that feeling of my dear or honey try using เธอ [ter]. You’ll hear this a lot in love songs. However, it can be used for either guys or girls (though mostly to refer to women), by teachers who often refer to their students เธอ [ter] in either the second or third person.
• ชั้น รัก เธอ
chún rúk TER
I love you.
• พวก เธอ มี ปัญหาอะไร ก็ มา ปรึกษาพี่ ก็ ได้ นะ
pûak-TER mee bpun-hǎh ’à-rai gâw mah bprúek-sǎh pêe gâw dâi ná
You guys have any problem at all, just come and see me.
Sometimes to be cute or show innocence, a younger girl or maybe a girlfriend will refer to themselves in the first person as mouse: หนู [nǒo].
• หนู ขอ ใช้ อันนี้ หน่อยได้ มั้ย ฮะ
NǑO kǎw chái ’un-née nòi dâi mái há
May I please use this one?
Like many of the counties surrounding Thailand, the centrality of family in Thai society is reflected in the language. No matter how distant your relationship is with another person, it’s very normal to refer to oneself or another as big brother/sister or little brother/sister in almost any situation. พี่ [pêe] means older and น้อง [náwng] means younger. These terms will often be used at work, school or even just at a restaurant when placing an order. This concept of พี่น้อง [pêe náwng] also reinforces hierarchy in traditional Thai society in that the younger (the น้อง [náwng]) should always show some level of deference to the older (the พี่ [pêe])—no matter how much of a jackass the older may be. Depending on the context, พี่ [pêe] and น้อง [náwng] can be used in either the first, second or third person.
• พี่ี่ จะ กลับบ้านแล้วเหรอ
PÊE jà glùp bâhn láeo rǎw
You ’re gonna go home already?
• น้องๆ เก็บตังค์ นะ ครับ
NÁWNG NÁWNG gèhp dtung ná krúp
Check please!
A newer adaptation for I, you and she in Thai comes directly from English— อัย [’ai], ยู [yoo] and ชี [chee]. Since all three are just a play on English words not everyone will understand you when you use them, nor will it have the same effect as when a Thai uses them. A Thai would probably just think you don’t speak Thai very well. But either way it’s good to be aware that they’re being used more frequently these days.
• ยูู ไป ไหน เนี่ย
YOO bpai nǎi nîa
Where you goin’?
If pulling out the class card is your game give ข้า [kâh] and เอ็ง [’ehng] a try, meaning I and you. These two have the feeling of I’m above you, I’m your master, or you’re my bitch-ass little slave. The only time I ever used one of these was when I was getting off a bus in Udorn Thai in the Northeast of Thailand. As usual a swarm of decrepit individuals calling themselves Tuk-tuk drivers had surrounded the passengers trying to exit the bus. After maybe the tenth time of trying to politely refuse their service I finally ended up snapping at the next Tuk-tuk driver to touch me by yelling out, “ อย่าถูกข้า!!” [yàhk róo jung] Basically, this translates as, “Don’t you dare touch me, you little insignificant nothing!” I was lucky I didn’t get punched.
• อย่าถูก ข้า
yàh took KÂH
Don’t you dare touch me!
If you want to be a little rougher or distance yourself from the person whom you are talking about try using แก [gae]. To be even harsher refer to someone in the third person as it in Thai: มัน [mun]. Using the word it to refer to someone can start trouble. Both แก [gae] and มัน [mun] can also be used to mean you, but watch out cause these then become fightin’ words!
• แก ทำ ตัวแบบ นั้น ตลอด
GAE tam dtua bàep nún dtà-làwt
He always acts like that.
• ไอ้ มัน พูดปากหมา
’âi-MUN pôot bpàhk mǎh
That jerk talks like a f—kin’ dog!
If you really want to get nasty, nothing does the trick or gets straight to the point like using กู [goo] or มึง [mueng] to mean I or you, respectively. This can turn the simplest phrase into a f—k-you phrase immediately. However, in the case of a very close friendship Thais will refer to each other as กู [goo] and มึง [mueng], but you won’t hear it often, and you definitely won’t hear them using it with a foreigner in this manner. The few times I’ve tried to use กู [goo] and มึง [mueng] as an indication of close friendship it didn’t go so well and was strongly discouraged. That said, here are a few sentences to really, really piss a Thai off. This will lead to blows...I promise.
• กู จะ รู้ ได้ ไง วะ มึง บ้าเว้ย
GOO jà róo dâi ngai wá MUENG bâh wéri
How the f—k is my ass supposed to know. You ’re a f—kin’ retard!
• กู ไม่ เชื่อ มึง
GOO mâi chûea MUENG
I don’t f—kin’ believe you!
• แม่ มึง!
mâe MUENG
Your f—kin’ mother!
Really? Eh? No? Nahh!
Similar to how we might ask, “Ya gonna go?” instead of “Are you going to go?” in English, Thais have their own short cuts for making questions. First off, the all-encompassing question word of ไหม [mǎi] should really be pronounced like it is on the street with a high tone as มั้ย [mái], sometimes written as มั๊ย. Other times ไหม [mǎi] might be pronounced as a short มะ [má] or a short ปะ [bpà]. These renditions as opposed to the written form of ไหม [mǎi], will give your question a more personable, laidback, informal flair. See the examples below and make yourself familiar with มั้ย [mái] in particular since it will be used as the default question word throughout most of this book.
• เรา ขอ เข้าไป ด้วยได้ มั้ย
rao kǎw kâo bpai dôoi dâi MÁI
Can I come along, too?
• กินข้าวเที่ยง ด้วยกัน มั้ย
gihn-kâo tîang dôoi-gun MÁI
Ya wanna do lunch together?
• น่ารักมะ
nâh-rúk MÁ
Is she cute?
• แบบว่าอยาก