Arthur Sullivan

The Complete Plays of Gilbert and Sullivan


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hours!

       Would anybody else like to marry me? You, ma'am—or

       you—anybody! I'm getting used to it!

       BARONESS. But let me tell you, ma'am—

       JULIA. Why, you impudent little hussy—

       LISA. Oh, here's another—here's another! (Weeping.)

       PRINCESS. Poor ladies, I'm very sorry for you all; but,

       you

       see, I've a prior claim. Come, away we go—there's not a moment

       to be lost!

       CHORUS (as they dance towards exit).

       Away to the wedding we'll go

       To summon the charioteers,

       No kind of reluctance we show

       To embark on our married careers—

       (At this moment RUDOLPH, ERNEST, and NOTARY appear.

       All kneel in astonishment.)

       RECITATIVE.

       RUD., Ern., and NOT.

       Forbear! This may not be!

       Frustrated are your plans!

       With paramount decree

       The Law forbids the banns!

       ALL. The Law forbids the banns!

       LUD. Not a bit of it! I've revived the law for another

       century!

       RUD. You didn't revive it! You couldn't revive it!

       You—you are an impostor, sir—a tuppenny rogue, sir! You—you

       never were, and in all human probability never will be—Grand

       Duke of Pfennig Anything!

       ALL. What!!!

       RUD. Never—never, never! (Aside.) Oh, my internal

       economy!

       LUD. That's absurd, you know. I fought the Grand Duke.

       He

       drew a King, and I drew an Ace. He perished in inconceivable

       agonies on the spot. Now, as that's settled, we'll go on with

       the wedding.

       RUD. It—it isn't settled. You—you can't. I—I—(to

       NOTARY). Oh, tell him—tell him! I can't!

       NOT. Well, the fact is, there's been a little mistake

       here.

       On reference to the Act that regulates Statutory Duels, I find it

       is expressly laid down that the Ace shall count invariably as

       lowest!

       ALL. As lowest!

       RUD. (breathlessly). As lowest—lowest—lowest! So

       you're

       the ghoest—ghoest—ghoest! (Aside.) Oh, what is the matter

       with me inside here!

       ERN. Well, Julia, as it seems that the law hasn't been

       revived—and as, consequently, I shall come to life in about

       three minutes—(consulting his watch)—

       JULIA. My objection falls to the ground. (Resignedly.)

       Very well!

       PRINCESS. And am I to understand that I was on the point

       of

       marrying a dead man without knowing it? (To RUDOLPH, who

       revives.) Oh, my love, what a narrow escape I've had!

       RUD. Oh—you are the Princess of Monte Carlo, and you've

       turned up just in time! Well, you're an attractive little girl,

       you know, but you're as poor as a rat! (They retire up

       together.)

       LISA. That's all very well, but what is to become of me?

       (To LUDWIG.) If you're a dead man—(Clock strikes three.)

       LUD. But I'm not. Time's up—the Act has expired—I've

       come

       to life—the parson is still in attendance, and we'll all be

       married directly.

       ALL. Hurrah!

       FINALE.

      Happy couples, lightly treading,

       Castle chapel will be quite full!

       Each shall have a pretty wedding,

       As, of course, is only rightful,

       Though the brides be fair or frightful.

       Contradiction little dreading,

       This will be a day delightful—

       Each shall have a pretty wedding!

       Such a pretty, pretty wedding!

       Such a pretty wedding!

       (All dance off to get married as the curtain falls.)

      THE END

       Table of Contents

      OR, THE LASS THAT LOVED A SAILOR

       Libretto by William S. Gilbert

       Music by Sir Arthur Sullivan

      DRAMATIS PERSONAE

       THE RT.HON SIR JOSEPH PORTER, K.C.B. (First Lord of the Admiralty).

       CAPTAIN CORCORAN (Commanding H.M.S. Pinafore).

       TOM TUCKER (Midshipmite).

       RALPH RAKESTRAW (Able Seaman).

       DICK DEADEYE (Able Seaman).

       BILL BOBSTAY (Boatswain's Mate).

       BOB BECKET (Carpenter's Mate).

       JOSEPHINE (the Captain's Daughter).

       HEBE (Sir Joseph Porter's First Cousin).

       MRS. CRIPPS (LITTLE BUTTERCUP) (A Portsmouth Bumboat Woman).

       First Lord's Sisters, his Cousins, his Aunts, Sailors, Marines, etc.

       Scene: QUARTER-DECK OF H.M.S. PINAFORE, OFF PORTSMOUTH

       ACT I.—Noon. ACT II.—Night

       First produced at the Opera Comique on May 25, 1878.

       Table of Contents

      SCENE—Quarter-deck of H.M.S. Pinafore. Sailors, led by BOATSWAIN,

       discovered cleaning brasswork, splicing rope, etc.

       CHORUS

       We sail the ocean blue,

       And our saucy ship's a beauty;

       We're sober men and true,

       And attentive to our duty.

       When the balls whistle free

       O'er the bright blue sea,

       We stand to our guns all day;

       When at anchor we ride

       On the Portsmouth tide,

       We have plenty of time to play.

       Enter LITTLE BUTTERCUP, with large basket on her arm