The C.A.M.P. Guide to Sex and the Single Gay. Victor J. Banis

the street. Carry something you can drop on the sidewalk now and then, just to make yourself stoop over and pick it up. It helps that advancing waistline more than you think, and there are other benefits as well.

      You may not know it, but exercising will make you less tired. You see, certain acids have a tendency to build up in the body, particularly at the joints, and as these acids are passed into the bloodstream, they create that “tired” feeling often attributed to not taking Geritol. By exercising, you burn up these acids. For that reason, one airline executive recommends the above exercise for long flights—that is, dropping a pencil or something so you have to bend down for it. Of course, that’s only recommended for flights in a plane. It could be risky on a broomstick.

      Everyone hates to exercise, I know. But if you happen to live with someone, you’ll find an exercise program in which everyone participates easier to keep up than one you do alone. Anything you do alone is really not as much fun as having a partner, don’t you agree? Of course you do, that’s why you’re reading this.

      Diets, naturally, are another source of pain and discomfort, but another necessary evil. Serious overweight or underweight problems, as I said before, should be handled by a professional. But if your problem is only an advancing tummy or the like, a few sensible habits will make the difference between being lovely or ludicrous.

      If you have to go to that beer bar every night, then for goodness sake make sure you account for the calorie consumption by cutting down on the sweets and stuff you normally have with dinner. And you can also investigate the caloric count in such things as vodka and tonic (180 calories) versus Scotch and soda (90 calories), or martinis (170 calories) versus Manhattans (235 calories). Get the picture? A Rob Roy will only cost you 110 of those nasty things, but a zombie, weighing in at 520, isn’t worth it.

      Just to give you a few ideas, I prepared a little list to indicate some of the danger areas:

      BEVERAGES:

      black coffee...NONE!

      w/cream...25

      cream & sugar...55

      tea (naked)...NONE!

      milk...165

      ale...100

      beer...100

      sweet cocktails...250

      dry cocktails...90

      highballs...150

      liqueurs...80 to 90

      whisky (a jigger)...110 to 150

      sweet wine (1 glass)...130

      dry wine (1 glass)...95

      BREAD:

      white...65 (one slice)

      rye...70

      biscuit...100

      English muffin...130

      Danish pastries...120

      Saltine (double)...40

      DESERTS:

      chocolate layer cake...400

      pound cake...115

      cookies...110 to 125 each

      Now, good habits, remember, are a prerequisite, so start now and don’t flinch. Take that extra few minutes every time you go out or before you settle down for an evening of television, to work on your grooming. You’ll thank me, and yourself, I guarantee. And even if you do wind up spending the entire evening alone, you’ll feel a whole lot better sending and smelling your nice, fresh, clean self into that trundle bed.