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Confessions of a Lapdancer


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I played up to it. It’s so easy to manipulate some guys.’

      I stared at her in disbelief. ‘Tania, why are you telling me this? I had to work damn hard to get where I am and to earn respect in this team and you come along and tell me I could have got there quicker by wearing a short skirt?’

      ‘No, that’s not what I meant …’

      ‘Tania, please, just leave me alone.’

      I left her at the bar and took refuge in the ladies’ loo. Just like the women in the club, she flaunted herself effortlessly and that just wasn’t my style. Tania Peck was a man’s woman. I suppose my style could be summed up as look but don’t touch.

      She revealed; I concealed. It was as simple as that.

      I couldn’t delay my reappearance any longer, so took a deep breath and rejoined the party. My timing was poor. Luke was busy enjoying his lap dance, which he’d chosen to have in public rather than in the private booth.

      It seemed to me he was getting into it a little too much as I could see him groping the dancer and it didn’t take a genius to work out this was a breach of club rules.

      Out of the corner of my eye I saw a couple of giant figures approaching, but before they could reach him, Tania strode over, shooed away the dancer without a word and straddled Luke, fully clothed.

      Her pneumatic frame came into its own, arching, twisting and circling over him as she ran her hands through his blond hair but moved out of reach every time he tried to grab her.

      The security staff soon backed off as the mood lightened and the other guys started laughing and wolf-whistling.

      But when she turned round to grind her bottom inches from his face, Luke ran his hands up under her skirt and grabbed both cheeks before slapping them.

      ‘Bad baby,’ he said. ‘I’ll tell you in future when I want you to dance for me. I don’t want these guys getting an eyeful of what’s mine.’

      Tania ignored him and carried on gyrating until the end of the next track, to Luke’s obvious discomfort. Then she dismounted and snatched the £50 note Luke had in his hand to place in the pro-dancer’s garter.

      ‘Thanks, Lukey baby,’ she announced, ‘that will pay for my cab home – alone!’

      Luke’s face was a picture and the Brothers were rolling in the aisles, which riled him no end. It was so good to see him being played by a girl.

      ‘Bravo, Tania,’ I clapped.

      Luke saw me laughing and turned on me like a wounded beast. ‘That turn you on, Geri Boy? Maybe you’re more of a man than we thought!’

      He clicked his fingers to summon one of the dancers – a pale honey-blonde wearing a tight red bikini top and short denim skirt.

      ‘OK, I’ll pay you £50 to do a private dance for my colleague here,’ he said to her, pointing to me, ‘and £50 more if you snog her afterwards, full tongues.’

      ‘We don’t kiss the customers, sir,’ she replied. ‘And we can’t dance for a customer who doesn’t give consent.’

      ‘Jesus, you girls are no fun,’ he said, his face dropping. ‘How about you, Tania, why don’t you dance for your boss? That would be a great way of getting to know each other, don’t you think?’

      ‘Leave Tania out of this,’ I said, pulling Luke over to one side. ‘I don’t know if you’re on some kind of bet to see how far you can wind me up, Luke, but you won’t break me.’

      ‘What makes you think I’m trying to break you? I’m just trying to have a little fun here. Women like you are all the same. You’re so bloody obsessed with success that it turns you into hard-faced old boots.’

      ‘I’ve had just about enough of your shit for one day,’ I said. ‘You’ve been on my case since the moment I met you and I will not tolerate you talking to me like this, especially in front of our boss.’

      ‘Oh Christ, Carson,’ he said. ‘You don’t get it, do you? If you can’t stand the heat, get out of the kitchen. And by the way, I wouldn’t fancy you if you were the last chick on the planet, you’re so bloody uptight …’

      ‘Fuck off, Cotterill, you know nothing about me, who I am or what I’m capable of. Just get out of my face.’

      Daryll saw what was happening, from where he was standing with some of the Brothers, but did nothing. I could only conclude that Luke’s juvenile behaviour had been condoned by the boys’ club, as if they were putting me through some perverse kind of jousting competition to see who would be knocked off their horse first. It was all in a day’s sport for them.

      I had to do something that would completely floor Luke. What would wipe the smug smile off his face, short of punching him?

      Suddenly I knew instinctively what to do. I strode over to Ryan, beckoning him with my index finger. He looked around, hesitating and waiting for their approval. However, he knew what side his bread – and his bed – was buttered on, so he followed me over to the dance area.

      I slowly unbuckled my jacket, peeling it off and easing my black polo neck jumper over my head, revealing a skimpy black camisole over a black lace balconette bra.

      Blinking under the harsh spotlight, I felt utterly exposed but I had to brazen it out. Luke had successfully upped the stakes and was standing with his arms crossed, waiting to see what I would do next. Would I stand or would I fall? There was no turning back now …

      Chapter Three

      It was time for me to put up or shut up so, in full view of my team, I bent over and unzipped my black spike-heeled boots, taking them off in as teasing a fashion as I could manage, dangling them in one hand before I let them drop to the floor.

      Luke and Daryll seemed mesmerised by my breasts, as if they had convinced themselves I didn’t actually have any. To be fair to them, I’d always tried my hardest to cover them up in the office.

      Ryan, of course, had been allowed to enjoy them intimately on more than one occasion so he was looking very pleased with himself, as if he’d suddenly been promoted to leader of the pack.

      I took a deep breath, kept my eyes on him as I carefully stepped backwards on to a podium and wrapped myself around the cold steel of the pole. First I slid my spine up and down, splaying my knees into a squatting position, before pulling myself up with my hands above my head, sashaying my hips side to side at the same time.

      Remembering the dance I’d seen earlier, I hooked one leg around the pole and twisted around until I reached the floor. Just at that moment, ‘Raspberry Beret’, one of my favourite Prince tracks, started playing.

      ‘Right,’ I thought. ‘I’ll show you uptight.’

      By this point I could see the bulge in Ryan’s trousers, and the boys in the team whooping and cheering me on behind him.

      I licked my lips as I swivelled around the pole, feeling damn grateful that I’d spent so much time on Zeus, not to mention the countless hours in the gym.

      I was confident enough in my fitness and the strength of my biceps and thighs to try some of the more ambitious moves I’d seen that night, so I thought, here goes nothing, grabbed the pole at eye level and swung myself upside down, making a V-shape with my legs.

      It required a lot of concentration to maintain a degree of gracefulness and sensuality; I had to make it look easy, even if it wasn’t – but then I was used to doing that every day at the office.

      When I looked up, Ryan was salivating and even Luke was looking vaguely impressed.

      Adrenalin was pumping through my body, partly with the effort, partly with the sheer thrill of dancing in such an erotic way. I loved the feeling of power it gave me, especially seeing the effect I was having on Ryan and his idiotic pals.

      Their eyes were