she lifted her arms ‘—in the gorgeous garden of the castle, with the gorgeous trees and colours around us. You have to make more of an effort.’
He narrowed his eyes. ‘Are you always this...optimistic?’
Her lips twitched at the disgust in his tone. ‘The quickest answer to that is yes.’
‘Even though they’re taking fake photographs to celebrate our fake engagement?’
‘It may not be the traditional way people choose to marry, but it isn’t fake.’ Nalini fought to keep her voice light, though he was dampening her enjoyment. ‘In fact, this is probably as real as it’s ever going to be for us.’
‘That doesn’t sound optimistic.’
‘Sometimes realism slips in before I get to shine it with positivity.’ But she sighed, and felt her mood turn to match his. ‘Look, the simplest way for us to get through this is to make it look genuine. No one would question our commitment if they look at the pictures and any onlookers will feel as though they’ve seen something worth looking at.’
She paused when they reached the path, and decided to tell him what she really thought. ‘That means you probably shouldn’t touch me like I’m some wounded animal you’d like to save but are disgusted by because you found it on the street.’
His lips curved. ‘That’s quite the vivid image.’
‘Yes, well.’ She sniffed. ‘I’ve always had a talent with words.’
‘So I’m beginning to see.’ He stared at her for a beat longer than she was comfortable with, and then nodded. ‘Fine. I’ll stop complaining.’ He pulled at the neck of the uniform he looked so dashing in with the words, ‘And I’ll pretend to be in love with you. Or, at the bare minimum, in lust.’
‘You just have to look as though you’re interested in me,’ she said quickly, not wanting to dwell on the way her heart skipped at the thought of either of those options. ‘So stop frowning, for heaven’s sake, and focus on the fact that it is a beautiful day. And that your kingdom will probably respond positively to your efforts.’
She hurried after the photographer then, afraid his teasing would turn into something else. She wasn’t worried that that something else would be physical. She had no interest in exploring that, no matter how attractive she found him. Or how he felt about her, she thought, remembering the heat in his eyes when he’d seen her in the blush knee-length dress she’d chosen for the engagement photos.
No, she was more worried about how he got her to reveal things about herself that she didn’t want anyone to know. Like the fact that she’d never told anyone that she felt like a problem child. Not even Xavier or Alika. Though she was sure that if she told them they wouldn’t be surprised.
They all knew about that day—as her mother liked to call it—which had really been the only time in Nalini’s life that she’d outright disobeyed her parents. But the consequences had been so far-reaching that it had tainted the years since. For her family and herself.
It was the reason she was on Kirtida, marrying a man she didn’t know for the sake of her kingdom. It was the reason she was trying so damn hard to make things work between them. She wanted to prove to herself—to her family—that it hadn’t been a mistake. That her hopes of changing their perspective of her, of her actions, would pan out. That she wasn’t just giving them another reason to think that she was reckless.
Not for the first time, Nalini thought of how much easier her life would have been if she’d been more like Alika. Willing to accept and obey. But she also knew that easy meant different things to different people. Yes, it meant less conflict and more safety. She knew because she had been more like Alika since that day. But it had also kept her living in a little box, so confined, so afraid that she’d felt as if the real her—the excited, happy her—had been whittled away slowly until she was only that way with her siblings.
And not because she wanted to be. Because she thought they needed it.
Even though it hadn’t been there before that afternoon, Nalini twisted the engagement ring on her finger as though the nervous habit had accompanied her all her life. She’d been surprised when Zacchaeus had offered it to her, but he’d done it so unceremoniously that she hadn’t had the chance to feel emotional about it.
Not that she would have felt emotional, she told herself. She didn’t expect love or romance any more—wishing for such things was foolish. She’d learnt her lesson with Josh, hadn’t she? Besides, she only had to look at her siblings to confirm it. Sure, Xavier’s life was a lot happier now that he’d found love with his one-time best friend, but he’d gone through plenty of heartache before he’d got there.
No, Nalini wasn’t interested in love or romance any more. What she was interested in was making sure her family knew that she’d changed. She also wanted autonomy in her life, and love wasn’t going to give her that. An arranged marriage, on the other hand...
She stopped when she found the photographer, and watched as he squinted against the late afternoon sun. The man had insisted that they take the outdoor photos then, though now Nalini wasn’t entirely sure he was confident in that decision. He cursed as he worked, taking practice shots of the stream that led down to a large pond.
‘Is it just me, or does it feel like we’re interrupting something?’ Zacchaeus’s voice sounded in her ear just as it had the day before, on the boat. Now, though, Nalini didn’t have the sea breeze to blame for the shiver that went up her spine.
But you’re not interested in acting on it, a voice in her head told her in a mocking tone that she didn’t appreciate.
‘Artists,’ she replied. ‘Temperamental creatures.’
‘That’s a broad statement.’
‘And not one I thought you’d call me on,’ she said with a smile. ‘I don’t think all artists are temperamental. I do think this one is, which is why we’d better get into that frame before it’s night and we have to do this again tomorrow.’
‘You’re right,’ Zacchaeus said and took her hand, dragging her to the stream. ‘Are we okay here, Stefan?’
‘Yes, sir, that’s perfect,’ Stefan answered, but took at least a dozen more shots before getting to them. ‘Could you please move closer together?’
‘I told you,’ Nalini murmured and took a step forward to close the distance between her and Zacchaeus. Her heart immediately thumped louder, harder, in her chest and she stopped before she touched him.
‘Why does it feel like you’re the one treating me like a disgusting wounded animal now?’ he asked, and placed a hand at the bottom of her spine. With little effort he pressed her against him, and her heart rocketed—out of her chest and, she was pretty sure, out of her body.
It hadn’t been like this before. Their official photos had been close, yes, but there she’d been at his side. There she’d held his hand, which wasn’t as bad as she’d thought it would be. But being face to face like this, their bodies aligned...
It made that attraction a lot harder to ignore. Especially since her mind chose to pay attention to the hard muscles of his body right at that moment.
‘Your Royal Highness, could you move closer?’ Stefan called from behind his camera.
‘Yes, Your Royal Highness,’ Zacchaeus teased. ‘Move closer.’
‘I think I’m close enough,’ she answered, but pressed her body a fraction closer to his.
‘Now smile,’ Stefan called again, and now Nalini felt as though the entire thing was ridiculous.
But she had to acknowledge that it was only ridiculous because she had to focus on making sure Zacchaeus didn’t think he was making her nervous while remembering to smile and to relax her body.
‘Turn your heads to face one another,’ Stefan asked after