of our most precious asset to another. We fall under the influence of substances, possessions, or entertainment. And when we do, our life is no longer our own. Identify the recurring controlling substances (addictions) in your life and humbly seek the help needed to remove their influence over you.
Temptations that trip us. Like addictions, we each have unique weaknesses to temptation. These temptations may vary in nature, but each detract from the fullest life possible. But they do not need to define us. We can begin anew. However, only those who can identify and admit their mistakes in the past have opportunity to learn from them.
Learning styles that suit us. We all learn differently. Some are visual learners, some are verbal, some learn best in a group setting, while others learn best alone. Your learning style is as unique to you as your fingerprint. The important thing is to recognize and understand what style suits you best. This life ought to be filled with constant learning, and the sooner we recognize how we learn best, the sooner we’ll begin to grow in it.
Motivations that compel us. Deep in our heart, our motivation runs supreme. It determines the decisions we make, the use of our time, and the words we choose to use. Understanding our deepest motivations is a difficult task. It requires stillness, patience, and consistent self-evaluation. But the more we discover why we do the things we do, the easier it is for us to make the most of the present we are living in today. If we start asking the right questions, there are countless life-giving lessons we can learn from our past. Never feel that you must be defined by it. But it would be equally foolish to forget it completely when it offers so much potential for the present.
11. Remember Things Could be Worse.
What's coming will come and we'll meet it when it does. — Hagrid
Should you ever find yourself the victim of other people’s bitterness, smallness, or insecurities, remember, things could be worse—you could be them.
Things could have been worse than they are now, and this thought alone is a solace that should help us cope with life’s most depressing moments.
12. Think of it as an Opportunity.
Every time things happen in your life that you cannot control, think of them as stepping stones to a better and bigger phase of your life. Often, opportunities come shrouded in the weighty matters of life. Those times when things aren’t going smoothly and well are the prime times for opportunities to manifest. An experienced entrepreneur knows the most barren of places come packed with the best of fertile opportunities.
A pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity; an optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty. — Winston S. Churchill
Opportunity. We all love that word. It is a word that inspires hope, as well as something we can wish upon to make our lives better. It is a single event that will smash into us, enlighten us, and take us away on its fluffy-feathered wings where we will live happily ever after. Unfortunately, that is not the case for most of us.
Real opportunities are like the sales people that knock on our door or call us while we eat dinner at night. We don’t want to open the door because we are irritated, we think we know how it is going to pan out, or we are too scared to say “no” when they ask us a question. Opportunity is just as much dependent on our views and attitude about the world as it is on our external circumstances.
When we actively change our thinking and perception toward a more opportunistic mindset, we can invite and take advantage of more opportunities in our daily lives.
Many people are perfectly capable of discovering opportunities that greatly benefit their lives, but they unknowingly ignore these opportunities. This is because much of opportunity is based on our way of seeing things.
Real opportunities are the ones that we don’t immediately see. They come by at the most unexpected, most inopportune, times. We are so obsessed with other distractions or our own opinions that we normally miss most opportunities that fall across our path.
When we do see opportunities, we treat them the same way as we treat the inappropriate sales people – with disdain and a bad attitude. Our attitude when opportunity presents itself determines whether that opportunity will make our lives better. Francis Bacon said that the wise man will make more opportunities than he finds. Benjamin Franklin, in answering a question posed to him (What is the recipe for successful achievement?)— said, “There are four essential ingredients, the most important being seizing opportunities.” Bruce Lee also said, “To hell with circumstances; I create opportunities. Opportunities are a lot like self-fulfilling prophecies. Don’t let your opportunity pass because you are looking through the wrong door. Even when opportunity knocks, a man still must get up off his seat and open the door.
13. Come up with Ideas to Turn Negative Thoughts into Positive Thoughts.
At any given point in our lives, we’ve watched in bewilderment how great leaders and innovators maintain a seemingly unshakable positive outlook on life, no matter what setbacks they face.
See the positive side, the potential, and make an effort. — Dalai Lama
Being skeptical about all the “new age” ideas about how you can suddenly go from a realistic or negative mindset to a positive one by saying affirmations, or journaling, or any of the other fads that don’t seem to change anything is also a perfectly normal feeling.
But beyond the skepticism, the Mayo Clinic has published that these health benefits may all be linked to positive thinking…
Increased life span.
Lower rates of depression.
Lower levels of distress.
Greater resistance to the common cold.
Better psychological and physical wellbeing
Reduced risk of death from cardiovascular disease.
Better coping skills during hardships and times of stress.
Michelle U’s study on combating negativity is summarized in the ten points below:
Meditate or do yoga.One of the first things I did was head to a yoga class. It took my focus away from my thoughts and brought my attention to my breath. Yoga is also very relaxing, which helped ease my mind. Yoga helped me stay present to my experience so instead of jumping to what could happen, it brought me back to the now—the only moment, the most important moment.
SmileI didn't do much of this during the weekend, so I literally had to bring myself in front of a mirror and force myself to smile. It really does help change your mood and relieve stress. I also felt lighter because it takes fewer muscles to smile than to frown.
Surround yourself with positive peopleI called a friend who I knew could give me constructive yet loving feedback. When you're stuck in a negative spiral, talk to people who can put things into perspective and won’t feed your negative thinking.
Change the tone of your thoughts from negative to positiveFor example, instead of thinking, “We are going to have a hard time adjusting to our living situation,” think, “We will face some challenges in our living situation, but we will come up with solutions that we will both be happy with.”
Don't play the victim. You create your life—take responsibility.The way I was thinking and acting, you would think I was stuck. Even if our living situation becomes unbearable, there is always a way out. I will always have the choice to make change happen, if need be.
Help someone.Take the focus away from you and do something nice for another person. I decided to make a tray of food and donate it to the Salvation Army. It took my mind off things and I felt better for helping someone else.
Remember that no one is perfect and let yourself move forward.It's easy to dwell on your mistakes. I felt terrible that I acted this way and that I wasted our weekend. The only thing I can do now is learn from