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Английский разговорный шутя. 100 анекдотов на все случаи жизни


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in the blanks with the words from the text:

      1. Two newlyweds _______ their honeymoon.

      2. His toes were _______ twisted and discolored.

      3. What _______ to your feet?

      4. I had a _______ disease called tolio.

      5. It only _______ the toes.

      6. He _______ his pants and _______ a pair of knees.

      3. Match the two parts of the sentences:

      4. Match the words and expressions in the left column to those in the right one:

      5. Translate from Russian into English:

      1. Он снял ботинки и носки.

      2. Что случилось с пальцами твоих ног?

      3. У меня была детская болезнь – корь.

      4. Он обнажил ужасно выглядящую пару коленок.

      5. Она оказывает воздействие только на колени.

      6. Его жена открыла рот от удивления и сказала: «Не говори мне, что у тебя еще была и оспа».

Revise English Grammar

      В предложении His toes were all twisted and discolored… используются глаголы в форме пассивного залога.

      Проверьте свое знание данной формы, при необходимости справляясь в грамматическом комментарии (раздел 14).

      6. Put the verbs in brackets into Passive:

      1. Two newlyweds (to invite) _______ to their friend's house to spend the honeymoon there last year.

      2. Just you wait! The shoes (to take off) _______ in a moment.

      3. The socks (to dry) _______ at present.

      4. My toes (to twist) _______ because of the disease I had in childhood.

      5. At last the pants (to remove) _______.

      6. His knees definitely (to affect) _______ by polio.

      7. Transform the Direct Speech into Indirect:

      1. His wife asked, «What happened to your feet?»

      2. He said to her, «I had a childhood disease called tolio.»

      3. She said, «Do you mean polio?»

      4. She asked, «What happened to your knees?»

      5. He said, «I also had kneesles.»

      6. She said, «Are you having anything now?»

      7. He said, «It only affects the knees.»

      8. She asked, «Don't tell me, you also had smallcox!»

      8. Find English equivalents to the Russian words in the scanword:

      1. (t…) палец ноги, 2. (d…) болезнь, 3. (r…) снимать, удалять, 4. (r…) открывать, 5. (а…) изумление, 6. (h…) здоровый, 7. (w…) бороться, 8. (g…) стонать, 9. (b…) невеста, 10. (а…) ужасный.

      9. Render the joke.

      Section 13

      A couple at the zoo

      It's a beautiful warm spring day and a man and his wife are visiting the local zoo. She's wearing a cute, loose-fitting, pink spring dress, sleeveless, with straps.

      As they walk through the ape exhibit and pass in front of a very large gorilla, the gorilla begins to go ape. He jumps up on the bars, holding on with one hand (and two feet), grunts, and pounds his chest with his free hand. The gorilla is obviously excited at seeing the pretty lady in the pink dress.

      The husband, noticing the excitement, suggests that his wife tease the poor fellow by puckering her lips, wiggling her bottom… play along.

      She does, and Mr Gorilla gets even more excited, making noises that would wake the dead. Then the husband suggests that she let one of her straps fall.

      She does, and Mr Gorilla is just about to tear the bars down! The husband then suggests that she try lifting her dress up her thighs. This drives the poor gorilla absolutely crazy.

      Then quickly the husband grabs his wife, rips open the door to the cage, flings her in with the gorilla and says, «Now tell HIM you have a headache.»

      Study the words and expressions given below:

      to wear носить (одежду)

      cute милый, славный

      loose свободный

      to fit подходить по размеру (об одежде)

      loose-fitting свободного покроя

      pink розовый

      sleeveless без рукавов

      strap тесьма, лямка

      аре обезьяна

      exhibit выставка, экспозиция

      аре exhibit обезьянник

      gorilla горилла

      bars решетка

      to grunt ворчать, сердиться

      to pound колотить

      chest грудь; грудная клетка

      obviously очевидно

      to notice замечать

      excitement возбуждение

      to suggest предлагать

      to tease дразнить

      poor бедный

      fellow парень

      to pucker морщить (губы), складывать (губы) в гримаску

      to lift поднимать

      thigh бедро

      to drive двигать, понуждать

      crazy сумасшедший, чокнутый

      to grab хватать, захватывать

      to