a little, Alyssa huddled in her coat, remembering how cold she’d been the afternoon she’d fallen into Lake Michigan. At times like this the cold seemed to seep into her bones, making her wonder if she’d ever be warm again.
She’d always been warm in Jadon’s arms, she thought with a sigh, putting her head back and closing her eyes.
Somewhere along the route home she fell asleep. When Jadon gently shook her, she lifted her heavy eyelids, blinking against the bright snow. “Where are we?”
“My house. Don’t argue. Two cars were sitting sideways in the road leading to your apartment complex because the hill was too slick for them to make it up, so I came here instead.”
She let out a heavy breath. “I don’t want to argue, but I hate to cause trouble,” she said weakly.
He sent her a narrow glare. “Don’t be silly. You’re no trouble, Alyssa. At least here I can keep an eye on you.”
An eye on her for what? Because she needed a caretaker? At least before they’d been equal partners in their intimacy. Now he was treating her more like a responsibility.
She didn’t like it. She wanted to mean more.
“Wait for me. The driveway is very icy.”
Since she couldn’t lever herself out of the car without help anyway, she waited. Jadon tugged her out of the car, and then wrapped his arm around her waist, supporting her as they gingerly made their way across the slick, snowy sidewalk up to the house.
This close to him, his familiar musky scent filled her head, bringing back memories of the nights they’d spent together. Did he think about those times at all?
She glanced up at him as he unlocked the door, irrationally wishing she could force him to remember. Large, fluffy snowflakes covered his dark hair, clinging to his eyelashes. For a moment their gazes locked and she could tell their closeness affected him, too. But then he stepped back, helping to take her coat off as if she couldn’t perform the simple task herself. And suddenly she wanted to prove she wasn’t weak or helpless.
“Jadon.” He froze when she placed a hand on the middle of his chest. His eyes darkened and his heart beat erratically beneath her fingertips and she knew she finally had his full attention. Keeping her gaze locked on his, she gripped his shirt, lifted herself up on her toes and pressed her mouth against his.
Stunned, Jadon couldn’t move, absorbing the heady taste of her kiss. The intense heat that simmered beneath the surface didn’t take long to ignite and within moments he’d clutched her close, her round belly pressed intimately against him as he deepened the kiss.
She tasted so sweet, he couldn’t get enough. How long had it been since he’d touched her? Held her? It seemed like forever.
“Jadon,” she whispered on a moan, and suddenly he realized what he was doing. This couldn’t happen. He broke off the kiss, breathing heavily.
“I’m sorry,” he muttered, trying to regain his equilibrium. “I shouldn’t have done that.”
Alyssa stared at him with an oddly hurt expression. “I’m the one who kissed you.”
She had, and he wasn’t sure why. Unless she was under the delusion they could simply pick up where they’d left off before? Impossible.
“I shouldn’t have let things get out of control. This wasn’t why I brought you here.”
“No. I’m sure it wasn’t.” She turned away, leaving him to pick up her coat he’d dropped on the floor, putting it away in the closet.
“Are you hungry?” he asked, when she made her way into his living room.
“Not really. And I don’t need you to wait on me. I’m going to stretch out on the sofa to rest.”
“Alyssa, don’t.” He quickened his pace so he could reach out to grab her arm. “Take my bed. I insist.”
She tugged her arm away as if she couldn’t tolerate his touch and crossed her arms over her chest. “I can’t take your bed.”
“Why not? I can’t let you sleep on the sofa.” He had two spare bedrooms, one he used as an office and the other just a junk room. When he’d invited her to move in with him, he’d intended to buy a bedroom set for the second bedroom. “Please, just this once, humor me.”
She cocked a brow. “Just this once? I thought I’d been humoring you all along.”
He couldn’t disagree. “Maybe you have, but give me a break, will you? What if you tried to roll over on my sofa and fell to the floor, landing on your stomach? I’d never forgive myself.”
Her mouth curved in a reluctant smile but then quickly faded. “Fine. I’ll take your bed. But if you wake up with a sore back, don’t blame me.”
Better him having a sore back than her, but he didn’t say anything. He headed down the hall and gestured to the bedroom, feeling somewhat awkward. “I’m, uh,
sure you remember where everything is, right?”
Avoiding his gaze, she nodded. “Yes.”
He tried not to remember the last time she’d been at his house, the night they’d made love several times, staying awake until dawn.
Pulling his gaze away from his bed, Jadon grabbed a pillow and a blanket from his linen closet. “Goodnight, Alyssa. Sleep well.”
She didn’t answer but closed his bedroom door with a loud click. He stared at it for a long moment before he turned and headed back into the living room to stretch out on his sofa.
The cloudy, snowy day should have made it easier for him to get some rest.
But even though he was dead tired, he couldn’t sleep.
Images of Alyssa, in his bed, tortured him. He’d never made love to a pregnant woman before, but kissing Alyssa had been pure heaven. He found he was enthralled by the changes in her body, especially when he discovered she was still as responsive as ever. There must be something wrong with him to see Alyssa as more sexy than ever while soft and round, carrying his children.
From a medical perspective, he knew sexual intercourse wasn’t dangerous during pregnancy. Alyssa had seemed to be as involved in their kiss as he’d been.
So why had he broken things off? Because sex didn’t solve anything. They couldn’t go back to being the carefree lovers they’d been. He didn’t have a normal family, a normal future to offer her. He couldn’t let himself fall for her. He had responsibilities. Obviously he’d help support her and the twins, but that was all he could do.
Knowing the truth didn’t ease the ache in his groin. If he hadn’t let his conscience get the better of him, they’d be sharing his bed right now.
He had no one to blame for his restlessness but himself.
ABOUT five hours later, Jadon woke up to the sound of his stomach growling. As he struggled upright on the not-so-comfortable-for-sleeping sofa, wincing against the light streaming through the living-room window, he wondered if Alyssa needed something to eat as well.
After all, she was eating for three. And working night shifts really messed up your body’s normal rhythms. If he was hungry, she had to be starved.
Yawning widely, he shuffled down the hall toward the bathroom, pausing outside the closed door to his room and listening intently for any signs that she was up and awake. When after several moments he didn’t hear a thing, he turned away. After spending a few minutes in the bathroom, he headed back to the kitchen.
Pursing