bed, her damp hair a sexy, tangled mess, her knees bent in preparation for him. Yet when she spied the condoms in his grasp, she suddenly sat up on the edge of the mattress and lowered her eyes.
After laying the packets on the side table, he claimed the space beside her and rested a hand on her bare leg. “I realize this isn’t what you want, but under the circumstance, it’s a necessity.”
Her gaze snapped to his, the haze of desire completely gone. “Is it?”
“We still have much to discuss in regard to that issue, by your own admission.”
She pushed her hair back from her face. “Yes, you’re right, but the reminder of our impasse took me aback for a moment. I suppose I simply wanted to forget our dilemma this evening. I wish you could have held off with the condoms a bit longer.”
Frustration brought him to his feet to face her. “This wouldn’t have been a bloody issue if you’d started taking the pill again.”
“As I’ve said, I had no reason to do that when you were so bent on ignoring me.” She pinched the bridge of her nose and momentarily closed her eyes. “I am so angry.”
“At me?”
“At myself. I have walked into the same trap, succumbing to your charisma and allowing you to lead me away from our problems.”
Now he was angry. “I did nothing of the sort. We are husband and wife and we should thank our lucky stars we still want each other so fiercely after ten years of marriage.”
She let loose with a cynical laugh. “Of course you would see it that way. But sex is not a cure-all for serious marital problems.”
If she only realized that was the only way he knew how to communicate his true feelings for her. The right words had never come easily for him. Neither had acknowledging his emotions. “Why can you not be happy with what we have? Why do you see the need to change everything?”
She pulled the sheet up to cover herself. “Because we cannot be truly happy unless we fix what is broken. Only until you open up to me completely can we move past our problems.”
He knew where she was going, and he didn’t want to bloody go there. “I’ve told you more about my mother’s death than I’ve ever told another soul.”
“Yet you have not told me everything, Sebastian. Aside from your father’s careless disregard and your guilt over your last moments with your mother, there is something else keeping you from committing to fatherhood.”
He clenched his jaw against the litany of curses threatening to spill out. “You have no idea what I went through.”
She stood and leveled her gaze on him. “Then tell me all of it. Make me understand.”
He didn’t dare. “I am going to take a shower.”
He turned to retire to the bath, only to have her call him back. “When will you stop running away, Sebastian?” she asked. “When it is too late for us?”
The words impaled him like a knife to his heart. “You’re asking too much of me tonight, Sira. If it’s too difficult for you to be intimate with me, then by all means, retire to your blessed bed and I’ll stay in mine alone. If you happen to change your mind, then it will be up to you to come to me. In the meantime, I’ll not bother you again.”
And this time, he vowed to stay true to his word.
* * *
He had not spoken to her for two days. In fact, Nasira had barely seen her husband except in passing. He had spent much of his time in his quarters, sequestered away with his laptop.
Today that would come to an end, if she had any say in the matter. She had given him a wide berth to think about what she had said, but they had come to a crossroads. His time was up.
She opened the door to his bedroom without knocking, only to find him packing. A blinding fear overcame her, then resignation that perhaps she had pushed him too hard.
He afforded her only a glance while he placed a suit in the garment bag without speaking.
“Are you returning to London?” she asked, expecting an affirmative answer.
“No. I’m going to Dallas,” he said, shattering her expectations, and filling her with relief.
She moved closer to the bed, but not too close. “Why Dallas?”
He dropped a few toiletries into a small carry-on bag. “I’ve managed to secure an invitation to an importers conference.”
She folded her arms around her middle. “How long do you intend to be gone?”
He zipped the case and placed it on a bench at the end of the footboard. “I’ll return tomorrow afternoon.”
“Did it occur to you to invite me along?”
He sent her a sideways glance. “You’d be bored.”
“I have attended these functions with you before.”
He zipped the garment bag and turned. “Yes, you have, but that was before I knew you considered me a closed-off bastard who runs at the first sign of trouble.”
“You ran from me the other night. You ran after I lost the baby.”
He dropped onto the edge of the mattress and forked his hands through his hair. “Perhaps you’re right.”
It was an admission she thought she would never hear. She sat down beside him on the bed. “I am not willing to give up on us yet, Sebastian. I would like to accompany you on this trip and we will go from there.”
“Well, I’ve always enjoyed having a beautiful wife at my side.”
That ruffled her feminine feathers. “I do not want to go as your arm ornament. I want to be there as your equal. You have never viewed me as that.”
He appeared extremely confused. “Where is this coming from?”
“Well, if we want to sincerely work on our marriage, then I think it’s best to be honest. Many times I have asked about the company, and you brushed me off.”
“I never thought you were interested in that part of my life.”
“It should be part of my life as well. After all, my father was just as immersed in the shipping world. I might not have finished my degree, but I observed all aspects of the operation. I possibly know as much about it as you do.”
Now Sebastian looked skeptical. “You mean that riveting world of routes, imports and exports, and shipping containers?”
“Yes, and the importance of making connections. I am quite capable of doing that. In fact, I’ll wager I will make at least two this evening if I go with you.”
“I’ve always enjoyed a good wager. And if you succeed, I will give you whatever you desire.”
“Anything?”
“Within reason.”
That probably eliminated her request for a child. “And if I do not succeed?”
“I will only ask that you be patient with me. I’m not good at all this sharing-my-feelings rubbish.”
An odd facet of their relationship suddenly struck Nasira. “Do you realize that up until six months ago, we rarely ever argued?”
He seemed to mull that over for a minute. “You are absolutely right. Perhaps that is because you are perfect.”
He sounded strangely sincere. “Of course that is a fallacy.”
“Not to me.”
“Sebastian, I know I have some habits that must drive you batty.”
He rubbed his chin. “It is rather disconcerting when you rearrange my bureau drawers.”
“Guilty