of controlling the way her heart pitter-pattered.
Or the way the breath hitched in her throat.
His gaze lowered to her mouth and his eyes darkened to a deep stormy blue. The air between them crackled with energy and electricity.
He shot off the sofa. ‘Goodnight, Nicola.’
Pitter-patter. Pitter-patter. She closed her eyes. ‘Goodnight, Cade.’
* * *
The next morning Nicola rose at six o’clock. A peek into Ella’s room and then the boys’ room confirmed they all still slept soundly. Holly would sleep through to her usual seven o’clock, but Nicola had fully expected to find the other children wide awake and bouncing off walls.
She sneaked down to the stables to give Scarlett a Christmas carrot. Jack and several of the other stockmen and jackaroos were holding their own Christmas festivities in the stockmen’s quarters, so she left a box of old English toffee, that she’d discovered Jack had a fondness for, on the bench by his front door where he had his morning coffee. He should find it first thing.
She turned to make her way back to the homestead, but paused to drink in the early morning air. At this time of the day the light was clear and crisp. The landscape didn’t yet shimmer with its usual heat haze, and the light was easy on the eyes. It allowed her to survey, unhindered, all the natural rugged beauty of the place before the sun blazed down with its hard blinding ferocity.
The khaki-green of the mulga scrub contrasted prettily with the yellow-white of the grass...and beneath it all the red dirt of the Outback. She hadn’t expected to find so much beauty out here in the western reaches of Queensland. She hadn’t fully appreciated it when she’d first arrived. But this place and its people had helped her heal and she gave thanks that she could now see and appreciate the stark and ancient grandeur of the landscape. And that she had the best part of another month in which to enjoy it.
Christmas at Waminda Downs! An optimism she hadn’t allowed herself to feel for this day since she was a child welled in her now. She grinned and then set off at a trot for the homestead.
Entering her room via the French windows, the first thing Nicola saw was Ella sitting in the middle of her double bed. Her heart tripped. Had Ella panicked when she hadn’t been able to find her? Had she leapt to the conclusion that, just like her mother, Nicola hadn’t kept her promise and had deserted her?
‘Hey, chickadee!’ She swept her up in her arms for a hug and then plonked them both back down on the bed. ‘Merry Christmas.’
‘Merry Christmas.’ A smile warred with a frown on the child’s face.
‘I went down to the stables to wish Scarlett a merry Christmas,’ she confided.
‘I thought you were in the bathroom.’
Okay, Ella hadn’t been worried about her whereabouts, so...?
‘Excited?’ she asked.
‘What if Santa didn’t come?’ the little girl blurted out. ‘He forgot last year.’
Ah, the puzzle pieces slotted into place.
‘Did you look?’ Ella whispered. ‘Was there anything in our stockings?’
She understood it wasn’t the presents that Ella needed. It was the magic and the hope. ‘I haven’t looked yet. Do you want to go and do that now?’
Ella nodded, and while she was too big to be carried much any more, Nicola knew that the child needed the security. So she lifted her up onto her hip and started towards the living room.
Then she halted.
Ella’s bottom lip started to quiver, but Nicola winked at her. ‘You know, I think we need your daddy for this too.’ She detoured to Cade’s room and knocked on his door. A muffled sound emerged that she chose to interpret as a ‘what?’ or a ‘yes?’ rather than an oath.
‘Wake up, sleepy-head, the fun’s about to start and you don’t want to miss it.’
‘Don’t you dare start without me!’
There was a thump and a couple of bumps and a muffled curse or two and Ella giggled. ‘Daddy’s funny.’
‘Hilarious,’ he growled, flinging the door open and seizing Ella in his arms and swinging her around until she squealed.
His T-shirt was rumpled, his hair dishevelled and Nicola’s blood heated up.
‘Daddy—’ Ella clasped him tight about the neck ‘—we have to see if Santa’s been.’
Nicola shook herself, trying to dispel images that had nothing to do with Christmas and everything to do with Cade and rumpled sheets. ‘We...uh...thought you might like to join us.’
‘You were right.’
His blue eyes sent her a simple message—thank you. It turned her to mush.
Oh, grow a backbone, Nicola Ann!
She ousted her mother’s voice from her head immediately. It was Christmas. She wasn’t going to tolerate that voice today.
‘Shall I lead the way?’ she asked Ella.
Ella nodded and, without further ado, Nicola set off for the living room. She might not need a backbone, but a little steel in her legs wouldn’t have gone amiss. The presence of warm male flesh moving so closely behind her leached the strength from her limbs with each step she took.
She hummed “Jingle Bells” under her breath in an effort to ignore and counter her traitorous body’s reaction. Her newfound Christmas optimism and excitement—it left her so much more receptive to...to other things it would be wiser not to name.
She paused on the threshold of the living room, caught Ella’s eye and smiled, and then with an arm partly around the little girl and partly around the father who carried her, she swept them all into the room.
Ella’s eyes widened. They grew as large as frisbees as she stared at each of the stockings tacked to the mantelpiece, all full to bursting.
‘See, sweetie? Didn’t I tell you Santa would come?’
Ella pressed her face to Cade’s neck and promptly burst into tears.
He stared at Nicola over the top of Ella’s head, his eyes wide with panic.
Nicola shook her head and gave him a thumbs-up. ‘Excitement,’ she mouthed silently.
In no time, Ella wriggled from her father’s arms and had seized her stocking, squealing in delight as she extracted her bounty.
In less than ten minutes, the rest of the family had joined them, Verity carrying Holly. With nothing to do but to watch and enjoy, Nicola sat back and took it all in, soaked up the joy and awe of the children, the warmth and affection of the adults and the promised magic of the day.
‘You okay?’ Cade asked, plonking himself beside her on the sofa, one of his hands resting briefly on her knee.
‘Yes, of course. I...’
To her horror, she found her eyes prickling with tears. Cade’s expression sharpened in a heartbeat. He moved towards her but she shook her head, gave him a thumbs-up and mouthed ‘excitement’ to him. He grinned then and she was grateful she witnessed it through a sheen of tears or it might well have slayed her where she sat.
When she was sure she could speak without disgracing herself, she said, ‘I’ve never seen anything like this before except on the telly. I’ve never experienced this much...unadulterated joy.’
His eyes softened, those amazing blue eyes that could look as hard as the sky or as soft as a breeze, depending on their mood. ‘Nic—’
‘No, no.’ She didn’t want him feeling sorry for her. ‘It’s wonderful.’ She beamed at him. ‘I want to thank you for letting me be a part of it.’