carton of ice cream on the floor, she ran to the bathroom to find that Tyler had pulled the second cosmetic shelf down. Along with it had come a large framed picture from the wall…its glass broken into hundreds of pieces and Tyler standing in the middle of the mess, his arms and hands bleeding.
Without a thought that she, herself, could get cut, Fallon ran straight to the boy, picked him up and got him out of the bathroom. But halfway down the hall he started fighting her, kicking and screaming.
“Leave me alone!” he wailed, balling his bloody little fists and thrashing out at her. “Put me down.”
“Hold still.” she said, trying to have a look at the gashes on his arms without letting go of him. Which was an impossible task because Tyler was in a fit of rage, fighting her with everything he had in him. “Hold still, Tyler. I need to see how badly you’re cut.”
“Don’t you dare!” he screamed, still fighting against her. “Just put me down or I’ll…”
He didn’t finish his threat but he didn’t have to. Fallon knew exactly what he wanted to do, and would do the instant she let him go. So she held on even tighter, grabbed her keys from the table next to the front door, and ran as hard and as fast as she could to her car, with Tyler still pounding and kicking. Once there, she managed to get the back door open and literally had to toss him inside and get the door shut in the same swift movement. Then she locked the car with the remote control, ran to the driver’s side, and simply watched Tyler for a moment. He was crying, and kicking the back of the seat. But the rage was gone, and replacing it was fear and sadness. He was now just a sad, scared little boy. Problem was, when she got in, that could change.
And it did. The instant she was behind the wheel Tyler started his tirade again, kicking the back of the seat, screaming, crying. “Tyler,” she said, keeping her voice perfectly calm, “you’re going to be fine. I’m a nurse, and I’m going to take you to the hospital to have your cuts taken care of.” She knew that the better way would have been to stop the bleeding, remove glass fragments, bandage the wounds before moving