from his office to Kylie’s desk as he said it. “Everyone is in the shower as we speak,” he said into the radio again, despite now standing directly in front of Kylie’s desk and eyeballing her.
“Rogerhhhhhhhhh,” she replied into the base mounted radio without breaking eye contact.
Kylie started clapping. “I hope Mila likes my cupcakes!” she said.
“I’m sure she will, they look great,” he said genuinely.
“Far out Shonk, this bird is so hot, even I got a woody when I met her!” Kylie said.
“You what?” he said putting his hand up to his mouth covering his laugh.
“I’m tellin’ ya, she is gorgeous. I can’t remember eyeballing anyone as stunning as that hot little biscuit, ever before, in mine life!”
“True! Well you’re certainly talking her up.”
“Yeah, but I don’t think she likes me. She’s not a snob or anything, I think I just might have scared her off a bit. You know? And I think she thought I called her a piece of cheese?”
“Why would you call her a piece of cheese?”
“Coz her name’s Mila? Like Milla Milla – where they make cheese up in The Atherton Tablelands. I was just name associating and I could have said Mila Gorilla but I didn’t know if she had a sense of humour and I didn’t want her goin’ Ape Shit on me if she didn’t!”
“Mila Gorilla, that’s funny.”
“That may be so, but she’s no gorilla, she’s more of a bird of paradise.”
“Don’t be too hard on yourself. I’m sure you will get along famously. In fact, I predict it!”
“Righto, Oh-seer of things into the futurer!!” Kylie said, wanting to believe.
At 10 am the crew all assembled in the kitchen and made themselves a cup of coffee and awaited the prompt arrival of their boss and the new girl. Kylie greeted their visitors at the office door with a happy hello and Mila commented on Kylie’s overnight transformation from a scrappy jeans and T-shirt houso to hair schmick, makeup done and frock on.
“Wow you look lovely,” she said.
“Well, you are our special guest so I dolled up for both of us,” Kylie replied.
“Thank you! Special guest. Wow!” Mila said. “That’s a big wrap!”
“Hi Kylie, you look nice today,” her boss said. “I don’t think I’ve seen you wear a skirt since your job interview!”
“Thanks, I don’t think it will be a habit though, I’m doing more training in the afternoons and spending a few hours in the front end loader and the ship loader.”
“Oh yeah, that’s great. How is all the training going?” he asked.
“Really good. I’m feeling more comfortable with everything. The guys have been really patient with me and are great teachers. Each person teaches me something different so I’m getting a broad look at every one’s techniques and meshing together what works best for me.”
“Good. That’s great news! Keep it up,” he said.
“Would you like to come into the smoko room Mila, the rest of the crew are in there and I can make you a cuppa if you like?” Kylie offered.
“Sure,” she said.
“Would you like tea, coffee or Milo, and how many sugars?” Kylie asked.
“White coffee please, no sugar.”
“What about milk? Leaded or unleaded?”
“Sorry?”
“Oh, it’s a work joke, since we sell Lead Concentrate, you know, full cream or light milk?”
“Oh I get it, Unleaded thanks,” Mila replied.
“Just the way I have it,” Kylie said as she walked into the smoko room.
“Guys, I’d like to introduce you to Mila, our newest team member based at Town Office. Mila these are the guys,” Kylie said and walked forward to stand next to her boss at the kitchen sink. She kept a close eye on Shonky’s face as Mila stepped through the doorway.
Mila looked confidently at the room full of adoring eyes and casually said, “G’day, I’m Mila! Not the cheese but!”
Kylie laughed, recalling the previous day’s conversation.
Shonky’s jaw dropped, his eyes widened and his hands went from his hips to cover his crotch. He was in awe. He walked towards Mila, his right hand outstretched to shake her hand, and the other hand turned her shoulder around and marched her out of the kitchen. “G’day Mila, I’m Hamilton, Why don’t we go somewhere quiet and you can tell me all about yourself?”
Everyone burst out laughing as Mila was led out of the kitchen. But Mila wasn’t having a bar of solo time with this Hamilton bloke. She did a 360-degree turn and wandered back into the kitchen in time to catch the unguarded reaction of the crew. Tongues were hanging out, hands were on faces, mouths were wide open. It was hilarious, especially when Mila walked in to witness it all for herself.
“Shonky!” the boss called out. “Take your hands off her and leave her alone.”
“I didn’t touch her inappropriately, I only shook her hand and led her out of the kitchen by her shoulder,” he said protesting his innocence and concealing himself and his crotch behind the safety of the doorframe.
“He’s alright, just don’t leave me alone with him,” Mila said to her boss, playing along.
“Okay, no worries.”
“No I mean, like, ever! Don’t leave me alone with that man, everhhhhhh,” she said laughing. She looked at Shonky and said, “Did you say your name was Hamilton or did someone call you Shonky?”
“BOTH!” the entire crew yelled out.
“How did you get a name like Hamilton?” she asked calmly.
“My folks are English and they said it’s something like ‘Born in a Town on a Mountain’.”
One of the guys jumped in and said, “Yeah, you’re lucky you escaped his clutches because he loves mountain women.”
Everyone burst out laughing and Shonky blushed.
“So how did you get the name Shonky?” she asked him, looking straight into his red face.
The boss answered for him, “He has a habit of being able to get things done, safely, but not in the traditional way and the name stuck at his last place of work on Groote Eylandt.”
“Yep. Shonky by name, shonky by nature,” he said still red faced. “But enough about me, let’s talk about you. What do you think about me?”
“I don’t think you can be trusted!” she replied.
“Ohhhhhhh!” the crew said in unison, as if Shonky had just been kicked in the balls in front of them.
“This is a rare occasion. Shonky rarely says his first name to anyone unless he is trying to impress them. Hey Shonky, do you have a middle name? I can’t remember if I asked you before?” Kylie asked as she filled the jug with water.
“Yes I have a middle name.”
“What is it?” Mila asked.
“It’s Roderick. Hamilton Roderick.”
“What the?” Kylie said. “Were your folks poshe noshe or something? Didn’t you grow up outside of Gympie?”
“It’s not Gympie, it’s Jim- Pie, makes it sound more refined. And Roderick means The Ruler, so maybe they wanted me to be the Ruler from the Mountain Town,” he said with a laugh.
Everyone