and she went with him to the nurse’s desk where he signed some papers. As she kept pace with him, worry ate at her. Even though Cade seemed self-assured and capable of taking care of the baby, she felt anxious. Holding Jenny close, Rachel followed Cade out the sliding doors and into the night. It was snowing heavily now, the sounds around them muted. No one was up and about this early on Christmas morning.
Cade led Rachel to the cruiser and placed his hand on her elbow to help her climb in. For a second time, he felt as if an angel had dropped out of the night to help him with the infant. But she would just be Jenny’s nanny—nothing else. With that thought, he shut the door and walked around the cruiser. Despite the shock of Lily’s death and his sudden fatherhood, some of the emptiness deep inside him diminished. Why? He was too exhausted to consider answers right now.
Cade climbed into the vehicle. After going through the many radio calls, he then drove them out of the slushy parking lot and headed out toward the main area of Jackson Hole. Beneath the streetlights, Cade saw Rachel’s profile go from dark to light and back. There was an incredible vulnerability to her. And her eyes haunted him. Cade could swear he saw fear in their recesses. Fear of him? More than likely, she was still in shock. Anyone witnessing such an accident would have a hell of a reaction. He’d seen so many he’d grown a bit immune over the years. In his line of work he couldn’t afford to be emotionally over-wrought. He had to think through his feelings and do the right thing at the right time. Yes, law-enforcement people had to have that edge.
“Where are you moving from?” Cade asked as he turned onto the empty main street.
Instantly, Rachel’s gut tightened. Trying to keep her face unreadable, she stuck with her cover story. “New York City.”
“This is quite a departure from city life,” Cade murmured. He slowed for a stop light. The snow flakes continued to fall in lazy, twirling motions. At least this wasn’t a blizzard coming through, and for that he was grateful.
“Uh, yes it is.”
“What drew you here?”
Rachel cringed inwardly. Of course a deputy would ask a lot of questions. The FBI witness protection program had drilled her new life and past history into her until she could recite it in her sleep. “I felt a need to get out of the city. I wanted to explore the west. It’s called to me for a long time. The family I’d worked for moved back to Italy. It seemed like fate that I make good on my dream.” She managed a smile. “Besides, I love animals and I’ve never seen a moose. I thought this would be a good place to see them.” None of that was a lie, thank goodness. For whatever reason, Rachel hated lying to Cade. He seemed so steady, reliable and honest that her conscience raged at her.
“You moved here because you hadn’t seen a moose?”
Disbelief was evident in his low voice as well as shadowed in his eyes. Rachel shrugged. “I was getting tired of the big city. I yearned for those wideopen spaces. Cowboys have always intrigued me. Call it a sudden, illogical move.” Yeah, right. Dirk Payson had broken out of prison and was hunting her. She could say nothing. And Cade would have been the ideal person to confide in. He might have gotten information on Payson through the law-enforcement sharing policies. He might have a photocopy of Dirk’s face on his desk.
“Are you given to spontaneity?” he wondered, worrying that Rachel might be gone in a few months and he’d have to look for another nanny for Jenny. Cade could not stay home and take care of the infant. He had a job and crazy hours, as well. He liked Rachel and she appeared reliable and calm. Just the type of person he’d envisioned to help care for Jenny.
“Oh, not often. The only reason I did it was because my job had ended.”
“Phew,” he said, “I was worried that you’d up and take off in a couple of months.”
“No,” Rachel said. “I won’t leave you or Jenny in the lurch.”
“That’s good to hear,” Cade said, relieved. “A deputy sheriff’s hours are always changing. We have three shifts in a twenty-four-hour period. I don’t want to think of Jenny left alone for eight hours.”
“She won’t ever be left alone,” Rachel promised him. Looking down at the baby girl sleeping soundly in her arms, Rachel silently vowed never to abandon her.
“I’ve got so many logistical problems running around in my head right now,” Cade said, pointing at his brow. “Your cabin is about two hundred feet away from my home. I figure you could stay at my house the nights I have the graveyard shift.”
“That would be fine. Or I could bring Jenny over to the cabin to stay with me.”
“I’d like everything for the baby in one place. You’re going to be busy enough without carting stuff back and forth.”
“It’s settled, then,” she said.
Cade’s mouth quirked. Her sable hair was shoulder-length and thick. It framed her face and brought out the assets of her eyes and lips. There was nothing to dislike about her. And for whatever crazy reason, he liked her—personally. “Your full name is Rachel Carson. Right?”
“Yes.” Rachel didn’t ask why he asked. She knew. If she were in Cade’s shoes, she’d be doing a background check. He’d find her new life and information. All she had to do was remember it precisely because this was a man who missed nothing. And yet, in an odd way, Rachel felt safer with him than she ever had since Dirk had abused her. She sensed that Cade was the kind of man who would protect his woman and his child at any cost to himself. In a way, she mused, he was like the knights of old going around the countryside protecting the weak, the old and the poor.
“Where did you get your education as a nanny?”
She told him.
“Is that a dream you’ve had? To be a nanny?”
Rachel watched as they left the Christmas-decorated town behind and climbed a long hill devoid of all traffic. “I love children. Nothing makes me happier than being around them.”
Cade smiled. “Well, you’re Providence dropping into my lap. I’m grateful that you’ll be Jenny’s nanny. So much has happened so fast.”
Rachel was gazing down at Jenny and her loving smile made him ache. When she looked up and met his eyes, Cade felt at a momentary loss for words. Rachel seemed like the perfect nanny for Jenny, and this belief shook him deeply. Truth was, he found himself drawn to her as a woman. He tried to shove those feelings away.
“I’m in shock over all this, too,” Rachel admitted in a soft voice. “I’m exhausted and yet, I feel like I’m still on pins and needles.”
“It’s the accident,” Cade soothed, watching the twin headlights stab into the black night. At the top of the hill the highway would straighten and level out. The snow began to ease. “You’re still in shock. I’ve got tomorrow off and the next day. Come on over when you feel like it.”
“You seem to know a lot about Jenny.”
Cade sighed. “Tom and Lily Hartmann were my best friends. Tom died six months ago, murdered by drug dealers. He was a deputy sheriff. Before he and Lily were married, they asked me to be godfather to their future children. If anything happened to them, I’d be the guardian. They had asked me because they came from adoptive families. Their adoptive parents supported their request. I said I would. I didn’t realize it would really happen.”
“Oh, dear,” Rachel murmured. Without thinking, she reached out her hand and laid it on his broad, capable shoulder. When she realized her intimate action, she quickly withdrew her hand. “I’m so sorry. You must be in shock, too. It’s awful to lose people you love.” How well she knew. She’d lost her mother and brothers. It hurt not to be able to call them, to see them or to visit the farm where she’d grown up happy and secure.
“I’m okay,” Cade said gruffly. “But my focus is on Jenny. After Tom died, I was over at their home nearly every day. I helped Lily take care of Jenny as much as I could because I know Tom would