Although each chapter stands alone and chapters can be read and studied in any order, each chapter topic also builds on what has gone before. It is important to recognize that issues discussed in this guide, for example confidentiality, power or gender, are not abstract topics, but will be present in the dynamics of the group. Topics which are potentially more threatening, for example over-involvement with parishioners or colleagues, sexual abuse issues or loss and bereavement, need to be dealt with after a sufficient level of trust has been established in the group and with the agreement of all participants. Not all sections are suitable for group discussion; some are more appropriate for individual reflection or one-to-one discussion, and leaders and participants need to use discernment about this. Certain topics may also be unsuitable for a particular group, especially a group that is not self-selected, where people could feel under more pressure. It will therefore be safer if participants can choose topics rather than having them imposed or working through the book section by section. If a participant wishes to opt out of discussion on a particular subject this should always be respected.
‘Health’ warning
Some issues may stir up difficult feelings in the participants. Although participants should read through a topic and reflect upon the questions beforehand, the questions are primarily intended for private reflection and some would be inappropriate for use in a group setting.
Creating a safe environment
Mutual encouragement and deeper sharing depend on whether participants feel safe enough to be open and honest with one another. Learning for everyone will depend on full participation, but this should never be forced. Discussion in the group should be allowed to flow naturally, with participants sharing in their own time. There will be more potential for learning together if participants feel safe enough to acknowledge mistakes, difficulties or areas of uncertainty in their ministry, but establishing this level of trust takes time and commitment from all the group members. Safety can be undermined by irregular attendance, poor time boundaries and lack of clarity about confidentiality.
The following suggestions for safe boundaries of confidentiality should be discussed and established from the beginning and reviewed when a new member joins the group:
anything shared by others within the group should be confidential
no discussion outside the group of other participants’ style of participating
anything shared in subgroups or pairs should be confidential, unless a participant chooses to share their own material in the full group
anyone unable to attend should not expect others to report on what has been said within the group in their absence
no discussion in the group about anyone who is not present at a particular meeting.
Clear time boundaries also provide safety:
begin and end on time
allow sufficient time for in-depth discussion without the danger of overrunning
consider having a pilot session
after the pilot session make a commitment to meet on a specific number of occasions
review whether participants wish to continue at the end of the agreed number of sessions.
If a group has a pre-existing membership (e.g. a ministry team or deanery chapter), or is set up as part of a training course, then it is particularly important that everyone feels they have a choice about how they participate. Effective learning depends on finding a balance between taking risks and respecting limits. Participants should always be allowed to take responsibility for how much they share. No one should be put under pressure to speak about a specific issue. If the material is used on training courses then particular attention should be given to how issues of assessment could undermine safety within the group.
Size of group
Groups will vary in size, depending on whether there is a pre-existing membership or the group is convened specifically for the purpose of studying Tend My Flock.
study and discussion could involve as few as three or four colleagues, in which case leadership and facilitation would be shared informally between them
a group of up to eight participants could function with one leader or facilitator
a group of twelve is the maximum for effective discussion and would benefit from two leaders or facilitators
in a larger group it may sometimes help to break up into twos or threes.
Leaders or facilitators
Leaders or facilitators may be from outside the group membership. If leadership is from within the group then it may be best if it is shared among group members. Participants could volunteer to lead discussion on a particular topic that interests or is of concern to them. The leader or facilitator should:
ensure that the meeting starts and finishes on time and it may also be their responsibility to lead prayer and choose the Bible reading
keep the focus on the topic under discussion and discourage flight into abstract theories or theological disputes
ensure there is sensitive follow-up for anyone who appears to be disturbed or distressed during or as a result of the discussion
ensure that no participant’s personal experience is denied, even if it is not shared
ensure that nobody is pressurized into contributing if they choose not to speak
ensure that everyone has a chance to speak if they wish to and that no one monopolizes the discussion.
Participants
All participants should:
read and reflect upon the Introduction
undertake to read and reflect upon the sections to be discussed
make a commitment to arrive on time, not to leave early and to give priority to regular attendance at the group, even if they sometimes find the sessions difficult or there are other competing demands on their time
safeguard confidentiality when talking about a specific situation they have encountered; names and identifying details should be excluded
endeavour to speak out of their personal experience rather than taking refuge in abstract theories or displays of theological expertise
take particular responsibility for safeguarding themselves, if a topic feels potentially unsafe or threatening
offer active listening; it may sometimes be more appropriate to receive a contribution with silence or a simple acknowledgement, rather than comment, question or counter-argument
be ready to affirm other people’s individual experience and perceptions, even if they are not shared
respect different theological perspectives and points of view.
A framework of Bible reading and prayer
An appropriate and short Bible reading and prayer at the beginning and/or end of the session can help to create a safe and containing framework and ensure that discussion is rooted in shared faith. If there is vocal prayer at the end, care should be taken not to use it as a way of continuing or responding to the earlier discussion. For this reason silence and a brief closing prayer may be the safest way of bringing the session to a close.
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Aspects of Pastoral Care
The gifts he gave were that some would be apostles, some prophets, some evangelists, some pastors and teachers, to equip the saints for the work of ministry, for building up the body of Christ, until all of us come to the unity of the faith and of the knowledge of the Son of God, to maturity, to the measure of the full stature of Christ.
Ephesians