always hoped and prayed that, wherever her son was, he’d been adopted by good people. But somehow, at the same time, she’d imagined that when she finally found him she’d be rescuing him from a family that hadn’t given him nearly as much love as he deserved.
Now, however, she’d come face-to-face with reality. And the reality was that Robbie was a happy, secure child—whom Hank loved very much.
It was almost enough to start her wondering if she was making a mistake. If she should back away and content herself with being far less a part of his life than she wanted to be.
But how could she?
She’d felt him growing inside her, and had given birth to him. Held him when he was barely a minute old. Nursed him. And she’d never stopped loving him with all her heart.
He was part of her. Part of Carlos. How could she back away from that?
The sound of a phone ringing interrupted her thoughts, and a second later Robbie trotted over to her with a painted wooden puzzle. They’d just spread all the pieces right side up on the floor, when Audrey hurried into the room.
“That was Mark,” she told Hank. “He and Valerie just got to the hospital.”
“Do you want me to call about a flight?” Hank asked her. “Get you on the earliest one I can?”
“Oh, yes, please. I’m so excited I can hardly think straight, let alone deal with the airlines.”
“Oh, and Hank,” she added as he was heading off, “don’t book a return one that comes in too late.
“My daughter’s having her first baby,” she explained to Natalie as Hank disappeared. “They live in Idaho, so I’m not likely to arrive before she delivers.
“But we decided it made more sense to have most of my time there afterward, with her and the baby, than sit around just waiting, beforehand.
“You know how it is with firstborns. Well, of course you do—you’re a doctor. They can be weeks late.”
“Yes, they certainly can.”
She glanced at her firstborn. Her only born. He’d been a mere eight days late, but she’d thought she’d never go into labor.
“Oh, now I’m wondering if I should have said I’d stay longer than two weeks and gone earlier,” Audrey murmured. “Then I could be in the delivery room with her. But I just didn’t want to take too much time away from Robbie.”
“Who’ll be looking after him while you’re away?”
For a fleeting second, the hope that they might have no one lined up and that she could do it flitted through her mind.
But she told herself they’d have something arranged, even before Audrey said, “One of my friends. She’s a widow, too, so she can move in on a moment’s notice.”
Audrey turned toward Robbie, saying, “You’re going to be good as gold for Mrs. Harmand, aren’t you.”
He nodded.
“And will you miss me?”
“Uh-huh.”
“How much?”
Grinning, he stretched his arms apart as widely as they’d go.
“Well, good, because I’m going to miss you, too. A whole bunch. But I’ll be back soon.”
Focusing on Natalie again, she said, “Will you be all right here until Hank’s off the phone? I’m basically packed, but I’ve got some last-minute things to gather up.”
“Sure, we’ll be fine. We’re just getting started on the puzzle. Right, Robbie?”
“Uh-huh.” He turned his attention back to it as Audrey hurried from the room.
Natalie sat on the floor beside him, very aware this was her first time alone with him in over three years.
Her throat tight with emotion, she desperately wanted to wrap her arms around him and hug him half to death. She didn’t make a move, though.
She knew better than to try to force herself on a child—even if he was her own—so she merely watched him, her eyes drinking in the way his dark hair curled onto his neck, the smoothness of his skin, the perfection of his little hands hovering over the pieces of the puzzle.
The last time she’d seen him…
But there was no sense thinking about how many milestones she’d missed in his life. The past was past, and the important thing was that she’d finally found him. Now all she had left to do was work things out with Hank.
All? she silently repeated. What was she trying to do? Fool herself into believing that arriving at an agreement with him would be easy?
There was no point in that, especially not when something he’d said earlier was still lingering in her memory.
“Every day Robbie spends with you will be a day he isn’t spending with me,” he’d pointed out. “And I’m not happy about that.”
Of course, she could say the same thing. So arriving at a plan they could both live with was going to be tough.
“There,” Robbie said.
Focusing on the puzzle, she saw he’d put a couple of the pieces together.
“Good,” she said.
As she was reaching for the one that would fit next to them, Hank reappeared.
“I have Audrey on a flight that leaves in two hours,” he told her. “So I’m afraid we’ll have to cut this short. If the traffic around Newark’s bad, we could be tight for time.
“Let’s get some shoes on you,” he added to Robbie. “You can’t walk around an airport in just socks.”
Without even thinking before speaking, she said, “If it would be easier to leave him here, I’d be glad to stay with him.”
“No,” Hank said so sharply that Robbie’s gaze darted to him.
“I mean…thanks,” he added more gently. “But I like taking him places. Especially ones we don’t often go to.”
She nodded, telling herself not to let his initial reaction bother her. But it was hard to do when he so obviously didn’t trust her. He was afraid that if he left Robbie with her, he’d come back to discover they’d vanished.
“Crazy thinking,” she whispered under her breath.
Even if kidnapping was something she’d consider, which she wouldn’t, the man was a police detective. If she tried to make a run for it with Robbie, Hank would have their descriptions all over the country in no time flat.
Yet he figured she might try. And that made her wonder if he actually intended to ever let her be alone with her son.
Maybe he was only putting on an act, only pretending he’d be willing to agree to some sort of compromise. Maybe, right this minute, his lawyer was working on a way to simply get her out of the picture.
If that was it, if Hank Ballantyne was playing her for a fool, the sooner she talked to her lawyer again the better.
But how could she possibly know whether that was it or not?
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