the time they touched down in England she’d accepted that this was what she’d have to do.
She felt utterly miserable and when he put her into a separate car at the airport and didn’t even say whether he would see her again, Lucinda felt like breaking down in tears. Of course she didn’t; she lifted her chin and pretended that she wasn’t hurt.
It could be that he was worried about his little nephew’s grandmother, but somehow she didn’t think so. It was something she had said or done. Perhaps he’d been afraid that she was the clinging type, that she wouldn’t want to let go? Which was ridiculous, because she’d known from the beginning that there was no future in their relationship. Even if that really was the case, he needn’t have cut her out of his life quite so abruptly.
During the next few days Lucinda threw herself into her work. There was a lot to catch up on and she pushed Zane Alexander to the back of her mind. Or at least she tried to. It was practically impossible, especially when she lay alone in her bed at night. They’d had so many nights of passion that it killed her. She wanted Zane with her for ever more.
Then her secretary put a call through. ‘It’s Mr Alexander,’ she declared in a hushed voice.
Lucinda was aware that Amanda had been curious about her visit to the Caribbean, but she’d kept deliberately quiet, saying only that the project hadn’t materialised, not wanting to tell anyone what had happened. She hadn’t even told her mother, even though Ruth had questioned her time and time again.
Now her heart raced erratically. ‘Lucinda Oliver,’ she announced, keeping her tone brisk and businesslike. ‘How may I help you?’
‘Lucinda.’
It was his voice that did it. That incredible growl that made her toes curl and her stomach turn over. She closed her eyes and attempted to hold on to her dignity.
‘I need to see you.’
Heavens! Was he talking about what she hoped he was talking about? Had he, like her, spent sleepless nights wishing they were together again? Had he realised that he couldn’t live without her? That what they had was something special, far removed from a brief affair? Her heartbeats were loud and heavy in her breast and she put a hand to her throat.
‘I need you to help me look after Timothy.’
Lucinda’s spirits fell like a sledgehammer, slamming into her senses, making her realise how stupid she had been. Of course he wouldn’t want her for any other reason; he had made that perfectly clear. She had been stupid to even think it. ‘Why?’ she asked, hoping he couldn’t hear the sudden dryness in her throat. ‘Why me?’
‘Because he knows you, he likes you.’
‘I’m not a nanny any longer,’ she reminded him curtly, swallowing her disappointment. Lord knew what she had thought he would say but it certainly hadn’t been anything like that. ‘Besides, how can he remember me when it was so long ago?’
A brief silence, then, ‘You’re someone I know and can trust.’
Lucinda shook her head. He sounded brisk and businesslike, not a man whose bed she had shared night after night. ‘I’m very busy, Zane. I have a lot to catch up on.’
‘Tim’s grandmother’s very poorly. The poor boy has no one but me to look after him.’
‘And you’re naturally too busy.’ Lucinda couldn’t keep the sarcasm out of her voice. ‘And you also have a nerve thinking I’ll drop everything to do your work for you.’
‘I’m missing you, Lucinda.’ It was said quietly, almost regretfully, and she was aware how much it must have cost him to say that. She couldn’t curb a tiny smile. So he wasn’t entirely immune to her? Their brief affair had meant something! Quite what she couldn’t be sure, but it meant that he was possibly suffering the same as she was. Except that she loved him and his feelings were nothing more than lust.
Nevertheless, the thought of seeing him again was extremely tempting.
‘I could set you up an office here so that you won’t get behind with your work.’ And when she didn’t answer he added, ‘Whatever you need will be yours.’
I need you, she thought desperately. I need your love. Not an office. Not looking after your nephew. You! Would this be second best? If she moved into his house, would their affair rekindle itself? Would Zane realise what he was missing? Would he learn to love her the same as she loved him?
Lucinda found it hard to believe that she had fallen in love with Zane after vowing to herself never to trust another man. It just went to show that when the right man came along…
Was Zane the right man? She wouldn’t know unless she took up his challenge. It was the only chance she’d have of seeing him again.
‘Lucinda? Give me your answer.’
She threw her shoulders back, drew in a deep breath and said, ‘I don’t see why I should, but, yes, I suppose I will. Until you sort yourself out at least.’ Whether she’d regret it later she didn’t know, but for the moment she was being given a second chance and she knew that it was something she had to do.
She heard the soft whistle of his breath, knew that he’d been holding it while he waited for her answer. ‘Thank you, Lucinda. I’ll make sure you never regret it. I’ll send a car for you now.’
‘Oh, no, you won’t!’ declared Lucinda vehemently. ‘I have a day’s work to finish. Then I need to go home and pack. I’ll start in the morning.’
‘But—’
‘But nothing, Zane! I’ll come in the morning or not at all.’ And she put down the phone, guessing that he had never had anyone do that to him before. But she didn’t care. He couldn’t walk all over her; she wouldn’t let him. And even now, only seconds after agreeing to help him out, she was having doubts. Would she be making a fool of herself? Was it really only for Tim’s sake that he needed her? Nothing to do with his own feelings! Or was she walking into a trap? He wanted her to mind Tim, yes, but that could be an excuse because he also wanted her body.
For the rest of the day Lucinda found it difficult to concentrate and when she went home that evening and told her mother what she was doing Ruth was delighted. ‘Forget the nanny stuff,’ she declared. ‘He’s missing you. This is fantastic, Lucinda. He’s quite a catch.’
‘I’m not interested in his money, Mother, you know that.’
Ruth shrugged. ‘Whatever. I know he has a reputation, but I think he’s finally been hooked. I knew when you came back from St Lucia that something had happened between you; I could see it in your eyes. I’m happy for you, darling.’
Lucinda didn’t feel happy. She felt worried. And excited! It was an odd mixture of feelings—apprehension laced with anticipation.
When the car came to pick her up she was still feeling unsure. She’d had an almost sleepless night worrying whether she was doing the right thing. It was her heart leading her, not her head, and she feared that she might be on course for disaster. Nevertheless she had to go through with it. Some demon inside drove her on.
The last time she’d been here, recalled Lucinda as the car proceeded along a winding drive lined with plane trees, was when Tim was two. Zane had said that his nephew remembered her but Lucinda wasn’t so sure. Three years was a long time for a child. She had a feeling that Zane had used that as an excuse.
But when they got to the house—a huge red brick building with formal lawns at the front and a swimming pool at the back—she remembered the pool because she had always been fearful that Tim might wander out there and drown—the door opened and Timothy himself stood shyly on the step. She caught sight of an older woman in the background.
How he had grown! She hurried towards him and gave him a big hug. ‘I’ve missed you,’ she said with a warm smile. ‘What a big boy you are now.’
He smiled at her then. ‘I