he couldn’t help it. Reality was hard and cold when you spent most of your time in the dream world. And it seemed Lila Maxwell did a lot of dreaming.
Bothered that he’d hurt her, Nick changed the subject. He was not in the business of fixing hurts. He’d learned not to care after Amelia had slipped away from him into a drug-induced coma that was her only escape from the pain her cancer-ridden body felt—24/7.
“How was the office while I was gone?” he asked, trying to sound casual.
At first, he thought she wasn’t going to answer. She glanced over at him. She fingered her scarf with her pearl-pink colored nails and the image of those fingers on his thigh imprinted itself in his head.
“Not busy. A few more rumors than usual.”
Focus, man. “What kind?”
She smiled, and his inseam felt tight. Damn, but she caused a reaction that was close to nuclear in him.
“Oh, you know, the ones where we’re all booted out the door.”
“You think they’re unfounded?” Nick asked. He’d been hearing similar things overseas.
“I work close to the top and we haven’t heard anything substantial, have we?”
Nick sighed and grunted. The turn into Colette, Inc. was busy with employees all arriving at work, and though it didn’t require his full concentration, Nick gave himself to the task. He didn’t look at Lila again until he’d pulled his Porsche to a stop in the spot designated as his. He hoped for once that Lila’s sharp mind would miss his non-answer.
A quick glance at her showed she hadn’t. He pulled his keys from the ignition and reached for the door handle, but her hand on his arm stopped him.
“Have we, Nick?”
Lying went against the grain. Nick believed that life’s little lessons were best served cold. But Lila’s heart was in her big brown eyes and she looked scared. Though it had been a long, long time since he’d wanted to protect any woman, he suddenly didn’t want to shake Lila’s world.
He faced her and leaned close.
“Not yet.”
“That isn’t a no,” she said quietly.
The confines of the car put them so close together that he could feel each inhalation of air she took as she breathed. Staring at her pink lips, Nick wondered idly if his breath was now filling her lungs, filling her body with life, and he had the urge to fill her with something more real. He didn’t want to be satisfied with the fact that their appearance impressed vendors and visiting executives in the office. He wanted them to be together, physically.
Nick knew on a basic level that he was trying to hide from the fact that his safe haven, Colette, Inc., had turned into a battleground, but it was more than that. He leaned closer to Lila, not stopping until he could taste the air she was breathing, her lips softening under his, her hand on his arm clutching helplessly at his sleeve.
He knew that he was in for a world of hurt if he pursued her this way. But the world had gone crazy, and the carefully sheltered life he’d built for himself was crumbling. The only thing that looked solid was Lila Maxwell.
Lila moaned deep in her throat and opened her mouth under his. All thoughts of keeping things light and simple vanished. His blood roared in his ears, and his body screamed for more. Her mouth was soft, warm, wet…welcoming on this cold October day.
She clung to him as if the moment had taken her by surprise, too. Her tongue responded shyly to his. It had been forever since a woman hadn’t thrust her own tongue into his mouth before he’d even wanted her there.
Nick pulled her closer, groaning when the gearshift ground into his hip. He pulled away. “Damn.”
Lila stared at him as if she’d never seen him before. Her lips were swollen and her face was flushed. Tendrils of her perfectly styled hair surrounded her heart-shaped face. She was mussed and he wanted her more so.
He wanted that glorious hair spread on his navy pillowcase, those rosy lips swollen from his spent passion. He wanted his sweat and hers drying on their bodies. But he knew he couldn’t put the car in Reverse and take them both to his home where they could spend the day in his king-size bed.
“Damn.”
“You already said that.”
“Some things need repeating.”
Her hands trembled as she tucked the escaped strands back into place. “What happened here, Nick?”
“I want you, Lila.”
“Because of work?” she asked, not looking at him. Instead, she pulled her compact from her purse and repaired her lipstick.
Her armor was back and the dewy woman who’d been next to him just a minute before was gone. In her place was his ultra-efficient secretary. And he resented that. He couldn’t pull out a mirror and makeup and smooth away signs of passion as easily as she had. “Because of you.”
She gulped. “I’m not ready for this. I still think of you as my boss.”
“Well, start thinking of me as your man.”
He opened his door and got out. The air was cold but didn’t cool the heat flowing through him. He wasn’t going to be able to focus on anything in the office except that his wide cherrywood desk was big enough to support the weight of one slender blonde.
Lila met him on the sidewalk and brushed past him. He stopped her with a firm hand on her arm.
“What’s the hurry?”
“I don’t want anyone to see us coming in together.”
“Don’t be ridiculous. At least five people saw me pick you up this morning. And even more saw us pull into the parking lot.”
“True. But I don’t want anyone to get the wrong impression.”
“Are you really that concerned with what others think?”
She nodded.
“Don’t be. They aren’t worth your time.”
“You only say that because it’s always the woman who comes out sounding like she’s easy.”
“Trust me, Lila, the last thing you are is easy.”
“I know that, but other women…”
“If anyone says anything to you, tell me and I’ll silence them.”
She smiled. “Like Hannibal?”
“No. Like Dirty Harry.”
“Death?”
“Intimidation.”
“You’re not as scary as you think you are.”
“Neither are you.”
“I’m not trying to scare you,” she said and walked quickly inside the building.
But you are, he thought. Because a part of him was afraid she’d mean more to him than any of the brief affairs he’d had since Amelia’s death two years ago, and that wasn’t in the cards.
Two
The buzz around the office was that Colette, Inc. had a new board member who was planning on making some changes at the top. Lila returned from a quick clerical meeting led by Suzy, the Administrative Assistant in Human Resources, not feeling as upbeat about her job as she had a day ago.
She stowed her purse and tried to concentrate on her work, but the presentation she was creating couldn’t hold her attention.
Dammit!
“Can you come into my office and take a memo?” Nick asked. Anger seethed around him in a cloud. He looked dark and menacing, not like the man who’d been