may now be acceptable, remember that it can sometimes lead to ambiguity. At the other extreme is the multiple that: He pointed out that that that in the sentence was superfluous. What can you do about that?
Harmony in the Sentence
What if Shakespeare had written in Hamlet: To be, or not being – that is the question? Well, of course he didn’t, and wouldn’t. From time to time scholars have pointed out examples of the Bard’s bad grammar but sentences with faulty harmony in his plays would be hard to find.
Perhaps the most important principle in the construction of sentences is what is called harmony – or concord, consistency or parallelism – meaning that all the units in a sentence must agree and harmonise with each other. We can spot most inharmonious constructions, because they usually jar:
February is usually a succession of rain, hail and snowing.
That sentence mixes two nouns and a participle, and it screams out at you, doesn’t it? An harmonious construction would prefer to group three nouns:
February is usually a succession of rain, hail and snow.
Alternatively, we could use a trio of participles to achieve harmony:
In February, it is usually either raining, hailing or snowing.
Phrases in a sentence should match, too. In this example the second phrase is out of harmony with the first:
Bad grammar is like having bad breath – even your best friends won’t tell you.
There are two easy ways to remove the discord here. One is to match the phrase bad grammar with a similar adjective/noun phrase; the other is to add a parallel participle to bad grammar to match having bad breath:
Bad grammar is like bad breath – even your best friends won’t tell you.
Using bad grammar is like having bad breath – even your best friends won’t tell you.
Misplaced conjunctions (joiners) are another source of discord in sentences. Perhaps the two most common offenders are either/or and not only/but also:
| CONFUSING | They had to agree either to visit the museum or the gallery. |
| The house was not only affected with woodworm but also by years of neglect. | |
| CORRECT | They had to agree to visit either the museum or the gallery. |
| The house was affected not only by woodworm but also by years of neglect. |
Another form of discord is the shift from active to passive voice in a sentence, or vice versa:
My father painted those pictures, which he left to me.
That sentence switches from active (My father painted those pictures) to passive voice (which he left to me). To achieve harmony, keep to the same voice:
| ACTIVE | My father painted those pictures, and left them to me. |
| PASSIVE | Those pictures were painted by my father, which he left to me. |
Clearly, the sentence that uses the active voice is the easier to read. A similar sort of discord is created when a sentence mixes personal and impersonal points of view:
The student should always exercise care and judgement because you will never succeed with slipshod thinking.
One should always exercise care and judgement because you will never succeed with slipshod thinking.
In the first example, consistency in person can be achieved by replacing you with he or she; in the second, the writer should either stick to the generic pronoun one throughout the sentence, or change the opening One to You.
Although perhaps not causing discord, faulty word order or misplaced modifiers in sentences can create confusion and chaos in otherwise simple sentences:
I saw you in my underwear!
could mean either I saw you when I was wearing only my underwear or, more ominously, I saw you, wearing my underwear! Such a sentence could create not only confusion, but a most alarming scene. The misplaced modifier has been responsible for some hilariously ambiguous sentences:
Last night Helen went to see Elton John in a new dress.
We have a parrot in a cage that talks.
We can fit you in a new swimsuit that flatters – right over the phone!
You see very few signposts rambling around Wales.
The bomb was discovered by a security man in a plastic bag.
Send us your ideas on growing dwarf roses on a postcard.
However, of all the factors that can result in inharmonious sentences, the most prevalent is probably disagreement between the verb with its subject. In other words, a singular subject requires the singular form of a verb, and a plural subject requires the plural form of a verb: this book, these books; that book, those books; she sings, they sing. The following sentences ignore this:
We was furious at the umpire’s crazy decision.
Fifteen paintings was sold at auction last week.
They should, of course, read:
We were furious at the umpire’s crazy decision.
Fifteen paintings were sold at auction last week.
But look what happens when we ‘collectivise’ the subjects:
The team was furious at the umpire’s crazy decision.
A collection of paintings was sold at auction last week.
Because we’ve gathered the players together into a team, and combined the paintings into a collection – that is, into single groups – we’re back to using singular verbs. The important thing is to keep subjects and verbs in agreement in a sentence. While most of us would regard these examples as obviously faulty, many of us might stumble when confronted by nouns and noun phrases that can take either singular or plural forms. Nouns such as team, family and committee can be treated as singular or plural depending upon the context in which they are used. This is discussed at some length in Singular and Plural Nouns, page 69, but meanwhile here is an example of how carelessness with verb and subject agreement can cause bewilderment and ambiguity.
The noun, in this case, is a name: the Human Fertilisation and Embryology Authority. What follows is from an article in The Times (22/11/96 – ‘Widow Barred From Taking Husband’s Sperm Abroad’) which is an extraordinary cocktail of inconsistencies:
She was told by the Human Fertilisation and Embryology Authority that they would review her case . . . Diane Blood is outraged at the way the Authority has behaved . . The Authority have not even given any of their reasons . . the Authority said it would review the issue . . and it would not use its discretionary powers . . but said they wanted to ‘leave no stone unturned’ in their review and would give its reasons . . .
That passage is a sobering lesson on the importance of, first, deciding whether your noun is singular or plural, and then sticking with the decision!
SENTENCES – You see very few signposts wandering