feared the worst, unsure now of the precise location. He never brought up that day with Dai Jai for to do so would be bad luck, but he thought of it sometimes at the ancestral altar, when he thanked the ancestors and offered roasted meat and oranges.
One afternoon during what was to be their last family trip in 1958, the beach was empty at siesta time, but Dai Jai did not wish to return to the villa. He wanted to swim. Over the course of summers at Cap St. Jacques, Dai Jai had learned how to swim from the local boys, and he spent every possible moment in the water. Cecilia was stretched out on a lounge chair beneath an umbrella, complaining of the heat. There were no beach boys to run and bring cold drinks, and the air burned the inside of Percival’s nostrils. He, too, wanted to escape the sun and lie beneath a fan, but since Cecilia wished to return to the villa, he declared that the boy should swim. Dai Jai bragged to his father that he could swim out to the open ocean, to where the waves no longer broke. He ran in and plunged headlong into the surf. Dai Jai darted beneath the waves as they crested. Cecilia asked Percival to call their son back, but Percival retreated beneath an umbrella and said nothing, pleased that Dai Jai had taken his father’s permission as enough.
The heat caused time to stretch, and Cecilia closed her eyes. Percival half-watched Dai Jai for a while, expecting that he would soon turn back towards shore. The boy paused, waved, and continued to go out. Big for his eight years of age, he was becoming a good swimmer. After some time, Percival remarked, “He is swimming very fast, isn’t he?”
Cecilia sat up and stared. They could see only Dai Jai’s back bobbing up occasionally. Then Cecilia stood, shouted at their son, but already he was too far to hear. Between the peaks of the waves he disappeared. His arms were little punctuation marks in the ocean.
As they watched, Dai Jai shrank into the ocean. “He is being swept out!” she said. Although Percival’s reflex was to disagree, it was true. The boy was going out faster than he could possibly be swimming. A large wave broke over him and he vanished in a long expanse of water. Cecilia yelled, “Go out after him!”
Percival stood, and then stopped, frozen. “I can’t swim.” Neither of them could.
“You are his father. Go!”
There was no doubt. The boy was being swallowed by the ocean. Percival ran out into the water, and was surprised at the force that tugged and buffeted him. He waded ahead. “Son! Come back, you’re being pulled out!” His voice was lost in the crashing surf. Percival swung his hands high above him like flags, struggled forward into water that surged up to his neck. “Turn around! Swim back!” He threw the words uselessly into the ocean. Soon he was unable to see more than a few feet around him. A wave smashed over his head. Salty brine filled his mouth, stung his eyes. Percival looked into the moving walls of water, trying to see through them where Dai Jai had gone. He was caught by another wave, a larger one, that pushed him off his feet. He lost all direction as the wave roiled over him and carried him towards shore. He staggered up onto shore, coughing, his throat prickling with salt. Again, he ran into the surf, called, waved, but was unable to see the boy. Behind him, Cecilia yelled, “Go get your son, you useless man!”
Vietnamese children learned to swim as soon as they learned to walk, in the creeks, lagoons, and in the sea, but Percival had grown up in Shantou. During all these trips to Cap St. Jacques, he had never been into water deeper than his knees. He liked the look and smell of the ocean, but had never been interested in swimming. Now he flailed desperately into the water again, could not see Dai Jai. A crest lifted him up, his feet off the sand. He made the wild motions with his arms and legs that seemed to be what swimmers did, and felt his head submerged once more, a fist of water rammed down his throat. A swell gathered him, tumbled him over in white and blue, until he felt his knees scrape on the sand near the shore. On his hands and knees, sputtering, Percival vomited sea water.
Cecilia did not look at him. Her eyes were fixed on the horizon. “There he is! Look!”
Percival staggered a little way up the beach, searched in the direction of her pointed finger. At first, he saw only breaking waves and the line of the horizon.
“Where?”
Then he saw the black dot of his son’s head appear. He was treading water. He had been pulled beyond where the waves were breaking, far enough that if they had not seen him swim out, they would never have known he was there. The boy began to swim towards them. He must have just realized how far he had been taken by the sea.
“He’s fine, he’s coming back,” said Percival, his spirits surging like the water. They stood motionless in the sun. Percival stared at the horizon as the salt water dried to a fine itchy powder on his skin. Dai Jai swam towards the shore, but though his arms churned desperately in a small commotion, the boy continued to grow smaller.
Cecilia said, “He’s being dragged farther out. The water is taking him away.”
“He has his good luck charm,” said Percival, a near whisper.
Cecilia stared at her husband, her fury beyond words.
Then Dai Jai vanished for a long few seconds. He appeared again, struggling now to stay afloat it seemed, his movements tired. Percival wished he had told the boy not to swim, that he had agreed with his wife that it was time for a siesta. He said, “I’ll get a boat!” and clambered up the sandy incline. He looked up and down the deserted beach. It was midday, and the boats had already been pulled up high. He tried to shift one, but it was too heavy for him to budge. He cursed his soft city muscles. The sand shimmered, indifferent. Percival ran from boat to boat, hoped to find a fisherman taking a siesta. Finally, he found a man mending nets in the shade of a palm.
Percival’s Vietnamese was worse when he was under pressure, and now he mingled vanishing words with panicked gestures. After he had managed to make himself understood, the fisherman looked at the horizon, squinted at the waves, “Swimming? Now, with the undertow? No one swims at this hour.” He shook his head. “You Chinese city people.” He rose slowly and chucked the nets into his boat.
The small outboard soon buzzed them out to where the water was quiet but heaved with deep, forceful swells. The fisherman cut the engine, and they sat on the wet thwart, bobbed up and down, peering into the shifting strokes of light on water. There was only the empty slap on the hull, and the boat itself creaking mournfully.
“He was out here,” said Percival. “I saw him here last.”
“The current is strong,” said the fisherman uncomfortably. “Sometimes it sweeps north. He could have been taken up that way.” He pulled the starter cord, and the engine coughed to life. They headed north until they came to a long, rocky arm that extended from the land into the ocean. The fisherman said he dared not go close. Percival watched the waves smash against the rocks and did not ask whether swimmers were sometimes pulled into them. They turned south and searched back and forth several times. After an eternity, the fisherman said that they must turn back. He was almost out of fuel. They returned, and pulled the boat up the beach. Silently, Percival pleaded with the ancestors’ spirits. Surely they did not want Dai Jai to die in this foreign land.
The fisherman looked away. He commented upon the price of petrol. Dazed, Percival gave him a hundred-piastre note, far too much, and regretted doing so once he saw that the money seemed to make the fisherman so happy. The smile gave Percival a pain in his chest. The man ambled up the beach with his jerry can.
Cecilia ran up, touched Percival’s arm. “Where is he? Where is our son?”
“I don’t know,” said Percival, close to tears. He imagined his son limp and motionless, drifting beneath the surface of the sea, eyes fixed open. “He disappeared in the water, but don’t worry,” said Percival, forcing out the words, as if by saying them it would make the image of Dai Jai’s drowned body vanish. “He will be fine. The ancestral spirits will save him.”
“Why didn’t you find him?” Tears welled up in her eyes.
“They will protect him. And the sea goddess …”
Cecilia struck Percival with both fists, and then buried her face in them. She wept until the fisherman came back and