Planning A Wedding For Dummies. Sarah Lizabeth Barker

Flower Girl(s) Ring Bearer(s) Mother of the Bride Father of the Bride Mother of the Groom Father of the Groom Ushers Guestbook/Program Attendant(s)

      Standing by your side

      Now that you have picked your bridal party, it’s time to figure out where everyone is going to stand and sit during your ceremony. In Chapter 12, when we create your ceremony, we’ll talk about how your bridal party processes or enters and recesses or exits the ceremony. For now, we’re going to work through the order of your bridesmaids and groomsmen and discuss where the parents sit during the ceremony.

I have a fun assignment for you to do together. Actually, because it’s fun, let’s call it a team-building opportunity. In Table 2-2, write the name of your bridesmaids and groomsmen in order, and then parents and grandparents. A few things to note when you do this:

       Where you see “Bride” and “Groom,” that’s you.

       Make it your own. The chart can say “Bride” and “Bride” or “Groom” and “Groom.” But the “bride” is always on the left.

       Imagine standing at the front of the church. As you go down the chart, write in the names closest to you. The maid/matron of honor will be first, followed by the bridesmaids. Same thing for the groom’s side; the best man will be first followed by the groomsmen.

       Fill in the names of your parents and grandparents. They will not be standing at the altar with you, but this will help you visualize which side of the ceremony seating they will be on.

      

Now for the fun part. As you fill in the chart, figure out together who would make the perfect pair. If you have married couples in your bridal party, keep them together. If you have couples who used to date, keep them apart. No one wants that drama!

TABLE 2-2 Your Bridal Party Order

Bride’s Side	Groom’s Side
Maid of Honor/Matron of Honor	Best Man/Men
Bridesmaids	Groomsmen
Bride’s Parents	Groom’s Parents
Bride’s Grandparents	Groom’s Grandparents

Having an uneven number of bridesmaids and groomsmen is okay. Depending on where the numbers fall, if you have more groomsmen than bridesmaids, two groomsmen will walk with one bridesmaid. If you have more bridesmaids than groomsmen, two bridesmaids will walk with one groomsman. Do not stress about that! You both have different family and friends. It’s fine if they don’t line up perfectly.

      

If you are not doing “sides,” I still want you to fill in this chart because these are the people who get assigned seats at the ceremony. Additional family and guests can sit on whichever side they’d like. The reason we do this with the specific people in the chart is so that your immediate family will be seated on your side.

      Proposing to your bridal party

      I love to see how my clients propose to their bridal party. Asking your bridal party to be in your wedding is a long-standing tradition, but now we “propose” to our bridal party. When I started my career as a wedding planner, clients would just ask their bridal party, “Hey, want to be in my wedding?” Now we have elaborate ways to ask them and if you’re into it, let’s explore some fun ideas. I’ll also discuss the good old-fashioned way to ask them to be a part of your big day.

      These are special people to you and whether you want to go all out or keep it simple, they deserve to feel special. They have obviously influenced your life in a positive way, so in this section, we’re going to talk about some ways you can honor them and ask them to be on your squad. Most importantly, you need to make sure they are available on the big day!

       Special dinner. If all of your bridal party is in one location, plan a special night out where all of you — including spouses or dates — go out to dinner at a local hot spot. Thank them for being so special to you and ask them at dinner to be in your wedding. Of course, it’s unlikely that everyone lives in the city where you live, so individual dinners held as you can are fun too!

       Phone