are subject to change, but once we have completed our schooling, many of us lose the flexibility and adaptation of everyday life to our own needs. Growing demands from work, family and leisure are becoming an ever tighter net, which permits only little adjustment - unless we act very actively and consciously in exactly this direction. People act habitually in order to make everyday life easier for themselves.
However, it is fundamentally important and healthy to question these structures from time to time and, if necessary, to rearrange them. Especially in times in which we do not feel optimally balanced, the change of everyday structures can become an effective means. First read through the proposed optimization measures and then decide which of these changes will inspire you the most right away. Of course, you do not have to stop according to one method, but can gradually enrich your everyday structures with the various methods.
The word "must" and its relatives
The word "must" puts most people under pressure. And that's not surprising either, after all, it's clearly a challenge with an almost compelling character. The word "should" also has this message. We are often asked by the outside world to say the word "must": "The documents must be ready by the evening". Or "We have to go to the wedding from XY to Munich." And often, without hesitation, we adopt exactly this message in this compulsive form, although there is only in very few cases a vital reason for it.
Much worse, however, is when we adopt this attitude and put ourselves and other people under equal pressure with our "must" demands: "I have to have this task done by tomorrow." The word "must" does not necessarily have a positive connotation and so we should simply delete it from our vocabulary. Also terms like "problem", "difficulty" or "impossible" (and many more) point us to one thing in particular: To our supposed limits. All these negatively connotated terms do not really contribute to our relaxation and accordingly we should exchange them. Part one of this method is to pay close attention in the next week to the contexts in which you use terms with negative connotations.
Ideally you should write these words down, because the second part of this method is about finding positive alternatives for these words and using them consciously in everyday life. For example, "problems" then become "challenges", the lawn "doesn't have to" be mown (which it really doesn't have to...), but "could" or "may" be mown. And so the "food problem" becomes a "change in diet" and many more opportunities open up. Our language is an expression of our thoughts and we have the possibility to perceive our thoughts more attentively by a more conscious handling of our language, to change them in this way. These changed trains of thought will have a positive effect on your mood, motivation and balance!
"No!" say
Saying "No!" is incredibly difficult for many people, but why is that so? You can probably imagine the answer: Our fears. Let's first look at why saying "no" is fundamentally important. Every time we take on a task that doesn't match our needs, we should have said "no". The fact that we nevertheless take on these tasks means that we take on ourselves. Instead of weighing up which tasks we can take on in the context of our own health in good conscience and without stress, we focus on the needs and ideas of other people. For fear of losing prestige, endangering relationships or missing professional opportunities, we limit ourselves, ignore our needs, and put ourselves in the background in our own lives.
Observe the next few weeks very closely as you make your decisions. Many decisions have become routine and can therefore no longer be recognized as decisions. For example, it has become normal that you pay for lunch with your colleague or drive to the end of town for errands for relatives. We make thousands of decisions every day and many of them have become routine, so that we can master our everyday life at all. It would be terrible if we actually had to consider whether this is the right way to go at the slightest effort. This exercise is mainly about the bigger decisions.
At best, you write down your decisions the moment you make them. At first you will only notice a few decisions, but this will become more with increased attention. Then, in a quiet minute, consider why you made the decision and whether you are actually happy with your decision making. What alternative choices would there have been and what would have contributed to your balance? The more aware you become of your choices and needs, the more often you can make healthy decisions.
Abolish multitasking
Yes, multitasking seems like the perfect way to combine as many tasks as possible. But let's be honest: How effective are you when you do four tasks at the same time? In the meantime, studies have shown that multitasking does not increase but reduces our efficiency and productivity. And the explanation is simple: to realize our full potential, we need great mental capacity and this is blocked by the division of our concentration into several tasks. I mean that I've never seen a top athlete at training who also tried a Bulletproof Coffee and planned his weekend trip. Highest efficiency and productivity require highest concentration and we achieve this through singletasking!
Where in your everyday life do you rely on multitasking? Perhaps you are not so well aware of the situations because they have become your everyday behavioural repertoire. So take a little time, a pen and paper and think in a quiet place in which everyday situations you do multitasking. We always experience relaxation when we can consciously and attentively perceive people, places, activities and circumstances. Multitasking prevents this, however. Start by setting up your everyday life in such a way that you can singletask. This may feel unfamiliar at first, but it decelerates everyday life wonderfully and gives you the opportunity to really enjoy the individual activities!
Integrating breaks into everyday life
What do you think about people who regularly meet during working hours for a chat or a coffee break? Maybe these people are the epitome of unproductivity for you. But the reality is a little different: Those who take regular breaks are more productive in the long term. The breaks allow us to maintain the natural rhythm of relaxation and activity/tension. Even the most hardworking bodybuilder in the world needs training breaks and that's how you should handle it. A proven technique is the division of working time into units:
- 55 minutes of work
- 5 minutes break
- 55 minutes of work
- 5 minutes break
- 55 minutes of work
- 30 minutes break
- 55 minutes of work
- 5 minutes break
- ...
You can see that you should take a break of at least five minutes once an hour to increase your effectiveness and conserve your resources at the same time. Once you get used to this new rhythm, you will be able to perform better and work more creatively, effectively and productively! In the small breaks you can enjoy a short stay in the fresh air, stretch yourself, take a deep breath, eat fruit or vegetables and drink a glass of tea or water. During the longer breaks you can enjoy a full meal in peace and quiet!
Re-establish priorities
Sometimes it is time to set your priorities anew, especially when your inner balance has been lost over the years. The priorities that you set back then no longer have to correspond to your current attitude to life, so do not be afraid to rearrange this area vigorously. To do this, first write down which areas of your life you particularly fill with happiness. Is it your partnership, your family, your children, your pets, your social commitment, your job, your regular travelling, sports activities, cooking with friends or something completely different? Create your personal Top 10 to be happy. Of course, it is part of life to also provide financial security, even if the current job may not contribute to everyday happiness. Then the list of priorities is not "my profession", but "financial security". Then take a look at your everyday structure:
- How many hours do you spend sleeping?
- How much time do you spend at work?
- How much free time do you have?
Write down the exact hourly distribution of an entire week. You may find that you work a lot of overtime each week (which you don't necessarily have to make happy) and