on him.
But finding out the truth about how she had used him had made him cynical and less willing to open his heart in subsequent relationships. He dated regularly but commitment was something he avoided. Friends of his were marrying and having families now but he had no plans to join them any time soon. He didn’t want to end up like his father, loving someone so much that he couldn’t function properly without them.
His gaze drifted to Lexi’s sparkling engagement ring. He felt a ridge come up in his throat as he pictured her walking down the aisle towards that nameless, faceless man. She would be smiling radiantly, looking amazingly beautiful, blissfully happy to be marrying the man she loved.
Engaged.
The word was a jarring reminder.
Lexi was engaged.
The three words were a life sentence.
Sam gave himself a mental shake. ‘I’ll get my secretary to make a donation on my behalf,’ he said. ‘Now, if you’ll excuse me …’ He pushed against the fire-escape door with his shoulder.
‘There is a lift, you know,’ Lexi said.
‘Yes, I know, but I prefer the exercise.’
She glanced at the lift again before returning her gaze to where Sam was holding the fire-escape door open. She gave him a tight little smile that had a hint of stubbornness to it and brushed past him to make her way up the stairs. He felt his body kick start like a racing-car engine when her slim hip brushed against his thigh. It was probably not deliberate as there wasn’t a lot of space to spare. She went ahead of him up the stairs, another bad idea in spite of it being chivalrous on his part. He got a perfect view of her neat bottom and long legs as she made her way up. He tried not to think of those long legs wrapped around him in passion and that beautiful hair of hers flung out over his pillow.
He had lain awake for the last week, sifting through every moment he had spent with her five years ago. From the very first second when her blue gaze had met his across that crowded room he had felt the lightning strike of physical attraction. It had rooted him to the spot. He had felt like a starstruck fan meeting their idol for the first time. He had barely been able to string a few words together when she approached him. Whatever he had said must have amused her for he remembered the tinkling bell of her laugh and how it had made his skin lift in a shiver.
They had left the gathering together and they had barely surfaced from his tiny flat for the next two weeks. For the first time during his career he had neglected his studies. The thick surgical textbooks had sat on his desk opposite his bed, staring at him in a surly silence. And he had pointedly ignored them while he had indulged in an affair that had been so hot and erotic he could hardly believe it had been happening to him. The physical intensity of it had surpassed anything before or since. He had relished every moment with Lexi in his arms. She had been an adventurous and enthusiastic, even at times playful lover. He suspected she’d had a fair bit of experience, perhaps much more than him, but they hadn’t talked about it. Looking back, he realised she hadn’t said much about herself at all, even though he had tried to draw her out several times. In hindsight he could see why she had been so reluctant to reveal herself to him emotionally. There had been no emotional commitment on her part. She had simply wanted to create a storm with her father and had used him to summon up the thunderclouds.
‘Why did you pretend we didn’t know each other last week when you were visiting Bella?’ Lexi asked, stopping in mid-climb to look back at him over her shoulder.
Sam almost ran into the back of her. He felt the warmth of her body and got another delicious waft of her perfume. ‘I didn’t think it was wise to advertise the fact that we’d once been involved,’ he said.
‘Not good for your career?’ she asked with one of her pert looks.
He frowned up at her. ‘It has nothing to do with my career. I wasn’t sure if your sister knew about us. I’d not met her before. I was playing it safe for your sake.’
‘She wasn’t at the dinner where we met,’ Lexi said. ‘But she remembered the dreadful fallout after my father found out we were seeing each other.’
Sam’s frown deepened. It had niggled at him a bit that he had never actually seen or spoken to her after her father had approached him with that ultimatum. For the last five years he had just assumed she had run back to the family fortress at her father’s bidding. Her little show of rebellion had achieved its aim. She had got her father’s attention back solely on her. Back then, Lexi had struck Sam as the type of girl who would never do anything to permanently jeopardise her prized position as Daddy’s Little Girl. She would go so far and no further. It was her way of working things to her advantage, or so he had thought.
But what if things hadn’t been quite the way her father had said? Lexi had implied on his first day at SHH that she’d had no idea he had gone to the States. Why hadn’t she been told where he had gone? Why hadn’t she asked? Or had her father deliberately kept her in the dark, perhaps forbidding her to mention Sam’s name in his presence, like some sort of overbearing aristocrat father from the past? Was it deluded of him to hope she had invested more in their relationship than her father had suggested? Was it his male pride that wanted it that way instead of feeling like some sort of cheap gigolo who had served his purpose and now meant nothing to her? Had never meant anything to her?
‘Your father is well-known for his temper,’ he said. ‘I hope it wasn’t too rough a time for you back then.’
A flicker of something moved over her face but within a blink it was gone, making him wonder if he had imagined it. She gave her head a little toss and turned and continued walking up the fire escape. ‘I know how to handle my father,’ she said.
Sam followed her up another few steps. ‘Why didn’t you ask him where I’d gone?’ he asked.
He saw her back tighten like a rod of steel before she slowly turned to face him at the fire-escape door. ‘Here’s the fourth floor,’ she announced like a lift operator.
‘Why didn’t you ask your father, Lexi?’ he asked again.
Her blue eyes clashed with his, a spark of cynicism making them appear hard and worldly. ‘Why would I do that?’ she asked. ‘I had a new boyfriend within a few days. Did you really think I was pining after you? Give me a break, country boy. You were fun but not that much fun.’
Sam ground his teeth as he joined her on the landing, conscious of the tight space and the warmth coming off both of their bodies from the exercise. Lexi’s breathing rate had increased slightly, making her beautiful breasts rise and fall behind her camisole. He allowed himself a brief little eye-lock but then wished he hadn’t. She was temptation personified. He had never wanted to kiss someone more in his life. Did she know she was having this effect on him? How could she not? He was doing his best to disguise it but there was only so much he could do. He was a red-blooded male after all, and she was all sexy, nubile woman.
He thrust the door open out of the fire escape and nodded for her to go through. She walked past him, this time not touching him. He felt the loss keenly. His body ached to feel her, to touch her, to bring her close against him, to feel every part of her respond to him as she had in the past. It frustrated him that she still had that power over him. It wasn’t supposed to be like this now.
Engaged.
Lexi was engaged.
For heaven’s sake, why wasn’t his body getting the message?
‘Is this your office?’ she asked as she came to a frosted glass door halfway along the corridor.
‘Yes.’ He stood at the door, pointedly waiting for her to leave.
She peered past his shoulder. ‘Aren’t you going to show me around?’ she asked.
‘Alexis,’ he began. ‘I don’t think—’
‘I want your shirt,’ she said with a determined look in her blue gaze.
I