Рим Дик

Space: one hundred one story of surrealism


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shouted that he was Poseidon, and spat with two wings, forming a tsunami for all the beetles under the tree. Of course, while sleeping.

      Once, for the umpteenth time, how many more there will be, for the sake of everything ripe, cockatoos and flamingos came to his house, oh, they were handsome, they were so pink, yellow, the peacock would envy, and demanded a place for privacy from the parrot. Just think, love and all things are so birdlike, he gave them a place, in a hollow, in his own house, so elegant, green, trinkets everywhere. Flamingos and cockatoos came in and retired. Give, I think, the parrot says to himself, I’ll watch the show, the first time this has happened in his life, maybe he will learn something. And he sees the following: “Flamingos and cockatoos are sitting and smoking. Yes, not so hot, but a banana, without fire, is swallowed and put out of the mouth. A parrot flew up with a roar of a lion, scared away the birds, they immediately laid an egg, and demanded a share of their fortune. Well, what is this state, they are birds. And they coughed, took out a couple of gold coins, a ring and a necklace, gave it to a parrot. The parrot loves everything colored and glittery. In a word, only they mentioned that the parrot would not tell other animals about their game with the cockatoo. The parrot promised, of course, and five minutes after they left, he blabbed everything. And now everyone wanted to blow bananas. Yes, some, in general, you know, in addition to the backside, they did not have a mouth, but they also wanted to blow. So they blew until all the monkeys became extinct. They ate nothing but a banana, poor macaques really. And there is something that already someone, somewhere and somewhere, ate, well, it’s not here. The monkeys were proud. So they died, and were listed in the black book. Blacker was only the throat, where the bananas with the peel were doomed to disappear. The banana has become a scarcity in the world. Black markets sold fresh, but there was no way to get them. so that the parrot does not tell other animals about their game with the cockatoo. The parrot promised, of course, and five minutes after they left, he blabbed everything. And now everyone wanted to blow bananas. Yes, some, in general, you know, in addition to the backside, they did not have a mouth, but they also wanted to blow. So they blew until all the monkeys became extinct. They ate nothing but a banana, poor macaques really. And there is something that already someone, somewhere and somewhere, ate, well, it’s not here. The monkeys were proud. So they died, and were listed in the black book. Blacker was only the throat, where the bananas with the peel were doomed to disappear. The banana has become a scarcity in the world. Black markets sold fresh, but there was no way to get them. so that the parrot does not tell other animals about their game with the cockatoo. The parrot promised, of course, and five minutes after they left, he blabbed everything. And now everyone wanted to blow bananas. Yes, some, in general, you know, in addition to the backside, they did not have a mouth, but they also wanted to blow. So they blew until all the monkeys became extinct. They ate nothing but a banana, poor macaques really. And there is something that already someone, somewhere and somewhere, ate, well, it’s not here. The monkeys were proud. So they died, and were listed in the black book. Blacker was only the throat, where the bananas with the peel were doomed to disappear. The banana has become a scarcity in the world. Black markets sold fresh, but there was no way to get them. apart from the backside and had no mouth, but they also wanted to blow. So they blew until all the monkeys became extinct. They ate nothing but a banana, poor macaques really. And there is something that already someone, somewhere and somewhere, ate, well, it’s not here. The monkeys were proud. So they died, and were listed in the black book. Blacker was only the throat, where the bananas with the peel were doomed to disappear. Banana has become a scarcity in the world. Black markets sold fresh, but there was no way to get them. apart from the backside and had no mouth, but they also wanted to blow. So they blew until all the monkeys became extinct. They ate nothing but a banana, poor macaques really. And there is something that already someone, somewhere and somewhere, ate, well, it’s not here. The monkeys were proud. So they died, and were listed in the black book. Blacker was only the throat, where the bananas with the peel were doomed to disappear. The banana has become a scarcity in the world. Black markets sold fresh, but there was no way to get them.

      Even in those jungles there lived a hippopotamus, only the island of Madagascar was fatter than it. Well, he was and was, what’s wrong with that, isn’t it. And he dived into the swamp, and flew out of the black hole in space, and again flew into the black hole, and, with his mouth open, jumped back through the swamp. He was an astronomer, he studied the stars around the earth. He saw, of course, not very well, because he wore glasses. He stuck them right into his eye like lenses. And who taught him to wear them, no one, he himself learned. Since then, he saw many stars, but his paws were not the same, and so be the case, he got himself lapwings, small birds that recorded the cosmic world according to them. Hippo said:

      – Round, white!

      Lapwing spelled round white. Put a white dot.

      – Black everywhere! – jumping out of the swamp, the beast whispered, and flew away again.

      Chibis wrote:

      – White, everywhere black around. Round. You are. Dot.

      He did so many dots that all the whites were white, all the round ones were round, and they had no names. But then, looking at night, and comparing the stars on the sheet with the stars in the sky, the hippo nodded that the lapwing wrote down correctly to every point.

      – White and round.

      Crocodiles lived in the desert. They are doctors, after all, they helped any dying person. When patients came to him with a complaint, the crocodile nodded importantly and said that there was always a way out. Swallowed them. And the patients didn’t get sick anymore.

      Even real centaurs flew in the sky, a mixture of not a person, but a lion, a giraffe and a rooster. They were very beautiful too. The tail of a lion, the mane of a lion, the neck of a giraffe and the body of a rooster, and the beak. He could fly, of course, so-so, but he crowed beautifully. When he did this, all the animals immediately fell unconscious. It was from fear, or from what else, who knows, after that they did not wake up to find out what a wonderful voice that beast possessed. Therefore, selling earplugs, the jerboa has become a real oligarch of the animal world, and the richest animal in the entire planet. Of course, you should not believe these tales, but that’s the way it is. For them, the world ended where they lived.

      At seven o’clock in the afternoon, when the space leeches that fed on thunderstorms crawled out of the sky, the desert was already dry, like the skin of an old grandmother of a rattlesnake. Rattlesnakes spit sand, and their eyes saw pixels. Space leeches loved to hurt, and instead of blood they ate clouds. They fed on lightning and became more dangerous themselves, let’s just say, save our souls, save our asses, monsters that killed whales. Whales are harmless, why do this, so we didn’t understand it either. But the leeches were poisoned later. Pegasi knew their stuff, they burped magic, and since there was no grass in the sky, they ate leeches instead of everything. The more they ate them, the faster and faster they became. Soon, leeches are completely gone, they say, occasionally you can hear how Pegasus neighs, sweeping the farm yard where they breed them, and eat only on especially difficult days. Leeches, they like piranhas, they jump out of their enclosures, pegasuses immediately eat them. Then the brain of them, of space creatures, let’s say, developed by watching their relatives die. They got smarter. One of the leeches, there is such a myth, walks on the head of a mighty Pegasus, eats lightning, and shares them with him. It’s up to you to believe it or not, but sometimes I’m afraid to look at the sky, it’s very dangerous, and I haven’t seen clouds for a long time, and I haven’t seen thunderstorms since the creation of spacecraft. There are only two of them, one for a jaguar, the other for a person. A jaguar is watching on his Netflix from the future, and a man is trying to fly to the moon to leave a trail. Only all the time somewhere the fuel disappears. And this, it turns out, the raccoon drinks all the fuel. Only he became invisible, because he mutated, because the person still could not find him. in space creatures, say, developed by watching their relatives die. They got smarter. One of the leeches, there is such a myth, walks on the head of a mighty Pegasus, eats lightning, and shares them with him. It’s up to you to believe it or not, but