more carriage visitors. I have nothing at all to say against you, ma'am, or the place; but I want to better myself by seeing a little of 'igh life."
Lady.—"Then if you have no other reason for wanting to go, James, I fear we shall have to part, as I certainly can't arrange to receive carriage visitors simply for your benefit." (Sinks languidly back on the couch and resumes her book. James retires.)
Lady (to herself).—"How tiresome these servants are, to be sure, now I shall have the trouble of engaging a new footman. I really think no one with my delicate health had ever so much to do before." (Rises and retires.)
Scene 2.—Bringing in the word Bang.
Old gentleman sitting in an arm-chair, a table by his side, on which medicine bottles and a gruel basin are placed, and his leg, thickly bandaged, resting on a chair.
Old Gent.—"Oh, this horrid pain! what shall I do? will no one come to help me? That stupid doctor has done me no good."
Enter Maid-servant.—"Please, sir, the doctor has come. Shall I tell him to come upstairs?"
Old Gent.—"Of course you must, and unless he is quick I shall die before he gets here. Oh dear! Oh dear!" (Exit maid, banging the door after her.)
Old Gent (shrieking out with pain).—"Oh, you cruel creature, how can you bang the door in that way, when even the slightest footstep on the floor is enough to make me wild? Quick, doctor, quick!" (Here the maid again appears, holding the door open for the doctor.)
Doctor (with a large case of instruments under his arm).—"Mr. Grumbleton, you appear to be very ill; can I do anything to relieve you? Let me feel your pulse."
Old Gent.—"Oh, my leg!"
Doctor.—"Your nerves are in a very excited state; you must have perfect quiet." (Here the street door is heard to bang loudly, making the house shake.)
Old Gent.—"Keep quiet, do you say! You might as well tell me to cut my leg off. There is no such thing as quiet in this house. That little good-for-nothing of a maid never comes into the room without shutting the door with a bang."
Doctor.—"Be calm, my dear friend, and I will order you a soothing mixture, and as I leave the house I will insist upon perfect quiet being maintained." (Then rebandaging the gentleman's leg, and placing him comfortably in the arm-chair, the doctor retires.)
Scene 3.—Bringing in the whole word, Go-bang.
Inside a coffee-room. Two or three friends are seated with their coffee and pipes, when one, who has just returned from foreign lands, begins relating some of his adventures.
Smith.—"Yes, my boys, glad as I am to get back to my own country, I should not like to be without the remembrance of all that I have witnessed in the far-off lands I have been visiting."
Brown.—"Yes, friend, you must have had a brave heart to face the thousand dangers to which no doubt you have been exposed. But though it's getting late, we must, before parting, hear one of your adventures. So proceed, comrade."
Smith.—"Well, it's not worth while beginning a long tale when there's not time to finish it, so I'll just sketch the sort of risk one often runs in the wilds of the backwoods. My mates and I had been out one day on a hunting expedition, when, returning home late at night, I unfortunately got left behind. The darkness was so great that my absence was not noticed, and before very long I found I had taken the wrong track. I came to this conclusion because I heard nothing but the tramp of my own horse's hoofs, when suddenly I felt that danger was at hand. Almost before I could put my thoughts into words, I felt something go bang close past my ear; then three Indians rushed upon me. Instead of feeling fear, a kind of supernatural strength took possession of me. I lifted my pistol and shot the man nearest to me, the next I felled; when, strange to say, the third man just at this moment turned round and fled. I suppose he heard the voices and footsteps of my friends, who were, at last, coming in search of me. At any rate he disappeared, when we all made the best of our way home, truly thankful that my life had been spared."
Jones.—"Well done, Smith! Next time we meet you must tell us of the many escapes you have had, and wonderful scenes you have witnessed in foreign parts."
The following, among other words, are suitable for charade acting:—
Adulation, Andrew, Arrowroot, Artichoke, Articulate; Bayonet, Bellman, Bondmaid, Bonfire, Bookworm, Bracelet, Bridewell, Brimstone, Brushwood; Cabin, Carpet, Castaway, Catacomb, Champaign, Chaplain, Checkmate, Childhood, Cowslip, Cupboard, Cutlet; Daybreak, Dovetail, Downfall, Dustman; Earrings, Earshot, Exciseman; Farewell, Footman; Grandchild; Harebell, Handiwork, Handsome, Hardship, Helpless, Highgate, Highwayman, Homesick, Hornbook; Illwill, Indigent, Indulgent, Inmate, Insight, Intent, Intimate; Jewel, Jonquil, Joyful; Kindred, Kneedeep; Label, Lawful, Leapyear, Lifelike, Loophole, Loveknot; Madcap, Matchless, Milkmaid, Mistake, Misunderstand, Mohair, Moment, Moonstruck; Namesake, Necklace, Nightmare, Nightshade, Ninepin, Nutmeg; Orphanage, Outside, Oxeye; Padlock, Painful, Parsonage, Penmanship, Pilgrim, Pilot, Pinchbeck, Purchase; Quarto, Quicklime, Quicksand, Quickset, Quicksilver; Ragamuffin, Ringleader, Roundhead, Ruthful; Scarlet, Season, Sentinel, Sightless, Skipjack, Sluggard, Sofa, Solo, Somebody, Sonnet, Sparerib, Sparkling, Spectacle, Speculate, Speedwell, Spinster, Starling, Statement, Stucco, Supplicate, Sweetmeat, Sweetheart; Tactic, Tartar, Tenant, Tendon, Tenor, Threshold, Ticktack, Tiresome, Toadstool, Token, Torment, Tractable, Triplet, Tunnel; Upright, Uproar; Vampire, Vanguard; Waistcoat, Watchful, Watchman, Waterfall, Wayward, Wedding, Wedlock, Welcome, Welfare, Wilful, Willow, Workmanship; Yokemate, Youthful.
CLAIRVOYANT.
In this game one of the company standing outside the room is, strange to say, able to describe what is passing inside. A dialogue such as would have to be carried on between the principal players will best describe the game, and show how it is to be played:—
"Do you quite remember how the room is furnished in which we are sitting?"
"I do."
"Do you remember the colour of the chairs?"
"I do."
"Do you know the ornaments on the mantelpiece?"
"I do."
"And the vase of flowers?"
"I do."
"The old china in the cabinet?"
"Yes."
"The stuffed birds?"
"Yes."
"You think there is nothing in the room that has escaped your notice?"
"Nothing."
"Then please tell me which article I am now touching."
"You are touching the vase of flowers."
The vase of flowers being the only object preceded by the word and, the clairvoyant knows that that is the object which will be touched. The fun of the game, of course, consists in puzzling those of the company to whom the secret is unknown.
THE COMIC CONCERT.
In this performance the company for the time imagine themselves to be a band of musicians. The leader of the band is supposed to furnish each of the performers with a different musical instrument. Consequently, a violin, a harp, a flute, an accordion, a piano,