use, I will change.
A change has taken place, one so fundamental that it will not yield to pain, doubt, or denial. Whether one likes it or not, the change in self is here to stay.
∼Chemically Dependent Anonymous P 79
March 13
[T]he Realm of the Spirit is broad, roomy, all inclusive; {…}. When, therefore, we speak to you of God, we mean your own conception of God. ∼Alcoholics Anonymous P 46-47
God, as we understand him, is such a beautiful concept. C.D.A. does not have a preset description of our Higher Power, instead, we are free to choose our own spiritual source—be it God, Group, or Goodness. Chemically Dependent Anonymous holds fast to the precept of utilizing, as a foundation for recovery, a power greater than ourselves and of our own understanding as discussed in A.A.’s Big Book and C.D.A.’s First Edition. Our concept of God is not etched in concrete, but dynamic, flowing, and flexible as we grow and learn spiritual principles. For instance, God, used as an acronym, has been viewed by many of us at one time or another as: Get Out Devil; Group Of Druggies; Group Of Drunks; Giver Of Desires; Give Over Decisions; Great OutDoors; and Good Orderly Direction.
What is my concept of a Higher Power?
It’s a GOD thing.
The only thing remaining, before we begin to delve into our former lives, is to open our minds and hearts to the concept of a Higher Power.
∼Chemically Dependent Anonymous P 106
March 14
If you haven’t got anything nice to say about anybody, come sit next to me. ~Alice Roosevelt Longworth
When we were using, we often talked about people in negative ways behind their backs. Gossip was just a part of our daily life. Many of us were intolerant of the differences between ourselves and others. Even if we didn’t talk behind other people’s backs, we may have abrasively said unkind things directly to their faces! Once we begin working the Steps, the time arrives when we realize people are only doing the best they can, just like us. In C.D.A., we are a diverse group of people seeking recovery. At times, each of us falls short. Instead of taking others’ inventories, both in and out of the Program, we would do better to focus on helping them up when they are down, and rejoice in their triumphs when they are on top of the world!
The only time I should be looking down on another is when I’m helping them up.
Obvious social, and sometimes moral issues arise when such a diverse group of addicted people as we are gathered in the Chemically Dependent Anonymous setting.
∼Chemically Dependent Anonymous P 16
March 15
Anybody tell you today that they love you? ~Allen B.
Having destroyed much of our lives, we come to the Program as outcasts. We hit a hard bottom and wind up in C.D.A. How baffling to see so many people reach their hands out and offer us their help. This, for many of us, is the first time we witness unconditional love. It seems these people love us no matter what our past. As time goes on, we get in relationships with others in the Program that become very special. These can be relationships with sponsors, sponsees, or simply fellow members with whom we’ve formed special bonds. No matter how much time we have, we continue to talk openly about where we are and what we’ve done. We share emotions, get things off our mind, and don’t hide skeletons in the closet. People we trust are able to offer advice or simply listen. This ability to be open is a very special gift. It’s also how we stay clean and sober for long periods of time. In fact, it is considered selfish and self-centered not to share on this level in order to help others.
Today, I will tell someone I love them.
I never thought I'd find people like myself, but C.D.A. is open to all addictive people{…}. Their love is what kept me alive for the first month.
~Chemically Dependent Anonymous P 215
March 16
The cure for boredom is curiosity. There is no cure for curiosity. ~Ellen Parr
Sometimes we find ourselves bored with recovery. We go to the same meetings and hear the same people say the same things. We may consider not going to meetings at all because we could be doing something else. This is a time when we need to make some changes. We can go to different meetings, get involved in service work, or find a really sick newcomer and sponsor them. Finding out how the Fellowship is organized is also a good way to fight boredom in recovery. Starting a new meeting, or taking meetings into rehabs and institutions are also ways to get excited again. The message is: Get out of self. We need to look around and see where we can give back. It doesn't even need to be in the rooms of recovery. We can get involved in our own communities, which could lead us in completely new directions. Before we know it, we will wonder how we ever could have said we were “bored.”
Today, I look for ways to become
curious about my recovery.
Having institution commitments is a godsend, especially when I've been feeling a little down.
~Chemically Dependent Anonymous P 122
March 17
And living and letting live contributes a great deal to sanity. ~Father John Doe
In order to live and let live, we have to get past surviving. “Surviving” is a desperate place where no energy is left for enrichment and self-nourishment. “Living” is when we finally learn to be good to ourselves, and truly enjoy what life on planet Earth has to offer. “Letting live” is the ability to allow others to nourish themselves without our direction. What a concept! Letting others make their own decisions without our direction. This is a form of true love; the unconditional type that so many of us strive to obtain. Until recovery, most of us never learned to really live life; we were only interested in surviving. Learning to live was the beginning stages of recovery. When we finally learn to let live, we truly begin to incorporate what our spiritual path is all about—love and service to others.
When I live and let live,
I teach myself to love.
Now, in recovery, we must begin to take care of ourselves if we are to survive, sober, and to grow. The program provides us with the tools and the support necessary to enable us to become ‘real people.’
∼Chemically Dependent Anonymous P 92
March 18
The question is, how far down the rabbit hole do you want to go? ~What the Bleep do we Know?
Going down the rabbit hole is a metaphor for losing control. At one time, that loss of control meant being on psychedelics or drunk out of our minds. Today, our rabbit holes are character defects. When we lose our temper, are perpetually late, shamelessly criticize, or quick to condemn, we are falling down a rabbit hole. We know we are falling, but knowing is not enough. Even thinking we won’t fall again is not enough. If having the right thoughts were enough, we wouldn’t need C.D.A. Few of us had a shortage of good thoughts when it came to controlling the use of drugs. And yet, when that craving hit, our minds cleverly found a handy excuse to use “just one more time.” Then, down the rabbit hole we went. Ultimately, we see that our very best thoughts can’t save us. Instead, we find it is only our very best actions that will keep us out of the rabbit hole. Recovery has little to do with thinking or theories; it is our actions that count.
I don’t think myself into right action.
I act myself into right thinking.
I started to build a pathway of program action, and that opened up the world for me.
∼Chemically