a Life That’s Serendipitous by Design (It’s Okay to Ask for Help)
Introduction
Forge Your Own Path
AS I WRITE THIS BOOK, I am twenty-eight years old. I am a successful entrepreneur, and a single mother with two young children. I didn’t expect to be single again at this point in my life, but after five years of marriage, I realized that I’d been living in a dreamworld where my vows and all that I thought marriage stood for were worth absolutely nothing, every ounce of joy in my life was sucked right out of me. I questioned me. I questioned the decisions I had made. And, I questioned my own self-worth.
I could have let this experience defeat me, but I refused to let someone else determine the story of my life. I knew that my story wasn’t over yet—not by a long shot—and I was determined to succeed regardless of the obstacles in my path. I would succeed on my own terms and no one else’s.
At age nineteen, I cofounded Sugarleaf Vineyards near Charlottesville, Virginia, my first major success as an entrepreneur. This was followed by my next successful business—Luxury Market Branding (LMB), a strategic marketing and branding company, located in my home base of New York City. In 2011, after nearly a year of advising technology start-ups on their marketing and branding strategies, I branched out into a new field when I became a founding partner of Gen Y Capital Partners, an early stage venture capital firm targeting Gen Y technology start-ups.
With each new venture, I learned important lessons that have helped prepare me for the next stage in my life—for the next business relationship and the next venture. And while I didn’t see it at the time, there were valuable lessons to be learned when my marriage collapsed. The experience made me an impeccable judge of character, morality, and integrity. It also made me crystal clear about who I was as a human being, separate from the titles of wife, mother, daughter, mentor, philanthropist, and entrepreneur. The experience brought my understanding of what I wanted both personally and professionally into laser-sharp focus, and it helped me redefine my own path—in business and in life.
This is my story. It is a continuous journey with many ups and downs; countless highs and lows. At the core, this is a memoir of identity, perseverance, and the ability to achieve success on your own terms while building upon your passions. As you read this book, try to keep three ideas in mind: Serendipity is powerful. Know who you want to be in a relationship with. Know what you want your reputation to be.
I am a huge believer in the power of serendipity. I don’t plan out every single move I am going to make as an entrepreneur or businessperson. Instead, I let unplanned opportunities arrive when they do, and then I act on them quickly if they are worthwhile. Although I don’t plan for these serendipitous opportunities, I am able to leverage them because (1) they are naturally attracted to me, (2) I’m ready for them when they arrive, and (3) I don’t hesitate to seize them when the time is right. You’ll understand exactly how powerful serendipity is in my life when you read the story in Chapter 3 of Ido Leffler and the business we are building together.
While it would be great to have a business relationship with every incredible entrepreneur on the face of this earth, it isn’t possible, and it wouldn’t be desirable, even if it were possible. So, I constantly ask myself, “Who do I want to be in a relationship with?” Since you can only build relationships with a limited number of people, why not focus your energy on relationships with men and women who will provide you with the best path to your goals?
I also regularly ask myself, “What do I want my reputation to be?” I am very conscious about my reputation and what people think about me. In my entrepreneurial world, my reputation is one of my most important assets and it’s something that I constantly monitor, nurture, and care for. I can’t afford a bad reputation, and frankly, neither can you.
Through this memoir, my hope is that I can provide you with powerful, real-world advice, as well as concrete examples from my entrepreneurial life—and from the lives of other entrepreneurs I have worked with and admire—so that you can learn from them and put them to use in your own career and ventures. I want you to realize that you can redefine your own path, because it’s not as difficult as you might think. You can do it if you decide it’s important enough for you to break free of the constraints that are holding you down and keeping you from doing what you really want to do.
Throughout