process can be compared to a bird that begins its life as a newborn baby, but ultimately grows through various stages. We are all called to transform and grow from one stage to the next. And, most likely, you will receive a signal, either internally or externally, when it is time to move out of your comfort zone or protective space. Motivational speaker Leslie Calvin “Les” Brown once said, “If you put yourself in a position where you have to stretch outside of your comfort zone, then you are forced to expand your consciousness.” I wholeheartedly agree.
“If you put yourself in a position where you have to stretch outside your comfort zone, then you are forced to expand your consciousness.”
—Les Brown
The process of hatching is about accepting the call of your next purpose. It is about:
•Recognizing when the time is right to move out of your comfort zone.
•Self-discovery and learning the move is just one level up at a time.
•Intuition and responsiveness to the spirit inside of you to be all that you were created to be.
I love the army’s affirmation, “Be All That You Can Be.” To me, that’s exactly what it means to hatch! You are allowing a space that has become restricted to open up for the possibility of more. You are tapping into the special place in your mind that ignites the desire to break the shells of limitations, fears, doubts, and restrictions to become the best version of yourself.
One of the key indicators that you may be entering a season of hatching is that you begin to experience a sense of dissatisfaction with your current status. This can happen all of a sudden, or perhaps you feel it beginning to brew over time, but somehow you start to feel as if something is missing or needs to change.
I clearly recall when I first entered the place of hatching and how I was confronted with feelings of duality. Even though I had a full load of A-list clients and was indeed an expert in my field, there was still a nagging truth that I had to face. All of a sudden, I felt as if there was something missing in my day-to-day routine. I started having an ongoing internal conversation with myself that always ended with, I know that there is more I should be doing. And, even if I did not say it out loud, I was growing weary of knowing that, while I was safe in my egg, I wasn’t feeling fulfilled.
Since I could not put my finger on exactly what was happening to me, I did not try to break free for quite a while. But the more things stayed the same, the more I felt the growing need for something to break up the monotony. Actually, I began to feel stranded inside a world in which I had once been so free!
What do you do when you are feeling stuck? I am sure that quite a few folks have had this feeling on the road to success, and they may offer several different roadmaps for getting loose. But, in hindsight, there were a few things that I did (and still do) when I realized that it was time for me to hatch. Following are my suggestions:
•Accept and acknowledge where you are, so you are able to move forward. Feeling stuck does not feel good. It is even slightly embarrassing to admit, because, doesn’t everyone want to appear like they have it all together? But the truth is, we all feel stuck at some point in our lives. Understanding and accepting that reality will help you get unstuck.
•Feeling stuck is internal. It is your perception…and what I love about perception is that, when you change how you see things, things begin to change. You have to take responsibility for your life.
•Become still. Consider all that you are dealing with and what you have a desire to do. You may come to a point where you realize that your life is about to change, perhaps dramatically. During a hatching stage, we have to find time to be still and listen to our inner selves. There’s a transformation happening. Your frustration of immobilization is part of the opening to freedom.
•Prepare to choose wisely; do not rush. In this time of searching your inner self, you are on the way to deciding what comes next. There were a lot of moments when I sat and stared at my journal, simply considering the possibilities of what could be missing from my life and what was going on inside of my head. I was not sure what was I looking for, so I could not be in a rush, even though I did not like living with the feeling of uncertainty.
•It is not just about you. Realize that when hatching happens and urges you to press forward, it is not just about personal gain. It is because a greater need is being fulfilled through you. True fulfillment is connected to something bigger than you.
As I was going through all of these feelings and inward journeys, I felt like a baby bird stuck at the bottom of my shell. I felt so many different emotions. As comfortable as I was with my assured A-list of clients, there was something inside me itching to come out. I decided I needed to break away from fundraising full-time to give space to my creativity, passions, and dreams.
What would hatching be like for you? What makes you feel the need to break away? If you allowed yourself to leave your place of comfort to get the life of fulfillment that most of us seek, what would you be doing? What is stopping you from moving in that direction? The honest answer may be that you are doing what you have to because you do not see the path to get to your passion project. Hatching is taking the first step of believing that you can and should pursue your passions.
I remember talking to my sister-friend Patrice Greer about this unusual and very uncomfortable time in my life. My life ambitions seemed perfectly normal to her, but I told her I felt dark and empty inside, with thoughts that were nearly crippling me. A few days later, she sent me a song by India Arie called “Break the Shell.” I could not believe it—India was singing the words and describing exactly what I needed to set myself free. I must have listened to the song fifty times that day alone. It became my anthem for the next year of my life.
Although the process of hatching is one that can be scary, it is also liberating and completely fulfilling. As I listened to the words of that song, I realized that I had forgotten who I was. On paper, it looked like I knew myself, and I even believed it most of the time, but, as I began hatching, it was clear that I had forgotten the me of the moment. How can you begin to understand who you were meant to be when you have forgotten who you are? During the ongoing hatching process, I wondered if things would have been different or better if I had not made certain mistakes or experienced a tart, lemon-filled life before learning how to make lemonade. Living afraid of feeling hurt or failing was not going to be my path any longer. I had to take my chances and hatch.
When you have grown to full term inside your shell, the space that was once a just-right fit becomes tight and uncomfortable. Hatching provides not only new opportunities, but also newfound freedom to expand to your next level. Then there is your new viewpoint that comes with hatching. At the moment you decide to break free from who you were and hatch, a new light appears as your shell’s surface is cracked wide open. The light shines a path for you to go that way, try this option, explore, grow, do, be! I know hatching is easier said than done. Trust me, it took nearly twenty years for me to take that first step. My advice for you is:
•Do it scared. The fear will disappear as soon as you make the first move.
•Follow the breath of your heart. Trust that you will grow into the person you feel, think, and believe you are in your heart and mind.
•Do all things in love. Love covers a multitude of sins. When you operate in love, fear and doubt are silenced.
•Be present. The best part of hatching is to be present. If you are able to spend less time worrying about your past or future, you could assess your current shell and crack it wide open.
The more you understand, the better a position you will be in to open up and begin the process of hatching. I think the greatest lesson is to understand that you can learn so much about your personal hatch experiences through close observation. Breaking out of a shell initially can be shocking. But remember, this place is new and unfamiliar, so it is critically important for you to be fully aware of your surroundings before exposing yourself to the elements and vultures waiting on the sidelines. They often have a nose for vulnerability and frailty.
Hatching is the beginning of something uncomfortable at first, but beautiful