looked at the equipment covering the desk alongside him. He lifted and replaced a camera, the hunch of his wide shoulders indicating his discomfort. Izzy hated that she drew no satisfaction from that...only sadness.
He turned. “I want you to come and show your face to the people who care about you. Kate said—”
“Kate had no right to say anything to you.” She lifted her chin. “I’m fine.”
“Then come to the beach.”
“No.”
He crossed his arms. “Why not? What good is it doing you, hiding away in here twenty-four-seven?”
“I’m not hiding.” Liar. “My work is better than it’s ever been. I have lots to keep me busy, and I don’t need you or a damn beach party to make me feel better.”
“This isn’t who you are, Iz. You’ve always worked, always been ambitious, but everyone is used to you taking pictures while you play as well as work. Where have you gone? Don’t you think Robbie would’ve wanted you to step out into the sunlight now and then?”
The sound of her brother’s name on Trent’s lips brought the sting of tears to her eyes. “Don’t talk to me about Robbie. He would want me to do whatever I wanted, and right now the last thing I want to do is talk to you.” She turned her back to him and tossed the bear into a plastic crate of other props. She sighed. “Please, Trent. Just get out of here.”
“You know as well as I do that Robbie wanted us together. He actively encouraged it.”
“Yeah, he did and look how that turned out.”
His jaw tightened. “Are you saying it was no good? That we were no good? God, Iz, Robbie would’ve loved knowing we finally got together.”
Loss wrapped around her heart, making it ache. “Maybe, but he would’ve also seen we were a bad idea together too.”
Hurt flashed in his eyes, before he exhaled heavily. “Look, you might not want to talk to me, but there’s someone else we have to think about.”
She planted her hands on her hips, her body humming with irritation and the urge to grip him by his stupidly large biceps and march him out of her studio. Didn’t he realize he was invading her only place of peace? “Who?”
“Maya Jackson. We have to do this calendar, Iz. We promised. If we don’t set up the shoot soon, it won’t be ready for Christmas. That little girl, her family and Kate are relying on you...us...to do this.”
She tipped her head back and glared at the ceiling. There was no way she’d let down Maya, suffering so acutely with leukemia, any more than she would continue a relationship with the firefighter who’d failed to respond quick enough to save her brother. No matter how the results of the ensuing investigation had confirmed that it was a falling beam that killed Robbie at the garage, she had to blame someone or she’d go insane.
The safest person to blame was strong, reliable Trent. A man she’d grown to deeply care for and admire during the four years before Robbie died. A man who knew her and her brother. Knew her home and her life...and who still wanted to know her.
He didn’t deserve her derision; he didn’t deserve everything she threw at him, yet time and again he became her target. She had to keep his interest at bay. Better still—stop it altogether.
She dropped her chin. “Fine. I’ll call Kate and set up a meeting. I don’t see how that has any bearing on my going to a beach party. I’ll call you when you need to be involved with the calendar, okay?”
“No, it’s not okay. I wanted you before the explosion and I want you now. Why are you shutting me out like this? What good is it doing you?”
“For your information, I’m doing just fine. Just forget about us. We aren’t right for each other.”
“Why? Because I’m a firefighter?”
The disbelief in his tone hitched her stretched nerves tighter. “You’re too different. I’ve told you this before. I want more than you’ll ever be able to give me.”
“Like what?” His gaze burned with frustration. “You don’t want a man who can care for you, look after you and treat you how you deserve?”
She closed her eyes. She wanted all of those things. So much. “You really don’t understand what I’m saying, do you?”
“No.”
“Because it’s you, Trent.” Izzy opened her eyes, her heart aching. “Before Robbie died, I was reluctant to date you because half the female population wants to sleep with you. Now that Robbie’s gone, I would never, ever go out with a firefighter. Whether he was you or not.”
The silence stretched. Izzy fought not to squirm under his appraisal, fought not to reach forward for one blessed kiss from a man any woman would be a fool not to want. Well, better a fool than a grieving girlfriend.
His eyes darkened with determination. “I’m not giving up on you, Iz. You can fight me as much as you want. I won’t give up. If we’re nothing else, I hope we’re still friends.”
“For God’s sake, what is it you want from me?” Her eyes filled with tears. “I didn’t ask you to look after me. Why do you feel you have the right to keep hassling me?”
“Hassling you? I’m not hassling you, I’m caring about you. You accused me of hassling you before Robbie died... Nothing’s changed.”
“Nothing’s... How dare you? Everything’s changed.” Her cheeks burned hot as her traitorous tears slipped to her cheeks. She swiped at them with trembling fingers. “Everything. If you can’t see that, then I have less to say to you than I thought.”
He briefly closed his eyes. “I didn’t mean that the way it came out.”
“No? Then if you can’t think before you speak, why would I want to spend time with someone that insensitive?”
“Iz, please. Just come to the beach party tonight and I promise if you don’t have a good time, or at least relax awhile, I won’t bother you again.” He raised his hands in surrender. “I’ll respect whatever it is you’re doing on your own and leave you be.”
“On my own. Something you, Kate and every other person with a family alive and well will never understand.” As soon as the words were out of her mouth, she regretted them. She’d revealed every ounce of her vulnerability. She crossed her arms and dragged her gaze from the humiliating sympathy in his expression to look toward the window behind him. “Is Kate going? Is this invite some way to get her and me talking again?” She looked at him. “I just told you I’ll call her and get things in motion with the calendar.”
“I don’t know if she’ll be there or not.” He stepped toward her and then stopped as though he changed his mind. He shoved his hand into his dark hair and held it there. “Doesn’t the fact that you two aren’t talking show you something is seriously wrong? You need people around you who care. Work doesn’t do what a hug can.”
She frowned. “A hug? You think a hug is all it will take to get rid of this pain?”
“No, but it will go a damn sight further than making another bundle of money will. Just take a break.”
Izzy glared. She’d made more money in the last few weeks than she ever thought possible. Her phone was ringing nonstop with assignments. It seemed the photography world, and collectors, relished pictures leaning more toward the dark than the dazzling. It was true the money had done nothing to alleviate her grief, but the work provided her with something to stop her thinking about her dead brother.
He cleared his throat. “You need something to take your mind off Robbie.”
She blinked. “I have that.”
“Let me guess...work.”
Asshole.
Their